Stubborn people: 5 typical characteristics, and how to deal with them
Stubbornness can lead us to blindly defend ideas or beliefs that enslave us.
There is no single way of interpreting what life is, what it implies for us. One of the consequences of this is that each person develops a more positive or more negative way of looking at things, and a more flexible or more rigid mentality. a more flexible or more rigid mentality.
A large part of our identity comes from the way in which we learn to adapt to what happens to us, to our environment. Some people tend to constantly change their strategy depending on the results of their plans when they are applied to reality, and there are those who, no matter what happens, continue to maintain the same beliefs, opinions and attitudes.
In this article we will see precisely what it is to be a stubborn personand what are the characteristics of this way of being.
5 characteristics of stubborn people
The stubbornness can be more or less positive depending on the context, but in general, it involves a limitation that leads us to not want to part with an idea or strategy no matter what happens.. Let's see how this translates into practice.
1. They are proud
Stubborn people are not stubborn simply because they honestly believe that the right thing to do is to continue behaving as they do. They are stubborn, in part, because making a sharp turn in their attitudes, opinions, strategies or behavioral style can erode their image, revealing that a mistake has been made or that they are simply imperfect people who do not know in advance what is going to happen.
Thus, for them it does not matter so much the content of what they do, think or say, as the idea of showing themselves consistent in what they do.
2. Improvisation is your enemy
As happens to all of us, stubborn people are forced to improvise from time to time. What happens is that in their case there is an added risk of things going wrong, because if the initial decision they make turns out to be the wrong one, it is more difficult for them to correct themselves..
This is something they themselves know, and as a consequence, based on what they learn from their experiences, they prefer to avoid exposing themselves to situations where they have to make important decisions on the spur of the moment.
3. Theory matters more to them than reality
For this type of person, on many occasions, if theory does not correspond to reality, it is reality that is wrong.. This does not mean that they have a strong desire to improve the world, since the latter would require a reliable diagnosis of the problem to be addressed. It means that they prefer to shield themselves in this mental rigidity so as not to face the fact that their ideas may be wrong.
4. They want to be seen as autonomous people
As we have seen, stubborn people want to present an image of coherence and of having their own very reliable criteria. Therefore, while they do not all want to lead teams, they tend to enjoy the possibility of to be seen as intellectual referencespeople with a philosophy of life to be taken into account.
5. They have dichotomous approaches
When it comes to clinging to a belief, stubborn people need to have a justification for not taking into account all the opinions against what they do. Therefore, they often create "black lists" that lead them to dismiss the ideas of others. Anything that does not make them right in that sense, is out of any consideration or self-critical reflection.. In this way, doubts disappear.
What to do when dealing with them?
When dealing with stubborn people, follow these tips.
1. Don't laugh at their mistakes
This is important, because it is a clear confrontation. Sometimes, stubbornness can lead us to develop attitudes or behaviors that seem like a caricature, but that is no reason to laugh at the person who maintains them. Doing so will only create discomfort and will not bring them out of their mistake, because of the cognitive dissonance generated.They prefer to believe that the other person does not know what he/she is saying than to assume his/her mistakes.
2. Introduce doubt
We have also seen that stubborn people are very radical in their way of thinking, and tend to see as negative anything that goes against the belief or strategy they hold no matter what. This means that directly attacking that belief or idea will not be effective..
However, what is useful is to make the stubborn person begin to doubt them, drawing conclusions about what happens when these ideas are taken to their ultimate consequences.
3. Offer a dignified way out
It is not necessary to make it clear that what was stubbornly defended was absurd. Whoever has clung to a belief or attitude in a radical way, will hardly do so in the short term.will hardly do that in the short term. It is enough to overlook what happened and give the other person the opportunity to stop defending it blindly without raising laughter or critical comments.
(Updated at Apr 13 / 2024)