Do you consider yourself to be the jerk in your class? 4 reasons not to worry

Help against bullying and its associated problems: Stop bullying!

Do you consider yourself to be the jerk in your class? Today we give you 4 reasons not to worry.

Bullying in class: what to do when others treat you badly

Bullying is a sadly current reality in the educational landscape. Today we will not focus on the reasons why these abusers appear, but on the reasons to keep hope for those who suffer from such verbal or physical violence who, to put it in a less dramatic word, may feel that they are being victimized by those who in the future will be social misfits.

In delinquency psychology it is studied that adolescents who as adults will have social adaptation problems survive in school and high school their lack of resources in social skills with two strategies. They are the following.

What do bullies do to make you feel like a 'jerk'?

1. Physically or verbally attack other kids.

Their weaknesses (lack of communication resources, a hostile family environment, low self-esteem) cause them to seek superiority through violence. The recipients of these aggressions do not have to follow any pattern other than not being part of their group. That can make you feel like a jerk.

2. Hang out with individuals with the same deficiencies.

Subjects who will have problems adapting as adults because of their weaknesses get together at school and high school and form a hard core. hard core. If you are not part of a group they will try to hurt you by making you feel alone and left out. That can make you feel like a jerk.

If you are one of those people who suffer from the lack of social skills of violent individuals who attack to defend their insecurity, there are four reasons to hold out hope. It's a tough process, but you can stop the bullying.

Because bullying is a real problem and suffering it doesn't make you a jerk.It just makes you a person who has to deal with an unfair, undeserved conflict that can help you become stronger. Here are four reasons why you should not lose hope.

Being a victim of bullying is not the end: reasons for optimism

Asking for help makes you stronger

One of the skills you learn over the years is to ask for help. A mature and self-confident person is not afraid to assume that he or she has a problem and that this problem may be affecting or overcoming him or her momentarily. Don't be afraid to let your environment down or worry them. You are not responsible for what is happening and your environment is precisely for cases like these.

The social support network will help you in different directions. Firstly, it will make you feel listened to and cared for, so that the feeling of loneliness will gradually fade away. They can also advise you on the best way to solve the problem or which people to contact.

You should seek the support of adults, preferably family members. Their experience and resources will help you find solutions to the conflict. If you do not find this support in your family, do not hesitate to look for a person in charge of the center where you study.

Social skills can be developed

In many occasions the sensation of weakness in front of conflicts is marked by a lack of social skills. To be successful at a social level it is necessary to have those skills that help us to manage conflicts or to have social success that makes us avoid those conflicts. The good news is that these skills can be learned. Your own experiences will help you to improve them, but if you want to change and have them well developed, there is even better news.

Not saying what bothers you, shyness that prevents you from expressing yourself freely, excessive fear of not fitting in with the group, the ingenuity to express yourself with humor .... soft skills are learnedAmong other things, psychologists and coaches help you develop these skills so that you can face your social life with more confidence.

Valued traits change over time

As we said, all studies on the Psychology of Delinquency and Antisocial Behavior show that children and adolescents with aggressive or overly dominant behaviors are the ones who will have future adjustment problems.

During adolescence, strength, aggressiveness and intolerance may seem to be the most valued traits. But in a few years, in the adult society that rewards the values of sensitivity, intelligence, empathy, wit, originality... Your traits that during adolescence may seem like a weakness will become some of your main assets.

Everything that makes you feel different now will turn in your favor and consolidate as a pillar of your social identity. Don't be afraid to be different. They try to look the same to each other because they are afraid to be themselves. You are you. And that makes you very lucky.

What seems irreversible today will be a memory tomorrow.

When we are in the middle of a conflict or a problem, continued anxiety activates our metabolism and we secrete hormones at a very high rate. Our brain works twice or three times as hard as it should. This feeling of activation causes us to focus on problems and we believe and we believe that our life will always be like this.

Well, as you get older you will realize that throughout our lives we face hundreds of situations that we think are definitive... and then they are not so definitive. When you leave a partner, change jobs... we always believe that this change is definitive. And then it becomes just another memory. Life is constantly changing and dozens of very positive chapters await you. Trust that they will come.