The 8 types of assertive communication

These are the different ways in which we can express ourselves assertively.

The communication process is fundamental to develop in our personal and professional lives. Depending on which communicative styles we use, we will achieve better or worse results.

In the following article we will see which are the different types of assertive communication that exist; in this way, you will be able to adapt them to your life and have a better experience in your interpersonal relationships.

What is assertiveness?

The process of assertive communication consists fundamentally of to take care of the content and the form of the ideas that we express without leaving in the inkpot what we want to say. and at the same time without attacking others; that is, it is not enough that what is being said is true and timely, it is also necessary to express it with respect and empathy for the other.

In this way, the different types of assertive communication seek that the message reaches the receiver in a better way, without the latter feeling threatened or insulted by what is being said or by the way it is being said.

Assertive communication is therefore a form of communication free of interference, which seeks to promote a better understanding between all parties involved, and in which It tries to avoid dishonesty or lack of transparency for fear of expressing conflicting ideas..

Types of assertive communication

This is a summary of the main types of assertive communication. Each one emphasizes a characteristic aspect of assertiveness.

1. Assertive communication based on the expression of feelings

Assertive people have no problem expressing their feelings in a fluent way, because they do not see it as a sign of weakness but as a way of approaching others. they do not see it as a sign of weakness but as a way to get closer to others. with others. However, it is important to be able to detect with whom we can talk about certain topics.

2. Based on expressing respect for others

When you are assertive respect for other people is taken into account, and we try to make others respect us as much as possible.and you want others to notice it. Telling the participants in the conversation that we take their opinions into account and respect them is a sign of transparency.

3. Based on implementing active listening

Assertive communication takes into account not only how things are said, but also how listening is implemented. A person who practices assertiveness knows how to remain silent at certain times in order to listen attentively to attentively to the points of view of the other participants.

4. Based on the control of one's own emotions

The level of control one has over one's own emotions is the key to is key to assertive communication. If we let our emotions dominate us and we act on impulse at the first negative stimulus, we are far from being assertive people.

Ideally, we should be able to tolerate frustration and keep our emotions under our control in order to be able to express our feelings with greater clarity and respect.

5. Based on eye contact

This is one of the types of assertive communication that gives more weight to non-verbal communication. Eye contact is important during the communication process, as it is a way of conveying security and closeness. is a way of transmitting security and closeness to the other person..

When we use assertive communication in any circumstance, we must maintain natural eye contact with our interlocutor.

6. Based on maintaining control over our tone of voice.

The tone of voice represents the way we say things. It is not the same to express ourselves with a calm and clear tone of voice as it is to express ourselves by shouting. Even when we do not agree with someone, we must maintain a psychological climate of respect and respect. maintain a psychological climate of respect and cordiality with that person..

7. Based on being careful with body posture

The posture of our body also transmits a message, it is what is known as body and non-verbal language. We must try to that our body is in tune with our thoughts and words..

If we are expressing a relevant idea, our body must also transmit that message, so that there is harmony between the communication channels.

8. Based on knowledge of the subject

To be able to express ourselves correctly in an assertive way, it is not only enough to have the intention to do so, but also to have a certain degree of mastery of the subject matter. to a certain extent, the subject matter must be mastered to some extent.If this is not the case, then clearly express the extent of our knowledge and make it clear that we are not experts in the area.

Final tips and recommendations

It may happen that some people interpret assertive communication as an expression of weakness and lack of initiative. In these cases it is necessary to take a firm stance without being aggressive..

It will be enough to let the person know that in spite of our not very belligerent attitude we are clear about our ideas and we do not need to shout and mistreat to assert them.Without giving too many explanations, we make it clear that our position is non-negotiable.

The gestures we make when we speak are an extension of our language and denote to a great extent the relevance of the message. Gesturing is part of our non-verbal language, and in assertive communication it is relevant so that others can more effectively understand what we are trying to express to them.. However, we must be careful not to abuse this resource, in view of the fact that it could be counterproductive to our message.

Bibliographical references:

• Bower, S.A. and Bower, G.H. (1991). "Asserting Yourself: A Practical Guide for Positive Change".
• O'Donohue, William (2003). "Psychological skills training: Issues and controversies". The Behavior Analyst Today. J.D. Cautilli. 4 (3): 331 - 335.