How to create discipline in a teenager

Tips for raising and educating adolescents who follow certain rules of coexistence and behavior.

Adolescence is in many cases a complicated time of life to manage, both for the adolescent and for his or her parents.

It is clear that each case is unique, but in general, the changes in the main referents of these youngsters (who go from being the parents to being the people of the minor's age) and the tendency to impulsiveness and experimentation complicate the fact of generating discipline at home, but anyway it is not something impossible.

In this article you will find relatively simple tips on how to encourage discipline in a teenager's behavior, making it easier for him or her to follow rules and regulations.This article provides relatively simple tips on how to encourage discipline in a teenager's behavior, making it easier for them to follow rules of conduct.

How to raise and educate to generate discipline in a teenager?

Although the most conflictive cases and coexistence problems require the support of a psychologist, many times this is not necessary. These tips will help you create the optimal conditions for your adolescent son or daughter to develop a greater tendency to discipline.

1. Avoid labels and focus on correcting behaviors.

Rules are meant to encourage certain patterns of behavior and discourage others. In this sense, it is very important that when the adolescent does not comply with the rules, you direct your criticism towards his behavior, and not towards his identity or his essence as a person.. This means not using adjectives and labels such as "you have to stop being impulsive" or "you are too much of a brawler", and focusing on the specific behaviors that they tend to reproduce and that are a problem. If you don't', you will be encouraging your self-concept to be attached to those adjectives, and think of yourself in those terms, leading you to throw in the towel before trying to change.

2. Establish realistic and age-appropriate standards.

The goals to be achieved through compliance with the rules must be realistic, maintaining a balance between what he/she does spontaneously and what he/she does spontaneously. a balance between what he or she does spontaneously without trying to modulate his or her behavior, on the one hand, and an ideal, unattainable version of him or herself, on the other.. If the goals you set for him or her are too difficult considering his or her abilities and level of psychological development, he or she will become frustrated and will stop trying to comply with those rules, probably letting go of many of them altogether.

3. Explain to him the reason for these rules

To internalize the rules to follow and create discipline at home, it is necessary that he understands the reason for them, otherwise he will consider them just an imposition and will disobey them whenever it is possible for him to do so if it compensates him. Therefore, consider the needs that are covered by this system of rules to be complied with, trying to avoid arguments that are too abstract or based only on the description of values: also teach him the practical advantages of not disobeying these rules and of living in an environment in which others also follow certain behavioral models not to harm others.

4. Reinforcements and punishments should be short term.

Not much time should elapse between rewards (physical or symbolic) and punishments following positive or negative behavior. Thus, the memory of the experience that has led to these consequences is fixed in the memory in a more consistent way, together with what was experienced during the reward or punishment.. In any case, forms of punishment involving physical Pain should be avoided altogether.

5. Set an example

To show how important it is to respect the rules, you must act accordingly.. It is not necessary to be perfect in everything, but it is necessary to try not to break those rules that have been explicitly formulated and that give shape to the model of coexistence that is sought at home.

Are you looking for professional psychological support?

If you are looking for psychotherapy services for you or for your son or daughter, contact our professionals. From Cribecca Psychology We offer psychological intervention services for children, adolescents and adults, and our sessions can be face-to-face in our psychotherapy center in Seville, or online through video calls.