6 love tests to apply to your relationships
Love relationships can be very confusing, but there are almost definite warning signs.
Tests of love don't have to be things we demand of each other to prove how much we believe in the relationship. to show the extent to which they believe in the relationship. In any case, they can be understood as something rather more constructive: a way of knowing, in an approximate way, if the affective bond that unites two people is strong or if on the contrary what keeps a couple together has nothing to do with it.
Below we will see a proposed list of love tests so that they can be used on a daily basis. The idea is to look at the couple's relationship and stop to consider if between two people there are emotions that make us think of a shared and exciting project.
A help to know if it is true love
Love is always complicatedbut we can make it somewhat simpler. Specifically, we have several options to know, in an approximate way, when a relationship has solid foundations and when not.
There are many ways in which a relationship can be created in which the emotional bond is weak or almost non-existent. Think, for example, of unassertive people who are afraid to say no in order not to upset the other person. When a relationship begins, it is possible that despite the fact that the love is not reciprocated, the decision to stop giving false hopes is not faced.
Another example is manipulative people who start dating someone out of interest. In these cases, the relationship is based on someone who tries by all means to make the other practically addicted to the relationship, and to this end uses falsehoods and deceptions that feed the emotional blackmail.
Finally, something much simpler can also happen: the love ends but the routine and habits linked to the relationship continue to be perpetuated. In these cases, the feeling for the other may be confused with the fear of ending a whole lifestyle.
Love tests to evaluate the solidity of the couple's relationship
To detect these undesirable situations as soon as possible, and in the absence of couple therapy, there is nothing like resorting to some love tests.
1. You don't mind showing your love in front of others
There are many people who are very reluctant to show their feelings of tenderness in front of friends or other family members, but that does not mean that this cannot change in some situations. And... if being with your partner is not enough of an excuse to show your most affectionate side to others, what is?
At the beginning it's hard to let yourself go and offer clear signs of affection to the other person but at the end of the day, the pleasure of sharing those moments should more than compensate for the discomfort of being seen with different eyes. Expressing your feelings is not a crime.
2. Show an even-handed attitude
Many people believe that the proof of love is to do all kinds of pampering on their own initiative, from bringing breakfast in bed to letting the other person always choose the restaurant to dine at. However, this does not have to be so, and in fact it is something perfectly consistent with the behavior of a manipulative person or a partner who feels guilty and "exchanges" these small sacrifices for moments in which he or she falls into infidelity.
On the other hand, one of the best proofs of love consists of combining this cuddling with moments when you communicate assertively what your own interests are. what your own interests are. After all, a boyfriend, girlfriend, husband or wife is not a child, and treating the other as if he or she were a minor implies denying his or her condition as an adult and responsible person. In such cases, one is living an illusion.
3. Invest effort in listening
One of the situations in which it is more noticeable if the relationship is based on love and empathy is in conversations. It is in these moments when the only thing we should pay attention to is the other person's point of view. Not their physical contact or their livelihood, but their words and speech. Talking face to face means opening a small window into the mental world of the other person.means active listening.
Thus, conversations and face-to-face dialogue situations are one of the best tests of love: if there is an interest in the mental characteristics of our partner, it shows in our attitude, our non-verbal language, and the presence or absence of impatience for him or her to finish speaking. This is very useful to notice regularly, although we must keep in mind that tiredness can also create distractions not caused by a lack of love.
4. Open conversations regularly
What do we do when we love someone passionately? At the very least, think about that person very often. And, in this day and age, a good way to sense how often that happens is how many phone and social media conversations our partner initiates.
Excesses are always bad, of course, and constant texting indicates that something is wrong (possibly jealousy or mistrust), but the relative absence of attempts to get in touch during the time when you are not in the same place is reason to ask if everything is okay. Which brings us to the next point.
5. Ask how you feel
A relationship is not simply a piece of life in which to invest time and resources. It is also a place where we go to pay attention to each other, to see how we can be of help. That's why something as simple as asking "how do you feel?" Is such a powerful tool and, on the other hand, a sign of love.
6. You don't have a hard time apologizing
Even in the most perfect couples, mistakes abound. That's why, when they appear on the other person's part, it's good to notice if and how they apologize. At the end of the day, if pride outweighs the desire to make the other feel better, something is wrong in the relationship.something is wrong in the relationship.
(Updated at Apr 15 / 2024)