I can’t stop thinking: possible causes and solutions

Not being able to stop thinking over and over again about the same things is a fairly common problem.

Think of a white bear. Now, stop thinking about it. Have you succeeded? Probably not. It is very difficult to stop thinking about something deliberately. The human mind has no magic button to remove a thought from the plane of consciousness. We will simply have to wait for it to go away on its own.

In our day to day life there are many intrusive thoughts that can invade our mind. Some do so for only a few minutes, while others, more worrisome, keep us thinking about them for hours on end, cause us discomfort and, the more we try to make them go away, the more strongly they latch onto our consciousness.

"I can't stop thinking" is the reality that frustrates many who can't get rid of ideas and images of disturbing content.. Their worries, obsessions and ruminations dominate them. Let's see what they can do.

I can't stop thinking: understanding this psychological problem

The thoughts that come to our minds involuntarily are known as intrusive thoughts. They are ideas or images that come to our heads out of the blue, either because we have seen or heard something that has awakened them or because they have just appeared. To have them is something completely normal and, at first, we should not worry because from time to time ideas come to our minds without us wanting them.

However, we should not ignore the fact that it is precisely intrusive thoughts that are the fuel of which psychological processes such as worries, concerns, anxiety and anxiety are the main source of our thoughts. psychological processes such as preoccupations, obsessions and rumination. They are ideas and images that echo inside our skull and, if they cause us discomfort and we try to fight them so that they leave us alone, it turns out that they become stronger. What we try to stop thinking, we think even more intensely.

"I can't stop thinking." This is the recurring phrase in those who have been caught in a maelstrom of recurring intrusive thoughts. Worries and obsessions flood your mind, making you turn over and over again to the same subject. Sometimes, the discomfort caused by these involuntary thoughts is so great and the feeling of lack of control is so demotivating that it takes away the desire to do anything, such as going out with friends or enjoying a TV series.

What can we do to stop thinking? We have already said that it is difficult, and that it all boils down to having the good fortune that the intrusive ideas do not reappear, in addition to attending psychotherapy.

Egodystonic thoughts

Everyone can experience intrusive thoughts. It is normal. They appear from time to time and, just as they came, they go away. However, sometimes they can become very disturbing and cause us discomfort. This is especially the case when the intrusive thoughts are egodystonic, i.e., that they conflict with the individual's values or self-concept of self.. The person perceives them as unacceptable.

Ideas and images that we do not want and that we perceive as not leaving us alone may bring with them a whole irrational interpretation. As we keep thinking about them and get frustrated that this is the case, we start having related thoughts, usually with a negative theme, which only further entrench the original annoying idea. It brings up all sorts of dysfunctional beliefs about it, such as, "I don't know what to think. such as, for example, "it is bad to have these thoughts", "if I think it means that I will do it", "it is not normal what happens to me"...

Obsessions, worries and rumination

When we cannot stop thinking about something it is because we are immersed in psychological processes that do not stop giving him turns to a same idea or image. Depending on the content of the thought we can speak, mainly, of three phenomena:

Obsessions

Obsessions are intrusive and repetitive thoughts.. These may be ideas or images that are unwanted by the individual and that he or she considers unacceptable, causing discomfort because he or she feels that he or she has no control over them. As he wants to get rid of these ideas, the person tries to put into practice several actions with the intention of controlling them, without success.

Worries

Worries are anticipatory thoughts about what might happen in the future.. As the name suggests, they are "pre-worries", it is keeping the mind occupied with something that has not yet happened, and that we are also not sure if it will happen. Negative consequences are foreseen and we try to find a solution to certain problems.

It should be said that worries are not pathological by themselves. In fact, they can be considered adaptive as long as they are used to prevent or solve real problems. Once these problems are solved, worry should cease to exist.

However, worries become problematic when they lose control and lead to a whole thread of thoughts about the bad things that could happen in the future, posing extremely catastrophic scenarios. In this case, we would speak of worries with surrealistic contents, which deal with extremely improbable events, but which the person cannot stop thinking about and truly fears that they will happen.

Rumination

Rumination focuses on past events.. It is the fact that the person thinks over and over again about what happened to him/her, mistakes he/she made, significant losses, missed opportunities or things he/she would have liked to do that he/she did not do. It is a psychological process that is accompanied by evaluations and judgments about oneself, usually very critical.

The white bear problem: why we can't stop thinking about something.

In psychology we call as "the white bear problem" the ironic situation in which deliberate attempts to suppress a thought only increase the likelihood of its recurrence.. The name of such a peculiar problem is due to the following example: if we were to tell someone to think about a white bear and then tell him to stop thinking about it, it is very unlikely that he would achieve this second directive. The reason for this is that we cannot stop our thoughts just like that, and all we will do is think about it even more.

If this inability to stop thinking about what we are thinking about occurs as a matter of course, it increases when we are emotionally tense and anxious. Anxiety is an experience that predisposes us to have more intrusive thoughts and that end up becoming obsessions, worries and ruminations. and that end up becoming obsessions, worries and ruminations. As we cannot control them, we find ourselves more nervous and, in turn, more of these ideas appear.

How to stop thinking about something you don't want to think about.

To stop thinking about something that obsesses us or worries us is complicated. We human beings don't have an off button for our minds. Fortunately, there are a number of strategies that can help us avoid thinking so much about what is currently occupying our minds and causing us discomfort. So, if there is something that obsesses you, it is important that you take into account the following points.

Relativize the thought

Regardless of the type of intrusive thought that invades our mind, a good way to weaken its effect is to relativize them. They are thoughts, ideas and images that are inside our head, not outside it.. They are not facts, nor do they define us or what may happen. Whatever the thought in question.... Having these types of thoughts does not make us a better or worse person, nor does it mean that they will happen.

2. Accept that we cannot stop them

Trying to stop thinking about something when we are thinking it does not work. No matter how much we tell ourselves "stop thinking about this" or resort to similar behaviors, the thought is unlikely to stop when it happens. We must accept that we cannot stop them at the moment.

This does not mean that we cannot stop thinking about it, but simply that we must understand that when the intrusive idea appears it will be there, it will occupy our consciousness for a moment. It will eventually go away. Trying to fight against it at the moment of occurrence only makes it more present and, therefore, to think about it more.

3. Managing our emotions

One of the factors that most attracts recurrent ideas is being emotionally tense, especially being stressed. The management of emotions is a fundamental aspect to have psychological well-being, and it has a great impact on what comes to our mind. If our state of mind is negative, negative ideas will come to our mind and it is likely that we will not stop thinking about them..

On the contrary, if we are in a good mood, it is more difficult for us to think about unpleasant things. As our mind will already be occupied with various positive ideas and feelings, we will not occupy it with harmful thoughts such as obsessions, worries and ruminations of all kinds and conditions.