Touchy people: their 6 characteristics, and how to deal with them.

Several tips on how to relate to these people without fueling conflict.

Whatever the lifestyle we lead, it is clear that sooner or later we end up running into touchy people. Individuals who create drama at the drop of a hat and, although they may not necessarily enjoy conflict, the truth is that they take it all to the personal level very easily.

In this article we will see how to identify susceptible people by their typical characteristics.. However, keep in mind that these are general indications, and that each human being is a world that cannot be summarized completely with just one label.

The characteristics of susceptible people

Among the signs that show that we are dealing with a susceptible person, we find the following.

1. In the face of ambiguity, they see conflict.

In personal relationships there are usually many moments of ambiguity, which are open to multiple interpretations. When this happens, particularly susceptible people assume the worst possible scenario, and easily imagine offenses directed at them.

2. They do not stop to reflect on their anger.

Another of the basic aspects of touchy people is that they do not stop too long to consider what has really happened when they feel offended. However, they do not always directly confront the person they feel has attacked them; it is also possible to simply adopt a passive-aggressive attitude.

3. They try to make the conversation revolve around the alleged attack.

It is not easy for these individuals to turn the page in a matter of seconds, since they attach so much importance to the cause of their discomfort that they may try to put aside the topic of conversation that was being discussed before, or what was being done.

Although that doesn't mean it's impossible to prevent that false attack from taking center stageThere are ways to show that it has no reason to be and therefore should not be paid attention to.

How to relate to them?

If there is one thing that characterizes us as a species, it is diversity. Human beings are capable of adopting many ways of living life, and that is why we have different personalities, attitudes and ways of living. different personalities, attitudes and ways of perceiving life and personal relationships..

However, our diversity means that in some cases, we find people with a very extreme personal characteristic, much more developed than the average. When this characteristic has to do with hostile attitudes or the ease of generating conflict, it can become a challenge to deal with such individuals.

Susceptible people are a reality that it is better to know how to manage in our personal relationships, without necessarily making friends with them. Practically no conversation is predestined to end in arguments and anger, no matter how predisposed to conflict it may be.no matter how much predisposition to conflict there may be.

1. Do not ridicule

Sometimes, the susceptibility of the person talking to us may seem like a joke to us. However, for them the reason for their anger is very real, they do not do comedy.

The first step is to accept that they are really offended, although this does not mean that we give much importance to the situation if we see that it is not serious enough to limit ourselves not to feed this confrontation.

2. Apologize only when you have reason to

Apologizing for the simple fact that someone has taken a comment or action badly is not recommended, at least in all cases. It should only be done if there really has been a reasonable misunderstandingthat is, one that you believe most other people could have fallen into in that context.

It may seem that by refusing to apologize to the susceptible person you are generating conflict, but this does not have to be the case. In many cases, apologizing will only fuel the narrative that there has been an offense, not a misunderstanding, and that can further vitiate the conversation. can further vitiate the conversation, anchoring it in hostility..

3. If you are going to criticize, adopt an impersonal and constructive perspective.

When you want to criticize something that a particularly sensitive person has done, do so by referring to the perspective of a fictitious person who does not know anyone involved, and always emphasize what can be improved, not what is wrong.

4. Use non-hostile nonverbal language

Your postures and gestures should denote confidence and acceptance, not hostility or defensiveness. Avoid slouching or keeping your arms crossed or covering much of your area. or covering much of your frontal area in general, and show that the context does not deserve to see an enemy in the other person.

5. Maintain a polite attitude, but don't obsess.

Being afraid of offending the other person makes no sense, because that in any case only generates a rarefied atmosphere to which susceptible people tend to be sensitive. Just assume that you don't have to try to fully control the situation, and maintain basic standards of politeness.

Bibliographical references:

• Gimero-Bayón, Ana (1996). Comprendiendo como somos. Dimensions of personality. Bilbao: Desclée de Brouwer.
• González, José (1987). Psicología de la personalidad. Madrid: Biblioteca Nueva.