Isolation, connection and group care in the face of the pandemic

The coronavirus pandemic makes it more important than ever to create networks of support and empathy.

Oddly enough, when abandonment and loneliness seemed to be the epidemic in our society, we are living through this global alarm and pandemic. We all found ourselves dealing with lonely children, with over-busy parents.

We were not aware of the near abandonment in which we were all dancing alone, with no real networks of contact, and suddenly this crisis arises with its possibility of change. Suddenly, we are forced to coexist, to relate to each other, to look at each other within the safety distance..

Emotions are also contagious: the importance of the collective.

We share spaces and, in them, we share our states. Adults and young people are infected by the emotions that reverberate in the house, in the shared walls. We have no escape, either we calm our discomfort so that this healthy current reaches all the members of the house, or the home becomes a spiral of rising tension..

If we adults smile, pick up our fear, our tiredness, our boredom, then something relaxes in the collective atmosphere. We begin to feel better and so do they, the children and young people. Then they smile, they propose something fun and the atmosphere relaxes. The safety distance does not protect us from emotional contagion; emotional currents are regulated and redirected by adults..

As mammals, we need attachment behaviors to calm us down, to regulate us. Acts such as looking at each other face to face, perceiving each other as close, listening to a warm prosody in the other's voice... make us feel good, fill us with security.

That is why, in these days of confinement, group behaviors and networking become essential.They provide us with visual information and voice loudness among others. This makes us feel safe, safe in connection.

We have to take care of fear, of that fear that floats in the environment from which our bubble of walls does not protect us. fear deactivates care. Care and collective connection are what provide us with safety and calm. How curious we are. What a paradox we are exposed to in these times. Loneliness and contact.

An opportunity to develop network, community and support in spite of isolation.

We can always learn to manage that complicated emotion of fear, the lack of security. Numerous collective initiatives are emerging that make us feel part of something much bigger that goes beyond the walls of our homes. The window, a connection of gratitude to those who are caring for and fighting for those most affected, helps us to continue to feel like a group, a community.

It is overwhelming to see individual and collective initiatives of help and support that overcome the barriers and limits of the buildings.. The applause and other signs of solidarity become group meeting points, reminding us that we are many and that there are groups fighting, supporting on the front line against this invisible enemy. In the help that unfolds, we seek to comfort each other and convey the hope that we are not alone.

For example, the EMDR community has developed the Children EMDR global Alliancewhere therapists from all over the world share resources. Within this framework I have written the story I don't see you and I know you're there Coronavirus, and I also know you're going away.. The illustrations have been made by children of all ages from 7 to 70. In them they share, express in a genuine and spontaneous way their fears and hopes.

In addition, in the Txoko de Vitaliza it is possible to find samples of these shared resources.

At the same time, EMDR Spain Association offers a volunteer program of psychologists and psychiatrists trained in trauma, to intervene in acute stress.to intervene in acute stress, collaborating with the institutions that offer emotional accompaniment and detect cases that require further help. Information can be found on the website of the association.

Conclusion

In collaboration and help, we humanize ourselves and feel comforted as a group.. I hope that when we go out in freedom, without fear, we will still be able to continue with the behaviors of collaboration and care that suppress fear and self-interest. I hope that when that time comes, we will remember how much comfort we take today from simple, simple acts, from feeling part of a group, of a humanity that is capable of caring. I hope that we will be able to take care of each other and to take care of our fields and seas, our planet.