Sexual sadism: symptoms and characteristics of this paraphilia
Sexual sadism can go beyond bed games and become a disorder.
During sex, it is natural for couples to experiment with certain attitudes that are arousing. For example, playing with a certain degree of control and dominance on the part of one partner or the other is a circumstance that both partners may seek.
In this article we will detail what sadistic attitudes during sex consist of, as well as examine to what extent they can be considered normal and at what point they become a paraphilia (sexual disorder). We will review the characteristics of sexual sadismand what it implies from the point of view of psychology.
What is sexual sadism?
We can say that a person has sadistic attitudes in his or her intimate life when he or she experiences some degree of pleasure in causing physical or psychological pain to his or her sexual partner. As we have seen above, some degree of agreed and choreographed sadism is quite common during the practice of sex when it does not become a disorder.
Taking into consideration that while practicing the sexual act, certain dominance behaviors motivated by our most irrational side can emerge, it is common for sex to be linked to a certain degree of role-playing. But there comes a point where we can no longer speak of role-playing, but of real violence.
Usually the person with sadistic behaviors can carry out his or her particular practices of dominance and control (inflicting some kind of pain). (inflicting some kind of pain) with people who are aware of them and consent to them without any problem, because they enjoy them. Sexually compatible couples have no problem with this circumstance. But in other cases, this agreement does not occur, or occurs under unequal conditions.
On the other hand, the disorder of sexual sadism represents a significant discomfort in the life of the subject who presents it, and also affects intensely the sexual partners that he/she may have.
Typical symptoms and behaviors of sadism
Below we will review a list of behaviors that are common in sexual practices and that have an intrinsic component of sadism.
1. Foul language
Foul language consists of verbalizing rude words towards our sexual partner, which can make him/her feel a degree of humiliation. Usually this type of language is accompanied by other sadistic behaviors of a physical nature.
2. Spanking
One of the most characteristic and common behaviors of sadism is spanking. These are not usually seen as mistreatment, but as a sign of playfulness between the couple, despite the fact that in a strict sense they do constitute physical aggression, however minimal it may be. in a strict sense they do constitute a physical aggression, however minimal it may be, beyond moral considerations.This is beyond moral considerations as to whether they are appropriate in a certain context.
3. Hair pulling
Another of the most common behaviors of sadism in sex is the pulling of the hair of the partner. the fact of pulling the hair of the partner while having sex, or any kind of intimate contact (it could be nothing more than kissing).
4. Wrapping hands around the neck
This is perhaps one of the most risky behaviors of sadism, and is on the verge of being considered risky. It involves wrapping one's hands around a partner's neck in a strangling manner while engaging in some type of sexual activity, usually penetration.
When does sadism become a problem?
These are just some of the sexual practices where sadistic behaviors can be evidenced, apart from these, there is a Wide range that will depend on the particular tastes of each couple. there is a wide range that will depend on the particular tastes of each couple..
Sexually compatible couples do not usually have any kind of problem experimenting these activities, since they are not sudden or malicious actions, but respond to a previous agreement regarding the particular tastes of each one of them.
Let us now see when sadistic behavior can go from being something natural during the sexual act, to becoming a significant problem in life. become a significant problem in people's lives.. As we have seen so far, sadism understood as role-playing and prior agreement does not necessarily imply a problem for couples, unless it affects various aspects of their lives.
But if, for example, the person feels that it is difficult to control his or her aggressive behaviors during sexual activity, or if it always involves pain that the other person is unhappy with, sadism may be moving from being adaptive to becoming a sexual disorder. from being adaptive to becoming a sexual disorder (paraphilia). (paraphilia).
Let's look at exactly what the characteristics of a sexual sadism disorder look like. The following list contains the criteria that show whether sadism is a drawback to the natural development of sexuality and life of people suffering from this disorder.
1. Intensity
Intensity is a determining factor when moving from an adaptive situation to a maladaptive one; a light hair pulling, a spanking with moderate force, or a few obscene words is not the same as a slight hair pulling, a spanking with moderate force, or some obscene words, to to the blows or to a marked physical and psychological punishment..
2. Frequency
Frequency refers to the subject's ability to control sadistic behaviors, it is not always appropriate or comfortable to express sexual desire through practices of this type..
At certain times, other methods of a more docile nature can be used, such as kissing, caressing, among other sexual displays that do not involve mistreatment. If the person is unable to put aside the abuse and only focuses on inflicting pain and humiliation, we may be in the presence of a disorder.
3. Areas affected
The degree of affectation of sexual sadism disorder goes beyond sex, being able to interfere in several aspects of people's daily life (family, work, etc.). The level of anguish is so intense that it prevents the subject from prevents the subject from developing adequately in society..
4. Comorbidity with other disorders
Comorbidity refers to the fact that symptoms of more than one disorder may be evident at the same time.This is common in sexual behavior disorders. For example, when sadism becomes a disorder, it can lead to difficulty in reaching orgasm, among other problems.
(Updated at Apr 13 / 2024)