Is it possible to sing in the rain?

To what extent are we capable of being happy when going through crisis situations?

For many years, a discourse has been spreading according to which being happy is equivalent to "reaching" certain stages of life that consist of accumulating material and social goods.

On the one hand, earning enough money to make acquisitions such as owning a house, a car, certain types of clothes and high quality accessories that supposedly reflect the value of the person, etc. On the other hand, the creation of a family based on the traditional family model, with children and even, if possible, a pet.

That is to say, that the idea that happiness means achieving a series of requirements linked to the concept of the "ideal citizen" has been defended. This is already problematic in itself because it implies that a person cannot be happy if he or she does not meet these requirements, something that it is easy to see does not correspond to reality.

This in itself is problematic because it implies that a person cannot be happy if he or she does not meet these requirements, something that does not take long to see that does not correspond to reality: it is not at all uncommon to see people who have access to happiness despite not having a partner or children, or who live in rented accommodation.

Now then... What happens when a person is not only far from this ideal of happiness, but also falls into a stage of crisis that brings him or her closer to situations that we actively associate with unhappiness? Can a person remain happy despite the fact that there is a complicated situation around him or her? Let's see it below.

• Related article, "On happiness: what is it that we all seek?"

Is it possible to be happy in the face of adversity?

If there is one thing that characterizes human beings, it is their ability to modify their behavior and their way of thinking and managing their emotions in order to adapt to their environment.. This extraordinary psychological flexibility is what has allowed us, among other things, to be one of the very few species of large terrestrial mammals capable of living on all continents and in a wide variety of ecosystems, for example.

However, as animals capable of learning all kinds of things, this ability is not only embodied in the way we take advantage of the resources available around us to satisfy our Biological needs necessary for short-term survival. We are also capable of learning to adjust our emotions to situations that, from the point of view of Western societies, may at first seem impossible to overcome.

For example, it is known that people who suffer injuries or illnesses that take away their ability to use one of their senses (e.g., alterations that produce acquired blindness) or who suffer loss of limbs, after a period of time, are able to reach levels of well-being and happiness comparable to those before they suffered that health problem, are able to reach levels of wellbeing and happiness comparable to those they had before they suffered the health problem..

And the same happens in many cases in which the problem is not in the body itself, but in the context of the person's life: whether it is the family context, the city in which one lives, the country of residence, etc.

The key concept to understand why we are able to adapt to such situations not only in a practical or instrumental sense, but also emotionally and in terms of our ability to experience well-being and even happiness, is what in psychology is known as resilience.

What do we mean by resilience?

Resilience is our ability to ability to psychologically overcome crisis situations, i.e., the ability we have to not only prevent the crisisIn other words, the ability we have not only to prevent discomfort from paralyzing us and preventing us from seeking solutions to a problem, but also to adapt to certain shortcomings and cope with a certain level of discomfort in a stoic way, without focusing on everything that generates discomfort and does not depend on us, and focusing on what we can change.

Thus, having a good level of resilience involves readjusting our expectations, accepting a certain level of discomfort to emotional pain and getting actively involved in actions aimed at improving our situation (and/or that of the people around us), so that this project is, in turn, something capable of stimulating us and making us feel motivated and excited about the progress we can make in this regard.

For this reason, resilience is also known in a more informal way as "the psychological immune system": after a period of maladjustmentAfter a period of maladjustment, it helps us to face adversities and to overcome very complicated situations.

The ability to be a happy person is not lost

Resilience is not disconnected from our capacity to be happy.. In fact, the adoption of this active role in the pursuit of goals is a source of well-being in itself, and even a means by which we can obtain happiness. Paradoxically, it may happen that a person feels happier shortly after entering a stage of crisis than when he or she perceived that all his or her objective needs were satisfied.

The answer has to do with the following: happiness is not and cannot be the product of an accumulation of goods or easily determined social status. If it were, there would be an instruction manual for achieving happiness, which would be similar to a shopping list.

Happiness is a psychological state that arises when we engage in projects that have important meaning for us and that go beyond the avoidance of pain or even access to experiences that offer us comfort. And that is why when we put our "resilient mode" into action, we are able to be happy.

Of course, this does not mean that it is useless to strive for societies that guarantee the satisfaction of basic needs for the entire population, or that poverty should not be fought. Individual psychological processes are one thing, but social transformations that can help people gain control and decision-making capacity over their lives are another. However, we must not forget that happiness is a process of construction in which there is no pre-established starting and finishing point, and that is why it challenges us all.