5 signs that warn us that a person is insecure
Insecure people: do they have an inferiority complex or are they just shy?
I'm sure it has happened to you at some point: you meet someone, you start talking about any topic and, all of a sudden, you notice that awkwardness invades the conversation, you notice that discomfort invades the conversation..
At this moment it is normal that you feel that you are the one who is causing the discomfort in the other person.
Insecure people: inferiority complex or simple shyness?
Up to the moment you start talking to that person, everything was going perfectly: you had had a good day, you felt good about yourself. But from the moment you feel uncomfortable with the conversation you are having, you begin to have certain doubts about your appearance, your body language, your ability to communicate... In principle, the person in front of you has an impeccable image, a good position in his company and great communication skills. But he has the particularity of wanting to show everyone how well he is doing in life, whether in a relaxed context or in a business meeting.
In front of these people, it is not unusual for us to feel very small, insignificant, overwhelmed by their personal stories that show us how well they are doing.overwhelmed by their personal stories that show us that they seem to be people with magnificent lives.
Inferiority complex: a concept developed by Adler
The psychology behind the attitude displayed by these people was developed by the Austrian psychoanalyst Alfred Adlerwho proposed the concept of inferiority complex. In Adler's own words, people who have an inferiority complex tend to devote a lot of effort to overcompensation through what Adler calls "striving for superiority".
Insecure people who do not know how to manage their insecurity may try to feel happy by making the people around them feel unhappy. Adler adds that this incessant struggle to feel superior is one of the most obvious signs of neurosis.
Obviously, not all insecure people are neurotic.. Sometimes insecure individuals channel this characteristic through withdrawal or shyness. In fact, they are usually the majority, but in this post we will pay more attention to the insecure with inferiority complex described by Adler.
5 signs that indicate that we are in front of an insecure person
We will now explain the different indicators and signs that can warn us that we are dealing with an insecure person... and with an inferiority complex.
1. They may try to make you feel insecure about yourself.
In the case of people with an inferiority complex, it is quite common for them to start questioning you and making you feel bad.. Most often, they are not particularly rude or impolite; if they make you feel bad, it is precisely because they show a false friendliness. It is also common for people with an inferiority complex to try to let you know their accomplishments and virtues at all costs. If you normally feel good about yourself but start to doubt your worth when you are with certain people, it is possible that they are projecting their fears and insecurities onto you.
2. They need to show you their value and achievements
It is not a prerequisite that you feel insecure when conversing with a person to conclude that this person is projecting his or her complex onto you. Individuals who continually brag about their education, lifestyle, personal and work accomplishments, and perfect family, may be trying to convince themselves that they are outstanding and valuable people..
3. Frequently uses false modesty
False modesty is one of the ways insecure people use to brag about their accomplishments. For example, you may have noticed that you have a contact on social networks who often complains about all the trips he or she has to take, but who what he really wants to show is that he has an important job..
4. They tend to be critical on a recurring basis
People who have a permanent feeling of inferiority tend to show that they have refined tastes and high expectations about everything around them. In fact, they are often they are often labeled as snobsThey are very critical of all cultural products that they believe are not up to par. They use this strategy not only to give an image of special people but also as a method of self-evaluation.
5. Beware, there are insecure people who are worth getting to know
Not all insecure people have an inferiority complex. Therefore, there are people who feel insecure because they are shy, or because the social situation (the context) of the interaction makes them a little uncomfortable. To converse with these people, be sure to be pleasant and easy-goingso that you don't appear to be interrogating or scrutinizing them. If you create a good rapport with them, they are likely to open up to you and you can have a very pleasant interaction.
(Updated at Apr 12 / 2024)