Fear of decision making: what it is, causes and how to deal with it

Fear of decision making is a natural phenomenon, but it can sometimes cause problems.

Fear of decision making is a common occurrence.Since deciding is something we do practically every day, there is always a certain fear of making a mistake or not being able to live up to what we have chosen.

On many occasions this indecision is solved by allowing some time to pass, meditating more deeply and getting a little more information to make up our minds.

However, sometimes it can become a real problem, a situation of constant doubt that traps us, limiting our lives by not making the decision to choose one path or another. Let's go into this curious but problematic situation of hesitation.

Fear of decision making

Making decisions is not an easy task, especially if we have to decide on something very important. Every decision brings with it consequences and, although we always want good things to happen, this is not always the case. That is why it is normal to be a little afraid before deciding on a matter, for fear of making a mistake and that what comes with it afterwards may harm both us and third parties.

But life is full of decisions. We have to decide to change jobs or stay in one that burns us out but gives us economic stability. We have to decide between having children or waiting a few more years. We have to decide, and on many things. This is why it is so important to learn to manage the fear of decision making, to learn to handle the uncertainty of our lives and to face situations with more calm and security.

Some call the fear of decision making "deciphobia". It is not an academic term that refers to a specific phobia, since it is not. It is simply the situation in which we are afraid, almost fearful, of having to face a situation in which we have to choose between two or several options, which may involve a transcendental decision in our lives. This situation generates anxiety, stress and, if it is lived with a lot of psychological discomfort, it can be said that it acquires psychopathological nuances.

What does fear of decision making involve?

In decision making there can always be a certain component of fear, a certain fear that once we have chosen an option, it may turn out to be the wrong one, the consequences of which will be to a greater or lesser extent our responsibility. Having to bear the burden of guilt for not having made the right choice is something we do not want to have to face and, therefore, this fear appears during the decision making process.

However, if this fear is too high if this fear is too high, preventing us from choosing one option or the other, we have a problem.. In life we have to choose and, even if we are not sure, sooner or later we will have to make a choice. We cannot delay the decision any longer because, otherwise, the current situation may worsen, making the old options no longer valid and be replaced by new ones, which may lead us into a new situation of indecision.

The fear of decision making may be so high that we exaggeratedly avoid having to make a decision. We start a passive response, deciding to wait for the situation to fix itself.We are confident that time will solve the problem or that it will reduce the original options and make it easier for us to make decisions.

When we stop facing that which generates fear we think that this emotion will disappear by itself, but in reality this is not so. The fear of the consequences continues and, although we believe that these consequences will no longer be our responsibility, the truth is that not choosing is also a decision and therefore we are responsible for it. Moreover, in this case we can find ourselves in a worse situation, in which as we have not been the ones who have chosen, we enter into a situation of great uncertainty without knowing what is going to happen.

Another of the behaviors related to the fear of decision making is the procrastination of the decision motivated by the idea that we need to obtain more information to decide on an option. information to decide on an option. It is true that waiting until we have more information on a given issue can help us to make a better informed decision. However, it can also happen that this is an excuse, and that the motive behind it is not really an interest in having a broader vision but to delay the decision making process by hiding behind the fact that we still do not have enough information.

It is normal that when we have to decide on something very important we get stuck.. All kinds of negative and catastrophic thoughts go through our mind about how bad it could be if we choose one path or another, causing fear to paralyze us and lead us to a situation of constant doubt, making us hesitate about absolutely all the options. Not knowing what to do, we remain blocked, which causes us a high level of anxiety.

How to manage this indecision?

While feeling a little fear and anxiety while making a decision is normal, this is no longer normal when it makes it impossible for us to continue with our lives completely. We don't make up our minds, getting stuck and feeling very anxious, which is a problem that can lead to a lot of problems.This is a problem that we must learn to manage. There are several strategies that can help us to manage the fear of decision making.

1. Identify that fear

Fear is a necessary emotion, a feeling that helps us to prevent danger. It is natural to have it when we are in a situation in which we have to decide. However, if we try to deny it, to run away from it, it will grow, making us delay our decision making for a long time, bringing with it only discomfort and potential negative consequences due to laziness..

We must listen, accept, dare to feel and understand this fear, knowing that we feel it because we are in a situation in which we have to decide about something that will bring, as everything in this life, its consequences. Listening to it will help us to understand its meaning, to know what we are afraid of and will make it easier for us to assume the future consequences of our choice.

2. Accept uncertainty

Uncertainty is always present in our lives. We must understand that when making decisions there is a certain degree of control, but we cannot control everything, since there are circumstances that are beyond our control. because there are circumstances that are out of our hands.

That is why we have to tolerate uncertainty, to understand that in life there are always things that are beyond our control and beyond the control of others. It is necessary to trust more in our capacity to choose and, also, in our capacity to face the consequences of our decisions.

3. What is the worst that can happen?

The anxiety and the fear present during the decision making make that our mind is invaded by a rain of pessimistic thoughts. All kinds of catastrophes come to mind, situations in which we do not want to find ourselves, scenarios that we want to avoid at all costs. Sometimes there are so many thoughts running through our heads that we don't even have time to process them.

A good way to face them is to ask ourselves "What is the worst that can happen?" When we ask ourselves this question we can put a face and a name to our fears, associate them to concrete consequences and see that they may not be so bad and that the best thing we can do is to make a decision once and for all. we can see that they may not be so bad and that the best thing we can do is to make a decision once and for all..

4. Learning to feel capable of making good decisions

The fear of making decisions and the passive response of waiting for time to decide for us can lead us into a very limiting situation. By not seeing ourselves as capable of deciding on our own, we run the risk of losing many good opportunities for growth and wellbeing, as well as trapping ourselves in a feeling of helplessness, feeling that what happens to us does not depend on us.

In life we have to be very unlucky for everything we decide to do to go wrong.. It is true that there are moments in which mistakes are made, but if we meditate deeply on the decision to choose this happens with less probability. This is why we must learn to feel capable of making good decisions, being aware that as long as we reflect on what we are going to do, it is quite likely that we will have more positive than negative consequences.