Guide to meeting new people: sites, skills and tips

How to meet new people and expand your circle of friends?

It is not a question of being more or less spontaneous, more or less shy or more or less extraverted. Meeting new people is no easy task.

The art of communicating and enjoying the sympathy of other people is complex. Many of us want to have more friends, more people to confide in, but the truth is that we rarely get down to work to achieve it, because we believe that it is a way of recognizing that we are quite alone in this life. Besides, it seems that when we have reached a certain age it is "normal" that we already enjoy our group of friends.but...

The definitive guide to meet new people

The truth is that we all (or almost all of us) have this feeling that our social life is a bit stagnant.. The circumstances by which we may notice that we do not have as many friends as we would like are varied: we have moved to a new city, we have had love relationships that have changed the landscape of our social life, we are too immersed in our work, we have become accustomed to having a minimal repertoire of colleagues, or simply because we enjoy hobbies hobbies.

You can have a thousand motivations for wanting to meet more people. The key is to seek out environments and situations in which you can engage in spontaneous and natural conversations with people who, for some reason, catch your attention.

Sometimes, this type of social situations where everything plays in our favor to meet people are not so easy to find. Not to mention that, with each passing year, it can be a little more complicated to make new friends and open up to the world. We need to do our part: you will have to shake off your embarrassment, jump into the limelight and leave your comfort zone.

To help you in this endeavor to meet new people and bring new colors to your life, we wanted to put together this practical guide. Here you will find places where you can make new friends, as well as tips and communication techniques to make it easier for you.

• Take a look at this post: "The 6 psychological keys to make people like you".

Places to meet people

When looking for places to meet new people, it is best to focus on those places where you are likely to meet the same people on a recurring basis.. Valid examples: a sports club, a gym or a coffee shop with a loyal parish. This way, by going to a site frequently you will have more chances to interact with people who are familiar with you, and it will be easier to meet new people.

However, never forget these tips:

• Create friendly and natural interactions. Think that it is not necessary (nor advisable) that you act stridently. It is much more advisable to be cautious and pleasant, since you will be seeing these people on a daily basis.
• It is a very good idea that the places you choose are places where you will meet potential friends with hobbies, ideas and jobs with which you feel comfortable and identified.. If you don't like soccer, for example, it's a bad idea to go to a soccer team's club, because you'll feel like an octopus in a garage.
• If you go to a birthday party or an event, try to arrive a little before it starts, so you can start getting to know each other.so you can start to get to know the people attending. If you arrive late, people will already know each other and will be talking in small groups, and it may be more difficult for you to get into a group.
• Keep in mind that familiarity is a good thing; the more you know a person, the easier it is to like them.The more you know a person, the easier it is to like them. That's why it's important that you are a regular in some places that allow you to be in contact with other people.

Ultimately, it's all a matter of time and opening up to others. Not all interactions will go as you expect them to, but little by little you will be fostering a good rapport with the people around you.

• Recommended reading: "The 10 basic communication skills".

More interesting places and environments where to meet people are the following:

Attend a cooking course for beginners (or an English course, or a salsa course...) 2.

If you sign up for a class in something you are passionate about, you are more than likely to make new friends.. Be careful, you don't want to attend these classes with the sole intention of making new friends. Simply choose an activity that appeals to you in and of itself, and once you are there it will be easier to connect with other people who like the same thing. Dance classes, language classes, cooking classes, painting classes, craft classes... there are many facets to this life that are just waiting for you to give them a chance.

If you sign up for, say, German classes, keep in mind that the other attendees may be very dedicated to homework and books, and not so much engaged in conversation with other attendees. To combat this, it's a good idea to show up a few minutes before each class so you have time to interact with other students and get to know them a little better.

2. Organize a party and invite friends and acquaintances.

If you already have some friends close to where you live, it is a great idea to organize a party in your own home.. You can ask your friends to invite several of their co-workers or people they get along with, and it's easy to connect with new people. Being the host is an added bonus!

3. Your neighbors exist too

Yes, at first glance it may seem unappetizing, but think about it. If you get to know the people who live near you, you can easily start expanding your circle of friendships.. You just need to be friendly and introduce yourself politely. Surely they will like you and, if you have more or less similar ages or hobbies, they will invite you any day to have a beer in their apartment, or to go out partying... who knows!

4. Join an organization with which you can develop your hobbies.

We all have hobbies and activities to which we would like to dedicate more time. If you have a hobby, chances are you're not alone in the world.. Your job is to find an entity or organization with the same interest, and attend the meetings that are made. If you are a fan of video games, pottery, climbing, archery or scuba diving, you are sure to find people with the same passion and it will be very easy to start conversations and make plans with them.

5. NGOs and volunteering

If you want to help people with few resources, you can go to a volunteer center and carry out solidarity actions to improve the community. Not only is it a positive thing to contribute to these altruistic causes, but it will allow you to meet people with good values, people who are willing to lend a helping hand and who enjoy making new friends. You can make friends for life.

6. Any place is good

Okay, we've talked about especially good places to meet people, but let's be clear: any place is a good place for you to meet nice people and share good moments with them.. The most important thing is that you are open to this possibility.

The skills that will allow you to meet new people

We've already been talking about where to meet people, but we haven't had time yet to we haven't yet had time to explain what our attitude should be like if we want to open our social circle. if we want to open our social circle. We can all be more sociable, fun and outgoing, you just need to read on and apply these principles to your daily life.

1. It's okay to be nervous

Social skills experts often give the advice that when addressing strangers, you should come across as a confident person. Let's start busting this myth. If for whatever reason you're not a master of communication, you're not alone: 80 to 90% of the world's population also feels nervous when we talk to someone we don't know for the first time..

It's absolutely fine to be a little more nervous than usual. Keep in mind that your interlocutor is more likely to empathize with you if he or she notices that you're a little nervous, as we've all been there, and you'll come across as someone who is honest and not wearing masks or impostures. But that doesn't mean you should talk scared out of your wits: be at ease, show yourself as you are, and try to connect with the person you're chatting with. One trick to dispel nervousness is to focus on what the other person is saying and doing, so you're not so focused on yourself.

• Let's go deeper: "Top 10 tips to make a good first impression".

2. How to start? Introduce yourself

Well, of course, you're not going to sing a couplet at the first moment of the interaction, are you? Introducing yourself in a jovial and casual way is a good way to break the ice.. You can take the opportunity to politely ask the name of the person you are talking to. At that point you will already have a little confidence, but you need to try to be open and ask about what has encouraged you to start a conversation: "I love your dress, where did you buy it?", "You have very nice features, am I wrong if I say that you are from another city?", or even something more anodyne like "How was your day?" or "Why are you at this party?".

The important thing is not the whatbut the how. If you are pleasant and polite, any question is a good way to break the ice and continue to foster a good atmosphere.. Of course, it is not a good idea to say that you want to make friends, because you can put the other person in a compromise, and you will be transmitting quite a lot of neediness. Just be friendly and creative and the other person will want to keep getting to know you.

• Must-read: "10 tricks to be more sociable and fun".

3. Some questions and ideas to build the conversation.

But how to keep interacting; what to say to that person you just met? It's best to opt for contextual comments, that make reference to things that are happening in the environment you are in (how bad the music is (how bad the music at the party is, how funny the teacher in the next class is, the opinion you both have about the place...).

Some studies have shown that one of the best questions to start talking to someone is to ask them where they are from. That can trigger quite a bit of interest and feedback. Think about it: we all feel like explaining our story to someone who wants to hear it.

• More tips and tricks: "25 questions to get to know a person better".

4. Be a good "listener

Do you know what active listening is? It is important to show that you are interested in the person with whom you are having a conversation, and this is done by listening carefully.and this is done by listening attentively.

Also, don't forget that we all like to be reinforced in our beliefs and flattered. Without going overboard and without being false, it is good to remind your interlocutor of what you like about him or her. This is the easiest way to make him or her feel valued and comfortable.

5. What is it that links you to your interlocutor?

If your goal is to have a pleasant and fruitful conversation, it is normal to ask questions and respond to your interlocutor's answers. At some point you will realize that you have something in common: a hobby, the soccer team you follow, a TV series you both love, a TV program you can't stop laughing at... That's a good thing, and you can build on these commonalities to deepen the conversation..

You don't have to try to find common ground at all costs, it's something that will come quite naturally.

6. Say goodbye cordially and keep in touch.

If you've connected with the person you've met, you'll feel good and notice the words and good feelings flowing. and good feelings flow. Take the opportunity to ask for the contact (mobile number, e-mail...) so that you can contact him/her to see each other another time.

Keep in mind that you are not yet friends and it is better that the "second meeting" is in a public place and to do some activity that motivates you both, or just to have a drink on a sunny terrace. This way the other person will not feel pressured and will almost certainly accept.