How do vacations affect families and couples?

This is how vacations psychologically influence families and couples' relationships.

On most occasions, vacations are an element that has a positive impact on the emotional well-being and mental health of people, especially those who are active at work or academically throughout the year.

However, the holiday period is not without certain risks, potential problems that can arise under the right circumstances and that are supported by the change of routines and places that being on vacation attracts to our daily lives.. It is advisable to know them in advance to detect them quickly and not let them hinder our emotional relationships during those days of disconnection from work.

How do vacations affect family and couple relationships?

Sharing spaces, activities and free time all the time can sometimes lead to a crisis in couple relationships, which can even end in separation.. Something similar happens with family relationships, which can give rise to arguments and conflicts that end up becoming entrenched and generating resentment, defensive attitudes, etc.

The element that alters the coexistence and the emotional bond is not so much the fact of spending a lot of time together, but the abrupt transition between a stage of life in which each one has enough hours to be alone or with other people, to another in which one is with one's partner or family members almost constantly. It is a change to which each person must adapt more or less quickly so that problems do not arise, and this, in some cases, becomes a challenge.

But it is also true that it is not all disadvantagesVacations are an opportunity to strengthen bonds and to consolidate love and affectionate relationships. Therefore, here we will review the positive and negative effects that vacations can have on couples and families.

Potentially negative effects

These are some risk elements that, since the vacations, can trigger conflicts in family and couple relationships.

1. Poor management of joint activities

Differences in tastes, priorities and expectations mean that deciding what to do together can give rise to arguments and situations in which it is perceived that there is a clear "winner" and a clear "loser".This causes a crisis to appear both during the discussion and, if it has not been properly negotiated, at the stage when a decision has already been made and resentment appears.

2. Different levels of search for autonomy and solitude.

Vacations as a couple or with the family are a time for sharing, but also for disconnecting.and reconciling these times sometimes creates conflicts. Some people want to take advantage of the holiday period to be with their loved ones, others seek just the opposite to try to rest as much as possible and focus on their hobbies and interests, and between these two positions there is a wide gray scale.

3. Jealousy problems

If jealousy problems already existed in a couple's relationship, it is common for them to become more acute during the vacations, since there are more leisure contexts and a greater exposure to new places where there are new people.The relationship is more complex, since there are more contexts of leisure, and a greater exposure to new places in which there are new people.

4. Bad mood due to an altered sleep schedule

Many people have problems to rest adequately during the vacations, among other things because their biorhythms are altered.

When this happens, they are much more likely to feel irritable, with little patience and easily stressed, especially if they are frustrated for not being able to fully enjoy a vacation they had idealized in their imagination.

5. Frustration due to the need to take care of the children.

It is very common for parents with children to feel bad about not having those hours of the day when the little one is at school.

Add to this the social pressure to have the best possible vacations and the need to negotiate new parenting and caregiving duties. and the need to negotiate new parenting and childcare duties, it is not surprising that anger and arguments can easily arise.

Potentially positive effects

On the other hand, these are several effects through which the vacations can reinforce the relations in the family and the couple:

• Possibility of bringing more elements of enjoyment to travel if done as a family or couple, by creating anecdotes that can be remembered together.
• Opportunity to rethink and qualitatively improve life as a couple or as a family: to fix a garden, to go and meet distant relatives, to help a child decide which university career to pursue, etc.
• Opportunity to discover new facets, talents and hobbies of a loved one.
• Opportunity to improve communication skills and support for others, thanks to situations that demand it.

Would you like to have professional psychological help?

If you are interested in individualized psychological assistance or are looking for couple therapy or family therapy services, I invite you to contact me.

My name is Carolina MarinI am a psychologist federated by the Spanish Federation of Psychotherapists Associations (FEAP), and I have a professional career of almost 20 years offering help in the areas of emotion management, learning good communication strategies and conflict resolution and resilience in times of crisis. I offer face-to-face sessions in my office in Seville and online by video call.