How to live as a couple: 12 tips for living together properly
Tips on how to live together as a couple, with keys so that the love bond does not wear out.
Much has been written about life as a couple, and no wonder; living with the person we love is much more complex than it seems, among other things because of the intensity of the emotions involved in this process and the expectations they generate.
In this article we are going to review several keys about how to live as a couple and how to make the day to day life go smoothly without unnecessary arguments. In addition, we will review the concept of couple, explaining what it means to occupy this role.
What does it consist of to love in a relationship?
Getting involved in a relationship is mainly about knowing how to share intimacy, even if it sounds paradoxical. When we start a relationship with a partner, we will not only share our virtues with him/her, but we will also have to learn to live with this person within our comfort zone without the company of the person we love having a negative effect on our activities. It is important to know how to be present while respecting the other person's space.It is important to know how to be present while respecting each other's space, both in marriage and in a dating relationship.
Another important aspect of knowing how to live as a couple is communication: we must be good communicators to achieve understanding and avoid misunderstandings or the creation of expectations that will not be met.
When we begin to date a person formally, it is important to keep in mind that he or she had a life before meeting us: a stage in which he or she probably had a life before meeting us: a stage in which he or she probably had a life before meeting us: a stage in which he or she probably had a life before meeting us. personal projects and goals to be achieved that are alien to our existence..
Thus, ideally, we can help our partner in achieving his or her plans, motivating him or her and understanding that there are other important aspects in a person's life beyond the affective bond that unites you. The same applies to us, we should not neglect our personal aspirations.
Tips for living together as a couple
In the following lines we are going to see some practical advice that are effective for living together with our partner and maintaining a loving and respectful relationship..
1. Being able to live without your partner
The first point refers to the ability to remain functional even when we are not physically close to our sentimental partner; otherwise we would be engaging in a behavior of excessive emotional attachment, which is counterproductive to a healthy which is counterproductive for a healthy coexistence as a couple.
2. Principles are not negotiable
From the first moment, it is good to make it clear that our moral principles are not to be negotiated, but respected, and that the same is true for those of the other person.The same goes for the other person's principles. The healthy coexistence is born from the acceptance of the ideals of the other, even when these are not shared by the husband, the wife, the boyfriend or the girlfriend.
3. Loving in freedom
Healthy relationships are not possessive, on the contrary. The desire for the other to be happy transcends the desire to possess him or her, which implies that we do not act in a possessive way.This implies that we do not act to hold on to that person, but so that our presence brings him or her happiness, and his or her presence brings happiness to us.
If you are happy by their side, perfect, but if you no longer want to be there, then there is no point in being forced: this is something that works both ways.
4. Cultivate your own garden
This metaphor invites us that instead of striving to please our partner, we should strive to be a more pleasing person to ourselves. When we dedicate ourselves to cultivating ourselves and improving our most fundamental habits, the improvement in our relationships with our partners, with the establishment of a healthier coexistence, is only one of the consequences of our personal development. one of the consequences of our personal development..
5. Equality above all
A healthy couple's coexistence must be, above all, of an egalitarian nature.. Where some have more benefits than others, things end badly. Ideally, there should be a healthy balance between the demands of both partners.
6. Encourage mutual compensation
It is important that the partners are able to compensate each other. That is, instead of blaming the other person's shortcomings, these limitations must be complemented by providing support when necessary (as long as these limitations do not involve aggression and physical or psychological violence).
This speaks of a good level of empathy in the couple, since it is evidence that, when living together, these people are able to put themselves in the shoes of the loved one.
7. Avoid making an apology for the drama
It often happens that couples think that the more complicated the relationship is, the more meaningful it is. This is nothing more than a myth without any foundation.
The truth is that the more drama in the couple, the greater the likelihood that a dysfunctional dynamic will emerge in the relationship. in this love relationship.
8. Promote assertive communication
A fundamental key to achieve a good coexistence within the couple is to learn to communicate assertivelyWe can express our desires and feelings in a language of mutual respect, making sure that our words will not hurt our partner, but without leaving anything relevant unsaid.
9. Beware of "forever
The romantic thought that your relationship will be for life is often counterproductive and the only thing you get with it is to generate anxiety within the relationship.
The best thing to do is to live the moments and enjoy your relationship within the framework of mutual respect, without idealizing your partnerand not exaggerating with plans for the future. Try to stay focused on the here and now.
10. Do not take for granted that their interests match ours
Relationships should always offer the possibility for each person to express their disagreement. Therefore, it is important to to make frequent checks to make sure that the other person is comfortable with the routines and habits you have adopted. and habits of living together that you have adopted. The simple fact that you have been adopting these roles for a long time is not an argument in favor of them.
11. Learn to criticize
Where there is cohabitation, there are occasional clashes of interests; it is something normal and it is not a problem in itself. However, it is necessary to know how to manage these situations.
When it is time to discuss, it is necessary to learn to criticize people's actions, and not the people themselves.. This reduces the likelihood of unnecessary confrontation and encourages the other person to be more receptive to the possibility of changing his or her behavior.
12. Managing time together
Simply living together does not guarantee that you will have quality time in each other's company. Therefore, it is important that you make deliberate efforts to have hours of free time when you have nothing else to do but engage in activities with each other. This involves sitting down together, doing the math and making schedules work out.
(Updated at Apr 12 / 2024)