How to stop thinking about my ex-partner? 5 tips to achieve it.

Practical tips to stop thinking about your ex and reinforce your emotional discomfort.

The breakup of a relationship is usually a painful experience that, in many ways, can be described as a grieving process. That is to say, the end of the relationship can become, saving distances, something similar to the death of a loved one, for example.

Faced with this discomfort and emotional Pain caused by the breakup, there are many people who become obsessed with an idea to feel better: "How can I stop thinking about my ex?how to stop thinking about my ex?". In this article we will approach this question from the findings made from Psychology, many of which are put into practice in psychotherapy.

How to stop thinking about your ex: 5 practical tips

Just as every relationship is unique, the emotional consequences of a breakup are also unique, and vary depending on the individual.and vary from person to person.

Here come into play variables of both the personality of each person and the type of love bond and model of coexistence that came to maintain with his ex, as well as his life context (where and how he works, with whom he interacts daily, etc.).

That is why the best way to address these problems is to go to psychotherapy, because it can offer you tailored emotional management tools after studying your case.

However, if for the moment you have not decided to seek the help of a psychologist or you think that you do not feel bad enough to go to therapy, you can also benefit from some guidelines and strategies that can help you to stop thinking about your ex-partner.. You can see them explained below.

1. Assume that it is just a phase

First of all, get used to the idea that both the discomfort and the goal of stopping thinking about your ex-partner are part of a phase, It is not an experience that will define the rest of your life.. Remember that getting over the breakup correctly implies being able to evoke memories of that relationship and think about your ex normally, without suffering great emotional pain.

Having this clear helps to de-dramatize the situation and allows you to begin to turn the page.

2. Do not try to block thoughts and memories associated with your ex.

It may seem contradictory to try to apply this idea as a measure to stop thinking about your ex; however, it is not. The fact of not trying to block certain types of thoughts does not mean giving up thinking about something; in practice, is necessary to make it easier for our mind to focus on other things..

In fact, if you try to leave out of your consciousness certain ideas or mental images, you will actually be giving them more strength and power to come back to you again and again, and you will get the opposite effect to the desired one. What you must do is to accept that at first those memories and thoughts will be there, in the back room of your consciousness, generating in you a certain discomfort that you should not try to avoid at all costs. Simply let it fade and go away as it has come, without focusing your attention on your struggle against those emotionally painful mental contents.

3. Do not dedicate your time to goals and projects based on the assumption that it will come back.

Another basic tip to stop thinking about your ex is not to adopt a lifestyle built on the assumption that he or she will return. on the idea that sooner or later that person will come back to you (as a partner). (as a partner).

For example, there is no point in not thinking directly about someone for a while if you keep visiting certain places with the sole purpose of exposing yourself more to her or her social environment, favoring a reunion. Or if you continue working in a company only because that project allows you to continue earning money that you only need to carry out the family life plans that you had agreed upon.

4. Break with the dynamics of passivity

If you limit yourself to lamenting and "trying to heal" the emotional wound produced by the end of the relationship, it will take you longer to overcome the crisis.. It is important that you get involved in aspects of your daily life that give you experiences unrelated to the breakup and how bad it makes you feel. If you do not expose yourself to interesting stimuli, it is easier that the only thing you can focus your attention on are those memories of the relationship that has ended.

5. Maintain an active social life without obsessing about meeting potential partners.

In line with the previous advice, it is important to maintain an active social life, so you do not isolate yourself. But don't do it don't do it with the goal of finding another boyfriend or girlfriend that helps you stop thinking about your ex; in addition to harming that person, you will achieve the opposite effect, because everything in that relationship will constantly remind you of his or her reason for being.

If you are totally overwhelmed by the situation, go to therapy.

Finally, it is worth remembering the previous paragraphs: if nothing seems to work, there is still the most effective measure of all: go to psychological therapy. With the help of the psychologist you will have guidelines to know what to do with your emotions and memories, and it will even be easier for you to know if, in the first place, in your case, you have a problem.It will even be easier for you to know if, in the first place, the most useful solution in your case is to stop thinking about the ex.