’I over-justify myself’: possible causes and consequences of this behavior.

A summary of the causes and effects of the tendency to over-justify oneself to others.

Some people tend to give explanations for any action they take, no matter how small.

This constant justification may have a basiswhich we will try to explore in this article. Also, we will know which are some of the consequences of a conduct marked by the over-explanation of the reason of each decision taken by the person.

Why do I justify myself excessively?

We all know someone who has a certain tendency to explain the reasons why he or she has carried out a certain action, even if it really lacks importance. These individuals may come to ask, "why do I over-justify myself," a question that may have more depth than some may believe.

Over-justification of our actions may be generated for a variety of reasons.. To begin with, there is an important difference between a behavior that, by its very nature, either because it is unusual, because of its characteristics or because of the context, requires an explanation of it to other people so that they understand why, and other actions that may be routine and do not require such an additional account.

In the case of the former, it would be unlikely that a person would come to think, "I over-justify myself." However, if the individual tends to explain every behavior of the second group, we could speak of an excess of justification, which is the case we are referring to in this article.

This is the type of situation where you can observe that a person gives more explanations than necessary to justify his behavior, even when no one has explicitly asked the reason why he/she has acted in that particular way and not in another way..

It will be important, moreover, to establish a differentiation between a dynamic that fits into the "I justify myself too much" thinking and the fact of simply making excuses because of a behavior that for some reason is not accepted or involves some kind of conflict and therefore gives rise to the perpetrator trying to excuse himself in order to evade his responsibility, partially or totally.

Therefore, we have separated, on the one hand, the action of explaining a situation that, for whatever circumstance, requires it, and on the other hand, the fact of using excuses as a means of avoiding being judged for a controversial behavior. It is precisely the rest of the actions, the everyday ones, which do not need an explanation, that could be included under the condition of "I justify myself too much".

Causes of the tendency to over-justify

Once we have been able to clearly identify the type of behaviors that fit into this category, let's try to find out some of the causes that could be explaining this way of acting.

1. Lack of self-confidence

One of the most obvious could be a lack of self-confidence. When a person lacks sufficient self-confidence, he or she is likely to seek validation from others, is likely to seek validation from others on a constant, sometimes even exaggerated, basis.. That is the case with some people who think, "I over-justify myself." The problem with self-doubt is that it can lead to a series of negative emotions.

These can end up translating into anxious and depressive symptoms. The search for approval from other people, which they would carry out by means of this repeated justification, would be acting as an escape valve for these emotions. The problem is that, on the other hand, a dependency on such validation could develop.

In other words, people who fit into the "I justify myself too much" box could end up entering the vicious circle of justifying themselves out of low self-confidence and, by gaining the approval of others, justifying themselves even more in the future, which would make it difficult to eliminate this process.

On the contrary, it would be optimal for the person to do an adequate work to improve his self-confidence, with the help of a psychologist. with the help of a psychologist who is an expert in this matter.. Thanks to this process, this individual would be able to validate his own actions without the need for external acceptance, which would consequently reduce the number of justifications he would make for his actions.

2. Conflict avoidance

But there are other causes for which a person could present explanations so many times that he/she would come to think, "I justify myself too much". Another alternative might be to try to avoid conflict of any kind. Although somewhat related to lack of self-confidence, it is different enough to fall into a different category.

Therefore, this second cause would be conflict avoidance. A person who, for whatever reasons, either because of his or her base personality, learning history, or some traumatic event, has an aversion to conflict, will try to act all the time in such a way that they do not appear or are reduced as much as possible..

One of these tools could be over-justification, which would give rise to the phenomenon of "I over-justify myself". In this way, the person who would give exaggerated or repeated explanations could be doing so with the aim of making his or her peaceful intentions clear and thus not giving rise to the possible genesis of an argument, a misunderstanding or any other type of conflict.

As in the first case, this tendency could also generate a series of negative emotions in the individual, who would constantly live with the fear of being the architect of the conflict. the fear of being the architect of an incident with other people and not being able to manage it properly or fearing any other consequence. or fear any other consequence.

The possible solution would be to learn different strategies for coping with these situations, so as not to have to be constantly trying to justify each behavior and thus avoid annoying others. This work could be carried out by a psychologist specialized in social skills.

The therapist could teach this individual different tools for managing emotions and behaviors, with which she could learn to behave differently, feeling better about herself and obtaining satisfactory results, which would reduce this discomfort.

3. Fear of giving a bad image

Exploring a third alternative that could be the cause, or at least part of it, of the issue at hand, we come to the fear of giving a bad image. As before, in a certain way it is also related to low self-confidence, but in this case it manifests itself in a very particular way.

Focusing on this new cause, we would find a type of people who, among their characteristics, hide a fear of not being accepted or project a negative image of themselves, hide a fear of not being accepted or of projecting a negative image of themselves to others.. This trait pushes them to try to be exaggeratedly cordial, and even servile.

In order not to give rise to any misunderstanding, they will try to explain every action they intend to carry out, trying to ensure that their image is not undermined in the process. This issue is also linked to the claim of not generating conflicts that we saw as the second possible cause, since there may not be a single cause, but rather a combination of several, with a preponderance of one of them.

However, this attitude can have a paradoxical effect, caused by the phenomenon of over-justification. The intention of this type of individual is to over-explain themselves in an attempt to over-explain themselves to try to keep their image in the eyes of others as positive as possible.. However, this exaggeration of explanations could end up being striking or even annoying to some people.

It is this response that could cause precisely what the person fears most, which is a devaluation of the image he or she is giving to others. Even this reasoning can be one of the mechanisms that, as in the other cases, generates negative emotions and discomfort, by increasing the fear suffered and not knowing how to act to get it right.

As in the previous cases, one of the ways to get rid of this discomfort is to start a therapeutic process with a psychologist who can guide the person through different ways so that he/she can finally face the situations that previously generated anxiety and fear in a safe way.

Although these are some of the causes that could be behind the tendency to over-justify oneself, we must not forget that they are not the only ones, as there may be other different reasons and, as we have seen, even combine several of them, either highlighting some cause above the rest or in a more or less balanced way.