’I’m in a slump’: 3 tips to overcome that feeling

Tips to not let the feeling of being down paralyze you and lead you to self-sabotage.

Our moods are like a roller coaster: at some points we're up and at others we're down. Human beings experience a Wide range of emotions, including both positive and negative ones.

Joy, euphoria and happiness are emotions that we like to feel, while sadness, demotivation or listlessness are considered unpleasant.

When we say to ourselves "I'm in a slump", many see it as something bad, but it is actually totally healthy to feel it.But it is actually totally healthy to feel it, much more so than convincing ourselves that we should be happy all the time. Let's see why.

I'm in a slump: what do I do?

Our mood is never stable. There are times when we are more upbeat and other times when we feel more down. It may be only for a few hours, it may last a few days, weeks or even a few months, whatever the case may be, there will always be a moment, full of demotivation and sadness, when we say to ourselves "I'm in a slump".

Our illusions have been extinguished, we have no desire and we don't want to do anything at all. We are lazy about everything, but not because we are lazy or because we want to procrastinate a little bit.. No, it is a laziness of lack of humor, of "not now, I don't feel like it". A laziness that is neither selfish nor of rest, it is simply that there is no emotional or psychological strength to maintain the same pace we had before.

It is completely normal and healthy to feel this way from time to time.. We cannot feel joy 24 hours a day. Feeling sadness, lack of motivation and little desire to do things at some point in the day or for a few days in a row is a symptom that we are alive, and that we are not people trapped in a constant maelstrom of pathological euphoria. Everything that goes up has to come down, that's why in life there are many ups and downs. Do not despair, you are healthy.

The tyranny of happiness

If we do a quick search on how to be happy we will find a lot of articles, videos and even self-help guides detailing the strategies and steps to be happy for the rest of our lives. They promise us not to live a single second of sadness, they make us believe that it is a very bad emotion, detrimental to our health and our personal relationships. Being sad is bad, dysfunctional. Vade retro, sadness.

We live in a world in which negative emotions have been demonized.We can't ignore the fact that, however unpleasant they may be, they are necessary. As we said, they are a sign of good mental health, and we cannot pretend to hide or ignore our emotions. The tyranny of happiness promoted by self-help gurus and other apparently psychological currents have sold the idea that human beings need to be happy at all times, and that any "bad" emotion must be eradicated.

The problem with those who promote these ideas is that they offer strategies that are neither realistic nor work in the long term. Moreover, to be against the experience of negative emotions is to neutralize human nature itself. It is not possible to be happy in tremendously unpleasant situations such as the death of a family member, the loss of a job or when we break a leg. The idea that we must be happy in the face of adversity, always try to see the positive side of things and ignore the bad is anesthetizing our way of being.

It is for this reason that we are not going to talk about ways to avoid or get rid of the downturn. The idea is neither to eliminate this emotion nor to prevent it from happening again..

Tips for managing this feeling

Although it is possible to avoid feeling sad about some things in the future, it is normal to feel a little down from time to time and, far from fighting it, you should live it. It may be because of something we have done or because we simply woke up in a bad mood, but it is an emotion, and as such it will have its function, its importance in our life.

1. Accept the emotion

I am down, what is the first thing I do? Very often the first reaction to this emotion is to deny it. In order to do this we do everything to distract ourselves, fighting against this unpleasant sensation.. No one wants to feel sad, and it is logical that we try to get rid of the experience of this emotion as soon as possible.

But we should do just the opposite. Instead of ignoring the fact that we are down, we should accept what is happening.Isn't that strange? Although it may seem counter-intuitive, we must understand that when we talk about emotions, resisting them will only make them come back with more force when we pay attention to them in the future, making it more difficult to hide them.

In fact, one of the fundamental pillars of psychotherapy is that negative emotions come to the surface, that the patient re-experiences them in the consultation so that he/she becomes aware of them, accepts them, can identify them and, consequently, can work on them.

2. Leaning on our social relationships

Improving the quality of our social relationships has a direct impact on our happiness, helping us to better manage our negative emotions such as sadness or anger. Healthy friendships are a great motivator when we are going through a period of low mood, encouraging us to feel better without feeling bad.They encourage us to feel better without ignoring what has led us to be the way we are.

A good friend supports us by being there, listening to us tell them how our partner has left us, how we have been fired or what has happened to make us feel so bad. Whatever it is that has made us sad, he or she will actively listen to us, making us feel much better just by letting him or her know how we feel. He will not force us to be better by giving us empty advice like "don't forget to be happy".

Therefore, we must have other people we trust and who make us feel supported, which is essential to feel good. It is also worth mentioning that social relationships will help us to avoid falling even deeper, since loneliness can contribute to our slump even more.

3. Do not abandon our objectives

We have mentioned that we should live our emotions and not try to actively distract ourselves to hide these feelings. The best thing to do is to live them, but without this making us completely abandon everything that makes up our daily life, something that is quite common for us to do.It is quite common for this to happen to us when we are down.

Anybody has a bad day, and it is normal that on that particular day we do not want to continue with our project, whether it is to get in shape, learn a language or finish a career.

However, we must make an effort, and even focus even more on that goal. This is not trying to be distracted, but trying to be constant, to live the emotion but at the same time to live our life. We may need to take a break from time to time, but we should not hide behind the fact that we are not well enough to give up.

In case we continue with our projects despite being in a slump, we will be creating a very powerful precedent.. We will have created the memory in which we remember that, in spite of adversity, in spite of not being in the mood or in the mood, we were tenacious and continued doing what we wanted to achieve. We felt negative emotions, but it didn't stop us from being strong and moving forward. It is this mentality that will make us happy in the future, not the cheap self-help philosophy that we should be happy just because.

Differences between being depressed and having a depression.

In popular language it is common to say "estoy depre" to refer to being sad or depressed. It is difficult to fight against this expression and to try to educate everyone to stop using it in their everyday language, even if we allude to the fact that it may be disrespectful to compare having a bad day with having a psychiatric disorder that involves a lot of disability to the people who suffer from it. In any case, we recommend not to use it out of respect for those who suffer from depression.

It must be taken into account that clinical depression is a pathology, a mental disorder, something that implies a significant seriousness and a significant disability for people suffering from it.something that implies a significant severity and that no one wants to have. Depression is not adaptive, since those who suffer from it see significant areas of their lives such as family, employment, studies and even their hobbies severely impaired. A depressed person does not get out of a slump by trying to cheer up, playing a little sport or simply going out for a day of partying.

Depression is a dark and bitter companion that can plunge you into the deepest of sadness for years. It involves low mood over a long period of time, without a specific trigger. Among the symptoms that predominate in this condition we can find cognitive distortions, lack of initiative, suicidal thoughts and, above all and as the most characteristic symptoms, constant sadness and apathy.

A "slump" differs from clinical depression in its temporality and intensity.. Lows last a short time, at most a month, and are not at all as intense as a depression. This emotion does not invite us to be productive nor motivate us, but it does not imply a high degree of alteration and we can stop feeling it in a few minutes. Furthermore, being depressed does not prevent us from going on with our normal life, although we undoubtedly do not feel well.

What we must understand between the two is that depression requires psychological intervention for the patient to acquire the necessary tools to manage their psychopathology, improving their state of health and learning to overcome adversity. On the other hand, if we are suffering from a slump, it is not that it is not advisable to go to a psychologist, psychotherapy is always recommended, but it is a much smaller problem, which will surely fade away with the passage of time. The lows are only the valleys in the roller coaster of our life, and they always come before a rise, the joy.