Key questions to overcome relationship problems

Questions from which to rebuild a relationship in crisis.

We live in times of continuous changes by which sometimes we can be overwhelmed, as we are unable to adapt to them.We are living in times of continuous changes by which we can sometimes be overwhelmed, since we are not able to adapt to them. This is reflected on the people closest to us, not only co-workers or friends, but also on our closest people and that sometimes, having more confidence, takes the brunt of us at the end of the day. For example, our partner.

Faced with this phenomenon, I have prepared an article with a series of questions that we must be clear about in order to work on the problems that may ariseI am going to explain how to start changing your relationship situation.

Overcoming the main problems of couple: questions to ask ourselves

In our couple relationships we see ourselves pigeonholed on the basis of three foci or points of attention that control the future of this emotional bond. that control the future of this affective bond. These are:

• What we focus our attention on when we look at our partner.
• The decisions we make about what our partner's actions mean to us.
• The goals we have as a couple and how we focus to achieve them.

These are the building blocks of a relationship. How we deal with them will make that bond healthy. What determines what you become is not what is happening right now, what matters are your decisions about where you focus your attention..

The phases of truth

Many times we argue and find it hard to accept the truth about things we have done wrong. Has it ever happened to you that you throw something in your partner's face and she doesn't accept that it is true? Even though you know that it is, surely after talking about it more you can reach that agreement, but it will cost you a lot.

You may wonder why, and apart from the fact that your partner may be a square-minded person, I would like to tell you about the three steps that the German philosopher Arthur Schopenhauer explained in his day, in which he explains that every truth goes through three phases:

• First, it is ridiculed.
• Second, it is violently opposed.
• Finally, it is accepted as self-evident.

With this in mind, let us turn our attention to the important point that concerns us now, the questions we have to ask ourselves in order to focus our attention in such a way as to achieve logical solutions to our problems of life. logical solutions to our relationship problemsWith them we will achieve a point to change and we will be able to work on solving them.

Questions from which to strengthen a relationship in crisis

I would like for you to benefit from these questions, to sit down together and think about them, discuss them and argue them.

1. How are we going to end up if we don't change?

The answer is clear. You are going to break your union and all that goes with it.

2. What are we going to miss out on as a couple if we don't make this change?

A reflection on the opportunity cost of certain decisions. of certain decisions.

What is it already costing us mentally, emotionally, physically, financially and/or spiritually?

These arguments and frictions create a bad environment. I always believe that energy, whether positive or negative, fluctuates and converts, and therefore we must realize that a bad discussion today without resolving it can become a bad situation tomorrow, when we are on vacation and therefore produce an imbalance that will embitter our existence.

4. How would our family and friends feel if they saw us end our relationship?

The relationship also influences and is influenced by the immediate environment.We must be aware of this interrelationship.

The positive aspects of change

With the previous questions you have already seen what would be the negative consequences of not changing in the right direction. Now I would like you to look at the questions related to pleasure, in order to connect the positive ideas with the change.. For this I would also like you to take the opportunity to talk about them.

• If we change and make choices, how will that help us feel as a couple?
• How will this affect our day-to-day life?
• What could we achieve as a couple if we change this bad environment?
• What would our day look like today if we implemented the changes we want to make?

The key is to look for compelling reasons to support the change you want to make.realize that both of you are making mistakes in your behavior and above all that you are not each other's judges, but each other's life partner, and life is a constant change and learning. For this reason we have to adapt to the times that are coming and above all give the best of ourselves on a daily basis.

Couple problems? I can help you

If you are interested in improving your relationship and have an external help from a specialist in order to have an objective opinion, do not hesitate to contact me. We can start the sessions without moving from home and with a price appropriate to the times.

My name is Javier AresI am a General Health Psychologist and apart from providing my services to patients with anxiety and depression problems, my specialty is also couple therapy. With my help you will be able to solve the complications that have arisen from living together and regain the stability and happiness that made you to be together.

If it seems good to you we can start working on you, do not hesitate to contact me through this page.