Learning to feel good

A reflection on the psychological principles from which to learn to feel good.

The vast majority of clients who come to a psychologist's office do so because they feel bad. It is therefore logical that they are concerned about knowing whether it is possible to to learn to feel good on a daily basis.

And the truth is that yes, you can, but you have to know how. Because feeling bad, like so many other things in life, is a habit, a habit that we have learned and practiced without realizing it.

The ability to learn to feel good is a reality.

It may be due to something we have learned in our childhood and adolescence, in our family environment.

It may also be due to some kind of event, such as the loss of a loved one, an accident or an illness.

And it can also be due to a particularly hard or cruel past, something that we have had to live through and it is difficult to leave behind. It is usually something that seems to accompany us throughout our lives..

Sometimes it may be due to emotional deficiencies. Or to the lack of those skills that are necessary to relate to others and to ourselves.

And often, it is simply because we do not know ourselves we don't know ourselves and we live in a role that makes us feel empty..

Fortunately, over the years you learn that people are much stronger than you might think, and that when they put their minds to it and learn how to do it, they are capable of overcoming obstacles that seemed insurmountable.

• You may be interested in, "What is trauma and how does it influence our lives?"

The key is resilience

Over the years I have known people who have overcome terrible childhoods, traumatic events, painful experiences, enormous losses and emotional Pain of dimensions that are difficult to understand.

And the first question they ask at first is whether they will ever be able to feel good. Of course they will! But let's talk about it with caution.

If the aim is to have a continuous happiness in which the person is radiant and enjoying every hour of the day, it is important to know that this does not exist. It is not easy to make people see that continuous happiness is not a natural stateIt is not easy to make people see that continuous happiness is not a natural state, especially because everyone understands what happiness is in their own way.

If a person tells you that he can teach you to always feel happy, he is deceiving you. But it is another thing to learn how to feel good.

What to do?

Anyone who really wants to can learn to feel good most of the time, with a sense of well-being, of comfort, of being at ease in one's own skin.

But it takes time to get there, because it is neither real it is neither real nor healthy to try to change in a very short time a habit that we have been carrying along for almost all our life..

And one of the first steps is usually to clean up one's life: to eliminate situations, relationships and memories that hurt us and prevent us from moving forward.

It is also necessary to learn to change the reactions of tension, anger or sadness that for various reasons we tend to have automatically.

That is why it is necessary to have a trusting relationship with the psychologist: because it is scary to let go of what you know. it is scary to let go of what you know, no matter how bad it may be..

And it is very curious to realize that as you let go of some things, the inner feelings begin to change. And how the negative emotions to which we seemed condemned for life, begin to transform, little by little, at a pace that allows us to assimilate the changes.

And as strange as it may sound, many people need some time to adapt to the new pleasant emotions to which they were not accustomed.to which they were not accustomed.

Strange as it may sound, many people do not know what it is to live in a relaxed way, with joy and illusion.

These new emotions are precisely the new habit that will be implanted. And this is where the therapist will provide all the resources and techniques needed to make this well-being become a natural part of your life.

The good thing is that if the process is done well, in the right way, the change is gradual and can become very pleasant, as if it were an adventure in which new treasures are gradually discovered.

It is very common to see that people who have had a bad time and have begun to make this change, are becoming very wise people in front of our eyes, because when suffering is understood, assimilated and overcome, it becomes an excellent teacher of life..

And finally, the person who has made the emotional change, will possess a series of techniques and resources that will serve for life, because the process of improvement always continues, since in the end it is the person himself who becomes the architect of his own life.

But the best thing is that most people who have conquered their own well-being often say that they now have a much greater capacity to enjoy life than most other people do. than most people, because they already know what it's like to live in the dark. And we all know that the things you value and enjoy most are the things you achieve for yourself.

The truth is that these are profoundly human, beautiful processes of pure growth. Because there is nothing better than seeing how people improve their own lives and feel better and better.