Multiple births: how to deal with them?

Several key ideas on how to psychologically manage a multiple birth.

At first, the news that we are going to have more than one baby can be overwhelming. But, most naturally, this feeling of uncertainty and, why not say it, fear, extends not only throughout the entire pregnancy until delivery, but is maintained during parenting as well.

By definition, the term multiple birth refers to the presence of more than one fetus in the uterus. We are talking about the birth of twins, twins, triplets?

The illusion, joy and expectations of what our children will be like are intermingled with doubts, worries and fear. In reality, this accumulation of sensations is part of the whole process of parenthood. However, when this is multiple, it entails a series of particularities that need to be addressed.

And, suddenly, two come... or more!

Already from the beginning, in multiple pregnancy, specialized protocols are established and categorized as "high risk.". Without knowing anything else, this label is frightening and generates alarm.

It is true that it is important to know what the characteristics of a multiple pregnancy are, the risks, and to maintain the medical follow-up as indicated by the professional, but this label only indicates the distinctive quality of the pregnancy and the need for a specific type of supervision. the need for a specific type of monitoring. Pregnancy can develop in a completely natural way without complications.

As the time of delivery approaches, again all fears and insecurities come to the surface in their fullest expression, as well as excitement and joy.as well as the excitement and joy of, at last, meeting our babies. It is common to read and hear myths about multiple births, such as that it has to be by cesarean section, that babies are always born premature, that they will be underweight....

In the same way that we have discussed in pregnancy, in a multiple birth there are a number of singularities that need to be considered. Beyond this, there is no reason why there should be any problem or why it is essential to perform a cesarean section.

How to deal psychologically with a multiple birth?

In this article we want to reflect the reality of many multiple families and, in this way, also accompany them in the management of their experience, since there are few paragraphs dedicated to this situation. For this, we offer the following keys to face it in a healthy way.

1. Trust in medical professionals

As we have been commenting, multiple pregnancies and births have different characteristics, so that it is important to be informed and to know them, but also to enjoy the process you are going through..

2. Allow yourself to feel and express all the emotions and thoughts you experience.

Parenting is surrounded by contradictory and intense feelingsIt is normal to have fears and moments of great stress, as well as excitement and joy.

3. Be flexible

Like any life event that is surrounded by uncertainty, multiple pregnancy is subject to variables that we cannot handle or that do not depend on us. While it's good to have a plan for how you would like things to go, the final outcome may vary. It is important to look at change as a possibility and that it does not have to be negative..

4. Lean on the people around you.

Our social circle is very important, both for the logistics of feeding, dressing or supporting more than one baby, as well as for the management of the household and on an emotional level.

There are associations that can provide you with information and answer any questions you may have.. But they are also a source of support, where you can share your experiences and learn from each other.

5. Don't forget about yourself

Self-care is essential to maintain a regulated and balanced state.

6. If the situation overwhelms you, go to psychotherapy.

Ask for professional help if you think you need it, it is totally valid to do so..

Author: María Espinosa del Olmo, General Health Psychologist and member of Centro TAP.