Social-emotional skills: characteristics, functions and examples.

These skills act as a link between emotion regulation and communication.

Social-emotional skills are an aspect that, historically, little work was done at school despite the fact that they are fundamental for us to be socially adjusted individuals as adults.

There are many skills of this type, all of them very useful and that need to be enhanced in order to be able to relate in a well-adapted way with the social environment.

Next we will see this concept in more depth, in addition to discovering a few useful socioemotional skills and how to work on them.

What are social-emotional skills?

We could define social-emotional skills as those learned behaviors that we carry out when we interact with other people and that are useful for us to express our feelings, attitudes, opinions and defend our rights.attitudes, opinions and to defend our rights. For example, among them we can highlight self-knowledge, self-control, empathy or the ability to collaborate with others.

Developing these types of skills is very important, since they help us to relate assertively and functionally with others, as well as helping us to achieve our goals in a social context from which we cannot separate ourselves.

Although there is no strict classification as to what types of social-emotional skills there are, we can classify them into more basic skills, such as can be classified into more basic skills and more complex skills..

Basic skills can be understood as those that are relatively simple, but fundamental for acquiring more complex skills. Among them we could highlight being able to listen, to maintain a conversation, assertiveness, to say thank you, to introduce oneself? while in the complex ones we would have, for example, taking the initiative, setting goals or resolving conflicts.

Social-emotional skills in childhood

Social-emotional skills can be worked on at any age, however, it is during childhood that they are most productive to acquire them.. It is well known that when we are children it is easier for us to automate certain types of behaviors and acquire new knowledge. Among these behaviors and knowledge can be included social-emotional skills and for this reason childhood is such an appropriate period to be able to teach them.

In addition to the family environment, the school exerts a great influence on the behavior and personality of the individual.. It is in this place where not only new academic knowledge is acquired, but also where different socioemotional skills can be put into practice, especially by interacting with other classmates. For this reason, educational centers, under a more modern educational perspective and not so focused on the cognitive, have been incorporating into the academic curriculum the implementation of various social and emotional skills.

Failure to acquire socioemotional skills such as self-control, assertive communication, conflict resolution or empathy can be a problem for the child as an adult. In adulthood it is all very well to have in-depth knowledge of a particular subject, but it is of little use if you do not have the social-emotional competencies to express them or relate to them. to be able to express them or relate to others.

• You may be interested in, "What is Emotional Intelligence?"

Types and examples

There are many socioemotional skills that we could highlight, but the fundamental ones are described below.

1. Resilience

Resilience is a fundamental ability in every person, since it is what makes us suffer more or less in the face of an adverse situation, such as difficult, stressful or traumatic events.

This ability is fundamental to the extent that no one has a perfect life.. We all go through ups and downs at some point in our lives, so it is necessary to learn to manage them and, to the extent that it is in our hands, to learn to cope with them.

For example, having good resilience means that, in case our parents get divorced, we break up with our partner or our sisters tend to embitter our existence, we will have and recover the physical and mental energy to overcome the bad time.

2. Self-knowledge

Self-knowledge is the ability to know oneself, both cognitively and emotionally. In other words, it is the ability to know what we are feeling at any given moment, to make realistic evaluations of our own abilities and to know what we are good at and what we have difficulties with.

This skill combines aspects related to emotional intelligence, specifically intrapersonal intelligence, and also cognitive aspects, especially metacognition.

3. Tenacity

Tenacity or perseverance is the ability to continue working towards the achievement of a goal that we have set ourselves, in the medium or long term. We persevere when, despite not having the desired results, we continue working to achieve our goal.

4. Social awareness

Social awareness is the understanding that others are also feeling things and being able to adopt different perspectives when interacting with them. To be socially aware is to understand that we are not alone in the world and that, just as others have obligations and rights, so do we.

5. Collaboration

Collaboration is the ability to coordinate with others to achieve a common goal, beneficial to all. It is not only to achieve a specific goal, such as working in a work group to obtain a passing grade or finish a project, but also to collaborate in order to have a proper coexistence. It is to cooperate so that we all feel well together.

6. Empathy

Empathy is widely known as the ability to put oneself in the place of others and synchronize with their emotions. It is to experience what others are feeling and is clearly a capability closely related to emotional intelligence, of an interpersonal type.

7. Self-management

Closely related to self-knowledge, we understand as emotional self-management the ability to identify our emotions and use them as drivers to reach a goal. identify our emotions and use them as drivers to reach an objective.. It is learning to be aware of the need to delay rewards to achieve our goals, and to develop perseverance to tolerate frustration.

We can manage positive emotions and negative emotions. If we are happy we can use that good mood to continue studying for an exam or talk to a friend. If we are angry, instead of taking it out on someone close to us we can manage it by channeling our anger by going for a run or, if we know someone who can listen to us, talk to them so we can let off steam, peacefully.

8. Responsible decision making

Although it is perhaps still complicated during childhood, educating in correct decision making can be a fundamental aspect for the child, once he or she has reached adulthood, to behave in a controlled and well-adapted manner.

Throughout life, there are many situations in which we have to decide which path to take.. One may involve more risks than the other, but also more benefits. Learning to decide correctly, based on more or less objective criteria and not based on impulses, can be a good way to avoid unpleasantness in the future.

For example, a good decision making is deciding not to start Smoking when a friend invites us for a cigarette, or deciding to avoid drinking alcohol during the week. In these decisions, the decision to have good health has prevailed over social pressure.

9. Assertive communication

Assertive communication is a very useful communication style for any situation, given that it is the learning to communicate what we want to say without being shy about it.. Each person has the right to express him/herself and, as long as it is done with respect and tolerance, each person can assert his/her opinion.

10. Personal relationships

Socioemotional skills have a clear component related to emotions and being used with social purpose.. The most useful purpose of these skills is their application when relating to others.

Learning to introduce oneself, to talk to others and to interact in a friendly way are fundamental aspects if one wants to have an adaptive relationality and to be a socially adjusted individual. We cannot have friends if our communicative and relational style is passive-aggressive, or does not invite a good conversation.

How to develop them?

As we have already mentioned, it is very important to focus on enhancing social-emotional skills during childhood. Whether in the family or at school, children should learn how to relate to others in an appropriate way, as well as how to manage their emotions for beneficial purposes, such as achieving goals.

Education should focus on and have, as its main function, the social adaptation of the individual. This involves fostering their integration into society, interacting with others, developing different ways of feeling, thinking and acting. All of this is fundamental in order to end up being a well-adjusted individual upon reaching adulthood.

But although we should try to encourage as many socioemotional skills as possible, it is true that teaching should focus on those skills that are most likely to be useful in the individual's life, both in the short and long term.both in the short and long term.

Por ejemplo, la empatía y la colaboración son habilidades que deben tener cierta prioridad antes que la tenacidad o la resiliencia, especialmente durante preescolar y primeros años de primaria. Es más tarde cuando esas dos habilidades se pueden introducir, como finales de la primaria.

Referencias bibliográficas:

• Zins, J.E., Elias, M.J., Greenberg, M. T y Weissberg, R.P (2000). Promoting social and emotional competence in children. En K. Minke y G. Bear (Eds.), Preventing school problems.promoting that work (pp. 71-100). Bethesda: National Association of School Psychologists.
• Lickona, Thomas. (1992). Educating for Character: How Our Schools can Teach Respect and Responsibility. Batan Books, New York, USA.
• Shields, A., Dickstein, S., Seifer, R., Guisti, L.,Magee K.D., & Spritz, B. (2001). Emotional competence and early school adjustment: A study of preschoolers at risk. Early Education and Development, 12, 73-96.