The 3 types of perfectionism and how they affect us

There are different ways of being a perfectionist, and their psychological effects differ greatly.

The human being has always been a very competitive animal, but the circumstances in which we live seem to be accentuating this trait. The increasing demands imposed on us in areas such as academia and the workplace are a good example of this, fostering an insatiable and exhausting desire to excel.

Society encourages the pursuit of success and excessive ambition.and even many parents and teachers directly convey this message to children practically from the moment they enter this world, so that they develop, driven by the desire to "excel" in the facets they judge to be most relevant.

This is the "seed" of perfectionism, which is planted in the fertile soil of an environment that promotes it, and which feeds on messages that we receive over time. In the end, a timid plant sprouts, which directs its branches to the fleeting light of acceptance (of itself or others), but which soon grows and becomes a creeper that is very difficult to get rid of.

The aim of the present article is to delve into the types of perfectionism and the way in which they are expressed. Finally, a brief review of the basic characteristics of maladaptive perfectionism will also be made. With this it is sought to understand a problematic that every day affects more people.

What is perfectionism?

Perfectionism is an attribute that is usually understood in two very different ways: either as a virtue that leads to excellence, or as a defect that drags us down to frustration and failure. It is expressed as the determination of high personal standards that can become difficult to achieve; or as the tendency to evaluate oneself or others in a highly critical and negative way. All this ends up translating into hypervigilance in the face of any possible error, which diminishes the spontaneity of our actions.

Although perfectionism is not perfectionism is not considered by itself a pathological traitHowever, its contribution as a factor of vulnerability to multiple psychopathologies has been proven, among which mood, anxiety and eating disorders stand out. Unbridled perfectionism can involve an extraordinary rigidity that conditions life and emotions to the point of "damaging" those who make it their own. From the total inability to recognize fallibility (one's own and/or that of others), to well-being subordinated to self-control or hypervigilance, these are all very frequent examples of the harmful tendencies of clinical perfectionism.

On the other hand, there are also authors who do not conceive perfectionism as a problem or inconvenience, at least when it conforms to a series of parameters. Thus, adaptive and disadaptive forms of perfectionism have been described, adaptive and maladaptive forms have been described, depending on the specific way in which goals and concerns interact.. When both are high, an exaggerated imposition arises that torpedoes the life project, but if ambitious goals are reconciled with a healthy way of approaching them, a constructive balance is achieved. In this case we would speak of the adaptive modality.

Research on the latter confirms that adaptive perfectionism is linked to an intense sense of fulfillment with respect to existence, and that it is also a protective factor against a Wide range of emotional problems. Pathological perfectionism, for which high goals and worries (both) converge, is related to the opposite: life dissatisfaction and increased risk for psychological suffering.

In addition to this distinction between adaptive and maladaptive, perfectionism has also been classified into three subtypes according to the way it manifests itself. Let's get to know them a little better.

Types of perfectionism

Three different forms of perfectionism have been described, depending on who is the recipient of its influence (self or others) and the origin of the self-imposed demands. They are not mutually exclusive, and the same person is likely to present several at the same time. Their characteristics and effects will be discussed in more detail below.

1. Self-oriented

Self-oriented perfectionism is the one that most closely resembles the commonly held idea of what this trait is. It involves the rigid imposition of goals and methods that must be adhered to in order to perform the tasks at hand. to perform the tasks for which one assumes responsibility, and on the basis of which one's image of who we are is built. That is why, in this case, the criterion of self-evaluation is located at an unassumable point; although it only applies to the subject who presents the attribute, and not to the others.

When this trait is related to low preoccupation, and is therefore adaptive, it usually leads to extraordinary performance.. But if it occurs with difficult emotional reactions, it can condemn the "sufferer" to constant states of despair and poor personal self-realization, regardless of the achievements attained.

2. Oriented towards others

In this case, perfectionism implies rules that do not apply to the person who designs them, but are projected only to his or her social environment.. Those who present this subtype impose on others how they should act, demanding levels of performance that become overwhelming and generate overwhelming stress. In such a case, they usually assume, with or without reason, a position of privilege that evolves into tyranny and is not governed by democratic principles. It is common in cluster B personality disorders, such as narcissistic or antisocial.

In its adaptive version (which lacks any anxious component), the nuance of emotional empathy is added to relationships with others, from which follows good leadership skills. However, a certain horizontality in communication would be required, despite maintaining a clear hierarchical structure.

3. Socially prescribed

Socially prescribed perfectionism is a subtype that is closely linked to interpersonal anxiety. is closely linked to interpersonal anxiety.. In these cases, the person who lives with it assumes high standards without their own initiative, but rather because of the belief that it is what others expect of him or her. It involves two distinct processes: a misperception of others' expectations and an attitude of obedience to them. This perfectionism is related to a low assertiveness, as well as to a cervical panic of abandonment or rejection.

Of all the subtypes described here, is the one that most frequently precipitates problems in the area of psychic health, especially anxious symptoms.especially anxious symptoms. It is also often the social substrate of personality disorders included in cluster C, especially the dependent one.

How is maladaptive perfectionism expressed?

We will now review the basic characteristics of maladaptive perfectionism, or in other words, the way in which it is expressed and suffered. It is in this case that we speak of the trait as a problem that requires clinical attention, since its consequences can be dramatic for affective health and quality of life.

1. High standards

Extremely perfectionistic people set very high goals for themselves that are sometimes difficult to achieve in the short termThis often makes them a common source of frustration and pain. They extend to almost all areas of daily functioning, although they are especially common in work and academics.

In the end, these are "ideal models" of behavior/thought that detract from naturalness and add a forced component to day-to-day activities. The way in which the person perceives him/herself and his/her practical skills (self-esteem/self-efficacy) would be associated with such subjective norms, being damaged as a direct consequence of their dissatisfaction.

2. Preoccupation with making mistakes

Extremely perfectionistic people tend to be constantly vigilant about the possibility of making mistakes, which prevents them from fully enjoying what they spend their time doing. While some degree of caution a certain degree of caution is common for the result of an action to be optimal, too much caution leads to a constant checking of the results.If this is excessive, it leads to a recurrent checking that does not produce an objective improvement in the final product, but rather the sacrifice of many cognitive resources and an unfathomable feeling that something is "not quite right". At the end of the process, the emphasis on the negative outweighs the appreciation of the positive.

3. High expectations

Perfectionists expect the results of their actions to be equivalent to the investment they make, ignoring in the process all the confounding variables that may contribute to them. Because the world is not always fair in the way it rewards/punishes, it is not uncommon for unfavorable consequences to be interpreted as an unacceptable failure that undermines self-image. The fact is that there tends to be a strong, stable and general internal attributionThis is the reason why it is often difficult for them to work in a group (since it is a context where they do not control everything).

4. Parenting styles

A review of the life history of the overly perfectionistic person usually leads to a pattern of family interaction characterized by rigidity and reinforcement restricted to achievement. These are styles marked by righteousness and extreme demands; in which positive behaviors are usually ignored, as they are judged as "normal". Deviation from an exemplary standard imposed by the parents, sometimes without detailing why, brings with it penalties of all kinds. of all kinds. As time goes by, these norms would be integrated as their own and would condition the way the person treats himself/herself.

5. Harshness in self-judgment

All of us embrace a discourse in our inner selves regarding the way events happen. For example, in a difficult situation, we may try to fuel our powers of self-improvement by telling ourselves such things as "I'm sure everything will be all right" or "It's not as bad as it seems".

However, those who are overly perfectionistic are always faced with a titanic task, which requires massive investment of time and energy. a titanic task, which requires the massive investment of all their energies.. That is why when the expected purpose is not achieved, their discourse becomes extremely harmful to the inner life (dissonance between effort-result). When it is achieved, on the other hand, only mental silence or temporary relief is observed.

6. Excessive organization

Maladaptive perfectionism translates into a negative perception of the problems that occur in daily life, which are valued as a threat to the image that one wishes for oneself. This entails a risk of a risk of a discrepancy between the ideal self and the real self.This would be interpreted as absolutely catastrophic. In order to avoid such a circumstance, it is common to opt for an exhaustive prior preparation; that is, for an excess of organization and planning. This is why activities that others carry out without difficulty can become "uphill" for those who live with this trait.

Bibliographical references:

• Besser, A., Flett, G. and Hewitt, P. (2004). Perfectionism, Cognition, and Affect in Response to Performance Failure vs. Journal of Rational-Emotive and Cognitive-Behavior Therapy, 22, 297-324.
• Slaney, R., Pincus, A., Uliaszek, A., & Wang, K. (2006). Conceptions of Perfectionism and interpersonal problems: Evaluating groups using the structural summary method for circumplex data. Assessment, 13 (2), 138-53.