The fear of saying ’no’ at work

Making progress at work is not about saying 'yes' all the time; you have to set boundaries.

The fear of saying "no and to set limits is one of the great difficulties and learning that we encounter in relation to our personal development, be it in the personal, sentimental or work-related areas.

What does not saying "no" or setting clear limits between what you want and what you don't want, between what you can and cannot do, and also between what you know and what you don't know? And above all, how to overcome this difficulty?

The problems when it comes to saying "no" in the work context.

One of the first words that the human being learns is "no". This word is sometimes associated with a negative meaning, but in reality setting limits is an essential condition in your life to achieve well-being. The "no" helps us to set limits, to know ourselves, to build a solid personality where we know what we wantwhat we want, what we don't, what we can do, where we need more help or directly what we cannot do (limits are also necessary for personal development).

One of the most common problems today is to consider that growing as a person or professional consists of overcoming all your limits.. But we are human beings, and having limits is part of our humanity and nature. The right thing to do is to be aware of what those limits are. However, if the rest of the world does not know your limits because you do not communicate them, what does that lead to?

On a personal level, not saying no or not communicating your limits leads you to feel that you do not live your own life, but rather that your life is conditioned by the limits of others. that your life is conditioned by the decisions of others.. Not setting clear boundaries, expressing what you really think, feel and need, and what you don't want, leads to a state first of frustration, later of helplessness, and finally of discouragement.

In the professional sphere, everything can be intensified even more. By not making decisions, we end up feeling increasingly insecure and lacking in self-esteem. By not saying no, it can be possible to accumulate work that does not belong to us, which leads to more stress, anxiety, fatigue, and therefore discouragement and demotivation for work (sometimes even fear). (sometimes even fear).

Work can be an experience of achievement, learning and well-being or a heavy daily burden. It all depends on how you communicate your limits. Sometimes not setting boundaries also means that others may cross the line. means that others may cross the line and cause you discomfort..

In this video I'm going to tell you what is the main origin of the problem of saying no and limits and how you can start to solve it. Press play!

The importance of setting clear boundaries

Saying "no", communicating boundaries or communicating assertively is actually very simple. The problem is what's stopping you. What prevents us from communicating assertively and setting boundaries is first and foremost fear..

We are afraid of the response, afraid of lack of acceptance and appreciation, afraid of risk, afraid of losing. But fear is not the problem (as it is a useful and necessary emotion to protect your life) but how you understand and manage your fears and emotions.

In the last 10 years as a psychologist and coach I have accompanied people in their personal and professional change processes, and in the vast majority of cases there was a fear of saying "no" that needed to be solved. When you live a process of change and the change happens in you, starting to set limits becomes more and more a habit.. Work decreases, you become more organized, personal relationships improve, you get to know yourself better and you begin to feel that work is a lighter experience.

Assertive communication is not just saying "no", it is much more than that. It is communicating in an essential way. It is telling the truth, what you think, what you feel and need, and also what you cannot or do not want to do.

Do you need support?

In empoderamientohumano.com you can find some free resources to start living this process of change, such as the Emociónate program, or even schedule a first free exploratory session with me to get to know each other, detect where the problem is, what the solution can be, and above all see how I can accompany you in this process of change so that, thanks to your own personal change, everything else changes forever.

What happens to us is a result of what we do, how we interpret it and how we manage the emotions we feel. For this reason the only possible change is the one that happens in you. Because from you change actions, interpretations and above all you learn to have emotions on your side instead of against you.