The importance of what we tell ourselves in managing discomfort

Self-instructions are an important resource for managing unpleasant emotions.

One of the contributions that the cognitive current made to the field of psychology in the 1960s highlighted the relevance of the internal role of the individual as an essential element in the regulation of behavior.

Thus, it began to be considered that the way a person perceives, processes, interprets, stores and retrieves information become fundamental phenomena that guide one's own behavior towards the achievement of particular goals and objectives.

From these considerations arose, among other things, what we know today as self-instructions used in the context of applied psychology.

The cognitive approach in psychology

By considering the cognition component as an active agent of the individual's behavioral response, the development of various models, theories and techniques of psychological intervention began as a counterpoint to the behaviorist approach, which held that behavior was modified only on the basis of environmental and external factors.which held that behavior was modified only on the basis of environmental and external factors.

Among the most innovative of these postulates, several stand out. On the one hand, Albert Bandura's theory on Social Learning, which has had a very significant importance in the application of cognitive-behavioral psychological interventions oriented to Social Skills Training.

In second place also stands out the Rational Emotive Behavioral Theory the Rational Emotive Behavioral Theory of Albert Ellisa type of intervention focused on addressing irrational beliefs that has proven its effectiveness in therapies for depression or anxiety.

Thirdly, we find Aaron Beck's Cognitive Therapya therapy that works on cognitive distortions, automatic thoughts; or, more specifically, the technique proposed by D'Zurilla and Goldfried for Problem Solving in which a series of phases are proposed to effectively face decision making.

Finally, it is also worth mentioning the fundamentals of Donald Meichembaum's Self-Instructional Trainingwhich defends the usefulness of adopting an internal discourse and a type of effective self-talk in order to facilitate coping with possible adverse or complicated personal situations. With regard to this last strategy, a series of specific guidelines for the practical application of this type of psychological resource are offered below.

Cognition as a behavior regulating factor

Observing aspects such as what goes through the person's mind in a given situation or experience, the level of awareness of his or her beliefs, the type of reasoning he or she does, the conclusions and ideas he or she generates in this regard... all of this allows us to determine more accurately the type of messages or internal discourse that is being conveyed by the person. all this makes it possible to determine more accurately the type of messages or internal discourse that the person uses to that it puts into practice for the control of its own actions.

All this has a significant impact on the emotional experience and modulates to a large extent the capacity for effective psychological management, since phenomena such as core beliefs and personal schemas, expectations, cognitive evaluation of personal events, decision-making in conflict resolution, the factors to which the individual attributes the occurrence of the situations he/she experiences... can result in the experience of significant emotional distress if they are not elaborated in a functional and adaptive way..

How to apply the technique of self-instructions?

In the same way that it happens when taking practical driving lessons in which the teacher offers indications on the steps to follow to drive the vehicle, when a new or difficult situation to handle is in front of you, the manifest instructions that the person perceives are very useful to face such situation in a more competent way and, therefore, to achieve an adequate level in the handling of the vehicle. to achieve an adequate level in the management of the emotions of discomfort that such an event may provoke..

In the application of the technique in the field of cognitive-behavioral psychological therapy, it is the professional who guides the patient first in the identification of the kind of internal discourse that the latter tends to use, as well as in the detection of messages that interfere negatively blocking the execution of the behavior and favoring unpleasant emotional responses ("you do everything wrong" or "you are useless") and, finally, in the internalization of other types of messages that enhance personal self-confidence ("if I make a mistake, I can learn from it" or "when I am calmer I can express myself more clearly").

The therapist's help is initially greater, since at the beginning he/she is the one who proposes these instructions externally, The aim is for the patient to learn to be more autonomous and to put into practice the use of these positive messages on his or her own. on their own.

In order to implement this psychological strategy, effective self-instructions can be generated by analyzing and responding to a series of questions at the different moments of coping with the situation: before performing the behavior, during the behavior and after having faced it. Below, several examples are specified to be applied in each of them:

Self-instructions before performing the behavior 1.

• What do I have to do and what goal do I want to achieve?
• What is going to help me to achieve it? What is not?

2. Self-instructions during the performance of the behavior

• What am I paying attention to?
• How do I feel about having to deal with this situation? From one to ten, how intensely?
• What is enabling me to achieve my goal? What is not?

3. Self-instructions after performing the behavior

• How do I feel about having been able to perform the behavior?
• What aspects of my performance make me proud?
• What can I learn for next time?

Characteristics of self-instructions

In terms of What aspects should be considered and included in the content of self-instructions?The following principles stand out.

It is important that the messages are rational, realistic and avoid cognitive distortions, which are defined as irrational, biased or negative ideas that impair the performance of an adaptive psychological response.

These include dichotomy (reasoning in absolute and extreme terms "I always block myself"), anticipation (drawing conclusions based on potential assumptions and rigid expectations "I'm sure I'm wrong"), self-attribution (attributing the behavior only to internal factors without considering other more circumstantial or external factors "if I don't do it correctly it is because I am not good at it") or selective abstraction (focusing only on the negative aspects and disregarding the neutral or favorable ones "although this part has not gone completely wrong, it has been a failure because I have failed in this other part".

Another fundamental aspect lies in that the self-messages foster a perception of sufficient capacity and confidence to face the situation in order to achieve an adequate perspective of overcoming the situation. Thus, phrases such as "I am capable of..." or "I can cope with such a situation", etc., can be useful.

On the other hand, it is important to stop and eliminate excessively self-critical and self-demanding messages that often prevent the acceptance of one's own mistakes and difficulties in a natural way. In this sense, it is important to avoid focusing self-instructions on expressions such as "I should have done... this way" or "I should not have done... this way", etc.

It is important to orient self-verbalizations towards phrases that organize the behavior through sequential behavioral steps, as internal action plans.(e.g., "first I will ..., then I will start to ..., finally I will do ...").

By way of conclusion

Throughout the text we have been able to see how important it is to be aware of the type of internal to be aware of the type of internal discourse used in coping with potentially complex or anxiogenic events.This becomes an essential factor in the self-regulation of individual behavior. As soon as the person is able to identify the distorted or irrational messages that he/she addresses to him/herself and can replace them with more realistic and comprehensive ones, the approach adopted in the response he/she gives can enhance his/her level of behavioral competence and favor the management of the discomfort generated in a difficult situation.