Unhealthy Jealousy: 10 Common Signs of Overly Jealous People

What do overly jealous people look like and how can we help them?

Relationships are often complicated. At the beginning of courtship, everything is rosy, the chemicals of infatuation are in full feast and we feel invaded by positive feelings.

However, and depending on some circumstances that we will try to explain, it is common to see how many couples degrade and even break up because of a very common problem: Jealousy..

What is jealousy?

In the field of couple relationships, jealousy is a feeling of insecurity, jealousy are feelings of insecurity and anguish that invade one or both members of a sentimental couple when a series of situations occur. when a series of situations occur. This negative feeling can arise when they feel that the love of the other person is in danger, or when they fear that they are no longer the center of attention of the loved one.

By extension, all interpersonal relationships can be affected by jealousy.. We can find examples of situations of jealousy that occur even in adult life: "my mother spends more time with my sister, she has always been the favorite" or "my best friend asked someone else out when I was her best friend".

As we can see, not all jealousy comes from romantic partners, but it is true that it is much more common among boyfriends and girlfriends.... In fact, jealousy is a recurring problem in psychological consultations with couples.

The side effects of jealousy (and how to deal with them)

Situations like this can occur much more frequently than we imagine, generating feelings of anger, irritability and rivalry between the parties involved. Sometimes we use the wrong ways to reinforce our sense of worth, and we also have a certain difficulty in accepting the presence of other sources of gratification (other than ourselves) in the life of the loved one. These are elements that can generate the necessary breeding ground for jealousy to emerge..

However, in most cases, these situations are usually resolved without major complications, since it is assumed that in adulthood we have developed a series of emotional tools that allow us to channel these unpleasant feelings towards more adaptive responses. Most people are able to relativize this feeling and put it in context, but there are other people who, for one reason or another, are invaded by the feeling of discomfort caused by jealousy, without being able to control it.

The good side of jealousy

It is worth mentioning that, on occasion, jealousy can be useful.Is this possible? Yes, because in certain situations jealousy can allow us to turn on an alert in our mind in case we are living real situations that require a series of actions to ensure the stability of the relationship with that loved one. For example, jealousy can be a sign that something is going on, and that perhaps there is a third person who is really getting involved in our love relationship.

Jealousy would thus be an advantage when it comes to ensuring that certain reasonable doubts are present in our decision making and do not make us act blindly because of the love or affection we feel for the other person. However, it should be noted that jealousy alone does not guarantee that we will judge what happens to us rationally: other capacities are needed for that.

When is it harmful?

Is jealousy potentially harmful to our emotional well-being? In general, these feelings manifest themselves in an uncontrolled manner, are irrational, without objective basis and therefore harmful.. These are the unhealthy jealousyThese are the unhealthy jealousies, which can really destroy interpersonal relationships, and which are a problem for the psychological well-being of the person who suffers from them.

Unfortunately, there is the erroneous belief that when a person feels jealousy for his loved one, it is because he loves him very much.. This is a blunder that can generate dangerous dynamics and worsen the situation. In fact, it is easy to hear phrases like: "if he is jealous of you, it is because he is very much in love". This kind of conception about jealousy can be a bad start for a relationship, because couple love must be sown in freedom to allow both partners to grow and flourish; jealousy only suffocates the relationship, to the point of making it unbearable.

Signs that warn us that someone is jealous

The following are the most frequent symptoms that indicate that we are in front of someone who suffers from unhealthy jealousy. However, it is worth emphasizing the fact that people who experience these feelings live with a lot of Pain most of their days.

Jealousy is a serious problem that may require the intervention of a mental health professional. Generally, people recognize their problems to themselves, but find it extremely difficult to acknowledge them to others and, as a result, refuse to receive help. This can prevent them from getting out of the negative spiral.

10 signs and symptoms of jealous people

• They check the phone of their close ones (partner, relatives) constantly, and also their personal accounts (Facebook, e-mail...).

• They distrust their work colleagues, both men and women.They are distrustful of their partners, both men and women.

• They do not look favorably on their partners when they engage in pleasurable personal activities. pleasurable activities.

• They assume that their partners dress up and put on make-up to please other people. other people like them.

• They carefully check their partners' clothes for other people's marks or smells. for other people's marks or smells.

• Assume that their partners' personal purchases are gifts to other people. to other people.

• They deprive their partners of enjoying spaces with other people.even if they have the opportunity to accompany them.

• They constantly criticize, humiliate, scold and devalue their partners. constantly criticize, humiliate, scold and devalue their partners.

• They usually have a rude and overbearing attitude. and overbearing attitude.

• They ridicule their partners in front of other people.

The need to overcome this problem

People who experience jealousy to a too high degree feel fear, anguish, sadness, stress, and even bodily pains as a result of their mistrust. They may even feel uneasy about life.

But it is necessary to insist on that the problems of jealousy can be overcome by going to an appropriate professional. This emotional situation can be remedied.