What happens when a psychopath falls in love?

Psychopaths are characterized by a lack of empathy. Can they have romantic relationships?

When we think of the term "psychopath", what image comes to mind? Probably, that of a male, between twenty and thirty years of age, lacking remorse and cold as an ice floeand with irrepressible impulses towards the most barbaric and sadistic acts imaginable.

But to what extent are we projecting a stereotype promoted by the media, and is it really a pathology with a higher incidence in the male gender? Recent research has yielded new information about individuals with this disorder, including what it is really like to fall in love with one of them..

Love and psychopathy: an impossible pairing?

Psychopathy takes many forms, one of which includes a subclinical variety of people with prominent scores on personality tests that measure their predisposition toward psychopathic tendencies (though not as behavioral per se). If interpreted as a continuum in which the scores to be obtained are modifiable, one can perceive how the degree to which the subject has psychopathic tendencies is linked to other aspects of his or her psychology and interpersonal relationships.

Psychopaths and romantic relationships: scientific literature

There is a reason to think that subclinical psychopaths might have difficulties in their intimate relationships.. According to a study conducted at Laval University (Quebec) in 2015, common offenders adopt an insecure attachment style (avoidant), which leads to difficulties in creating deep relationships with others.

Those who fit the classification of "psychopathic personality disorder" (regardless of whether or not they engage in criminal behavior) usually manifest behaviors associated with an avoidant attachment style, thus being clumsy to establish any kind of intimate relationship.thus being clumsy to establish any kind of intimate relationship. Two of the key indicators of this disorder, emotional detachment and lack of empathy, are also associated with maladaptive attachment styles.

Yes, psychopaths can also have romantic relationships.

Even so, subjects with typical psychopathic manifestations can indeed engage in romantic relationships.without necessarily implying that they will or will not marry later, or that they will establish a more serious commitment. It is true that these relationships may not be the result of real psychological intimacy in the strict sense, but of the convenience of a couple with a common view of the world that would justify both trying to get the most out of each other.

The lack of empathy and the inability to express emotions of a certain psychological depth could lead to the disintegration of their bond due to the adoption of increasingly destructive patterns of interaction between them. In extreme cases, there could even be abuse and violence, but it would not be a frequent occurrence.

Even those couples that a priori seem doomed to failure are apt to prosper if the more psychologically balanced individual is able to exert his or her influence on the other. Over time, this would allow them to form a bond.This would allow them to form a bond that would favor the development of a greater degree of trust.We may even be able to observe situations from the other's perspective.

Attachment and psychopathy

To discover how attachment style and psychopathy may evolve over time, the team of researchers at Université Laval used a sample of couples who had been married for one year. This made it possible to examine the effects and mutual influences during the time of the study. In total there were 140 couples, ranging in age from eighteen to thirty-five, who had been together for an average of seven years.

Participants completed a series of questionnaires separately, scoring themselves on scales that were designed to measure their tendencies toward low empathy and manipulation (traits of what is known as "primary psychopathy") as well as their inclination to engage in antisocial behavior (attributes of "secondary psychopathy"). In addition to this, the attachment style of each was measured, along with their degree of abandonment anxiety and avoidance, understood as the inability to approach others.

The purpose of having the subjects "self-score" in two different categories allowed the research team to assess the influence of each partner on his or her partner's scores. All the couples were heterosexual, so the study design favored looking at the influence between the sexes.

The authors were able to compare the intensity of the relationship of the "actor" (the one exerting the influence) on the other (the one receiving the influence). They also had to consider the temporal changes peculiar to each man and woman separately from the effect that the spouse caused them and that, in turn, each had on the other.

Psychopathic personality, closely linked to the fear of intimacy in the couple

What could be deduced from all this? Actor-actor effects showed that, for males (but not females) with higher scores on primary psychopathy on the first test (insensitivity), it was possible to predict higher levels of attachment avoidance at the time of the second test, it was possible to predict higher levels of attachment avoidance at the time of the second test.. Males, moreover, expressed stronger relationships over time between primary psychopathy and attachment anxiety, meaning that the more psychopathic a male is, the more he will be wary of intimacy.

For both males and females, the attributes inherent to psychopathy (those leading to antisocial acts) predicted higher levels of attachment avoidance and anxiety with increasing time. Impulsive and irresponsible behaviors were intrinsically linked to fear of rejection and a tendency to leave one's partner.

According to the results of the effects of the "actor-partner" pattern of men towards women, it was concluded that, for women, having a male partner with higher levels of psychopathy in the two dimensions (impulsivity and insensitivity) already from the beginning of the relationship, leads them to end up separating from him. Conversely, men paired with women with high scores only on the impulsivity dimension became more anxious in their attachment style. On the other hand, those women with antisocial propensities instilled fear in their spouses of the possibility of being disowned, in addition to making them more dependent.and made them more dependent and emotionally unstable.

General trends, not causalities

Do we have to think that this correlation necessarily implies a cause-effect relationship? The structure of the study allowed us to examine conclusively which pathways of psychopathy are predictive of attachment and, conversely, which attachment pathways are predictive of attachment disorder. In summary, psychopathic personality qualities should be understood from a binomial perspective and more as predictors of insecure attachment styles, rather than the other way around.

By way of conclusion

So, from all that has been said so far, what ideas do we have to stay with?

For those women who are dating men who tend toward the insensitivity and emotional hardness of the psychopathic end of the spectrum: be alert, for the worst is yet to come. Your partner's inability to empathize with you will only cause you to find refuge in yourself.

Regardless of whether you are the man or the woman in the relationship and whether your partner is highly impulsive, the couple will tend to undergo significant ups and downs.. If you are the one exhibiting behaviors typical of psychopathy, your (already poor) ability to relate intimately to the person to whom you are committed will diminish over time.