What is tenderness?
A reflection on the nature of tenderness and its expression in social relationships.
Defining tenderness with words is not easy, but if we consult the dictionary it tells us first of all that it is a feeling of endearing affection that we manifest before people, animals, things or situations because of their sweetness, naivety, weakness, kindness, candor, delicacy, innocence, affection, affection or love.
The second reading that gives us the meaning of tenderness is that it is a pure and spontaneous sentiment that we show with infinite pampering and an instinctive and disinterested need to protect and care for that being or object.
But we could still make a third reading about what tenderness means and that is that it is a subjective feeling. That is to say, not all of us are aroused by the same things or the same people.
For many people the fact that their partner, loved ones or friends have among their personality traits the quality of tenderness is a very desirable added value because otherwise they can be selfish acts.
Tenderness is a state of mind where sweetness and unconditional love that comforts both the receiver and the giver are blended.. It soothes children, the sick, the depressed ...., but sometimes we find it difficult to express this feeling because it can expose our own vulnerability.
In any case, when we offer tenderness we never seek personal satisfaction, but on the contrary, the relief of the other.
Psychology of tenderness
However, tenderness is also analyzed from the scientific point of view by psychology, although very recently.although very recently, which defines it as a comforting emotion.
For psychology, indeed, tenderness goes beyond a sensation or a gesture towards something or someone, and is also postulated as a type of language that has its translation in our relationships and whose implementation is very beneficial to our well-being.
In other words, practicing tenderness makes us feel good because it connects us with an emotional register that makes us experience calm, confidence and positivity when we do it. when we do it. And although it may seem untrue, because of the material world in which we are immersed, there are many studies that show that tenderness continues to triumph. That's why we enjoy, for example, videos with puppy animals. In this case, they have a high therapeutic power generating psychological well-being.
Psychology also says with regard to tenderness that applying it provides quality to our bondsalthough it is currently a somewhat neglected aspect in this field. Tenderness is an act that translates into affection and empathy within our social relationships because it is carried out in a direct way through closeness and brings out our sweetest and most sensitive part.
Thus, in the couple, tenderness gives meaning to love. Without these gestures full of tenderness that we give to the other, love is not understood, neither sexuality nor coexistence. We would be missing an important element that we transmit through the language of tenderness and that the other person perceives and makes him/her feel loved, respected, valuable and safe.
In the world of children and animals, the power of tenderness is almost magical. Not only does it favor the instinct to protect and care for those who practice it, but also those who need it register it as a touch of attention..
Tenderness is also, according to psychology, a guarantee of survival because it is usually given to those who need it most, children, pets, the elderly, etc., and we show it through caresses, hugs and affection, something that gives the recipient a feeling of security, happiness and a sense of being loved.
Another positive property of tenderness is that it relieves daily stress just by the fact of being surrounded by people, things or animals that inspire this feeling, something that those who know very well.This is something that those who have pets at home, a nice and pleasant decoration or environment at home, or those who are awaited by their loved ones with a smile, kisses and hugs after work know very well.
Tenderness is the authentic expression of affection, therefore, investing in tenderness, say psychologists, is betting on the quality of our bonds and our mental health.
The value of tenderness
Tenderness is when someone takes care of you and caresses you feeling protected and calm, but without possession.
When you feel tenderness towards your partner, another person or your pet, you not only feel good but you notice that time flies by.
Tenderness not only does it not make the world more vulnerable, but the world would be a different place with more tenderness..
Such is the strength of tenderness that it is a source of harmony and endless forgiveness without the need to use words, just a look or a gesture is enough. Tenderness is heard with the heart.
Generosity without limits and without expecting any compensation is the result of the explosion of tenderness.
Those who risk the most in love are the most courageous, generous, compassionate and tender at the same time.
Tenderness makes you great and strengthens the heart, brings out the best of the human essence and shares it with others..
Tenderness is also patience and wisdom, who loves has time and learns to be compassionate, understanding and tolerant. Life usually gives you back what you give.
Tenderness inspires affection, trust, and giving without measure because it is a shared feeling.
Tenderness should be the backbone of the human being and his bedside book to walk through life with a tough skin and a tender heart.
The deepest and most serene feeling that we can have is not passion but tenderness.. Love without tenderness is an empty feeling.
The first contact with tenderness is the contact with the mother's breast, which we sometimes keep in our memory for life. A mother's tenderness is the most unselfish of all.
If we have used tenderness as the motor of our life, when death comes we will never regret it, it is a perfect companion.
When we run out of words, all we have to do is let tenderness express itself. That feeling rocks us.
If someone is drowning in anguish or if you want to connect with them, offer them tenderness, it will be enough to penetrate into a haven of peace, the most precious thing that exists.
If you have discovered, you have entered and navigated through tenderness, the great gift of life, it will be difficult for you to abandon this path, it will be part of your existence.
Tenderness is something that is always desired because it feeds the soul, but it is not always obtained because it is a trait of sensitive people.
It is easier to catch and conquer with tenderness than with hardness, strength and aggressiveness. Tenderness is what gives strength.
Tenderness is humble, it molds itself to any circumstance, experience and situation in life.
Children are the personification of tenderness because they carry it in their skin and in their deepest feelings. The best way to educate them is with tenderness.
Those who possess tenderness more easily show their most genuine feelings of sympathy, affection and gentleness.
How to promote tenderness
Tenderness is a basic feeling, along with sadness, joy, fear or anger, which enables us to show empathy and affection towards other people, animals or things. To live in harmony we all have and feel the need and feel the need to receive affection and tenderness. Nothing easier and at the same time more difficult if one is used to open one's Heart to the purest feelings.
But in reality, tenderness manifests itself through gestures as simple as sweet words, caresses, care, kindness, closeness, a smile or a hug, for example.for example. Such simple gestures can open up a whole world of possibilities for affection and empathy, as well as helping others to feel good.
There are also other ways to express affection and tenderness, such as an affectionate look as recognition, a phone call to someone who we know is waiting for it, a small gift as a symbol that we have remembered something important to someone, giving a seat in a public place to a person who needs it, giving conversation to someone who is lonely or sad, in short, there are a thousand ways to be kind through tenderness.
Clearly, there are many ways to show tenderness. Sometimes these are subject to fashions, traditions, culture or personal situations, but it is certainly a good practice to listen without haste and to ask for forgiveness and to say thank you.
Tenderness is a feeling of altruistic affection that we offer without expecting anything in return and that we can express in small gesturesThe consequences of this will contribute to increase respect, understanding and attention towards those we offer it to, but also towards ourselves.
The normal thing, on the other hand, is that the one who receives these samples of tenderness corresponds with affection, kindness, almost always with a smile, and in any case with gratitude and warmth, reason why it is transformed into a very gratifying mutual act for both parts.
Experts assure that tenderness is perhaps the only feeling related to love that cannot be faked because to love with tenderness is to care, therefore, it is never too late for tenderness.
(Updated at Apr 14 / 2024)