10 tips for saying goodbye (even if you still love him or her)

Even though feelings are still flowing, sometimes it is better to put an end to things.

In the world of interpersonal relationships, especially in the world of couples, there are difficult moments that we have to live through.. One of them is when we live an unrequited love or when we are in a relationship and we know that the time has come to say goodbye because we have tried everything and it does not work.

These situations can create great suffering, and staying in them can be devastating. For that reason, although no one likes to say goodbye to someone they love, sometimes it is the best option.

When saying goodbye is an opportunity for growth

Goodbyes can be very hard, and even more so when we know that we will never see that person we have loved so much again, and we are aware that nothing will ever be the same again and that, with time, the connection that once existed will disappear.

But there are times when saying goodbye is an opportunity to grow, and also an opportunity to redirect our life towards the path we desire, because when love is not reciprocated, the obstacles in the way may be too great to continue on that route. In these cases, it is advisable to be smart and take the right path, the one that allows us to be ourselves again and directs us towards our well-being.

It may sound selfish, but it is even worse to stay on that path in which the other person will be selfish with us at some point or another, because when we do not feel the same and the relationship is not fair. When a relationship starts to be toxic, we are bound to lose.

The decision to say goodbye can be hard, but in this context it is undoubtedly the least bad option.. Although at the moment of saying goodbye it seems that the world ends, the truth is that it is a way to close a stage and start a new one. One that will allow us to grow, and from which we will be able to take advantage of that initial Pain to be more of what we are and develop as people.

Saying good-bye even though there is still love

Although it is clear to us that we must say goodbye to the person we love so much, it is not always easy to take the step. In the following lines we give you some tips to say goodbye even if you still love.

1. Understand the situation and do not rush

Saying goodbye to a person we love should not be the result of an impulsive act, but should be meditated and reflected upon. This means that the situation must be understood and viewed objectively. And when it is clear that staying in that situation will only cause pain, it is better to let it go. However, there are always other options before this one. For example, opt for dialogue or go to couples therapy if you want to save the relationship. However, there are times when saying goodbye is inevitable, and then the only thing left to do is to say goodbye..

2. Be realistic

If you have already given yourself a deadline for things to change and they have not, if you have tried to talk and things do not improve, do not fool yourself: people do not change if they do not want to change, so staying in the relationship any longer will only hurt you..

3. Be sure you really want to do it

The fact of not rushing is to be really sure that the decision we are going to take is the right one. When you are clear about it, and you have weighed the pros and cons of your decision, then you can move on with your life..

4. Be honest

At the point of saying goodbye, it is necessary to be honest. But not only with the other person, but also with ourselves. Going face to face is the best option, although many people find it difficult to talk about their feelings and expose what they really think..

5 Be respectful

If you are honest, you must also be respectful. Therefore, it is possible to say things clearly without a hurtful tone.. Being assertive is a great virtue, and being able to make your point will always be to your advantage. However, you must also be respectful of the other person, and if they don't want to be with you, you must understand that this is something that happens and that you must accept.

6. Look for the right moment

It is always good to look for the right time to talk and, if possible, to say it to their face.. However, if this is not possible, try to make the message respectful and state how you feel. You can send an email or whatsapp if the other person cannot meet you.

7. Be consistent

It is clear that the message to that special person, if it is sincere, will express your deepest feelings in spite of saying goodbye.. But you must remember the situation that has led you to say goodbye, and you must remain true to the idea that it is over. Don't fool yourself, because if the person doesn't want to be with you, they won't be. Once you have expressed yourself, be consistent with what you have said. If it's goodbye, it's goodbye.

8. Close the door

You will probably want the other person to swear eternal love to you after the message, but this rarely happens..... If you've thought about it, you've done the right thing. Do not leave the door open with phrases like "see you soon", because what happens in the future will be seen later. Although hope is the last thing to go, you should not feed it. To overcome this situation you must stick to the premise of "all or nothing" or "with you or without you". If in the future you resume the relationship to be good friends, it will be because that is what you wanted and that is what you feel.

9. Understand that the road will not be easy

It often happens that, after expressing your feelings, you feel a certain comfort and a sense of catharsis. However, leaving someone you love behind is one of the hardest experiences we can suffer.. Heartbreak is a process that is not linear; there will be days with ups and downs where you will want to cry and others where you will want to vent your anger. It's part of the process, so understand it and move on with the decision you have made.

10. Don't run away from your emotions and give yourself time.

If you feel like crying, do it. Take some time out of your day to miss that person at first, but over time you will regain stability and get hooked back into life. If you want to know more about how to cope with this situation, you can read our article "The 5 phases to overcome the grief of a breakup".