11 habits to reach emotional maturity
Some guidelines to create a philosophy of life capable of promoting Emotional Intelligence.
Emotional maturity is a term used to name those people who have a high Emotional Intelligence. They are people who understand their emotions and those of othersThey have good social skills and regulate their behavior to adapt it to the moment and the environment.
Emotional maturity can be reachedIt is necessary to carry out a series of habits and behaviors to achieve it.
Habits to achieve emotional maturity
It must be taken into account that Emotional maturity is linked to personal developmentthat is to say, it is developed over time through certain habits. While it is true that there are some emotional intelligence courses that can be helpful in acquiring emotional skills, many people learn these behaviors as they interact with other individuals and experiment with different life situations.
Emotional maturity is intimately is intimately linked to psychological well-beingStudies have shown that emotionally intelligent people are happier and more successful in life.
1. Pay full attention
Mindfulness is a term that has become very popular nowadays with the rise of Mindfulness, but it has an ancestral origin, as it is rooted in Buddhism and its beliefs. The truth is that mindfulness turns us into emotionally intelligent people, makes us aware of our emotions and our thoughts and helps us to pay attention to the context in which we live. helps us to pay attention to the context that surrounds us, to better adapt to it.
People who work in mindfulness are more emotionally balanced and have a non-judgmental mindset. have a non-judgmental mentalityThey also treat themselves with compassion and accept life's failures.
Since mindfulness is the first step towards change, you may find it helpful to practice Mindfulness with these exercises: "5 Mindfulness exercises to improve your emotional well-being".
2. You learn from your mistakes
Acceptance is one of the keys to emotional well-being and is indispensable if we want to be happy. Life teaches us that things will not always go our way, but many times we can be too hard on ourselves.
In reality, if we have the right attitude, failures can be good opportunities to grow.. That is why it is necessary to leave perfectionism aside, because as much as we think it is good for us, it is harmful to us. You can learn more about perfectionism in this article: "Perfectionist personality: the disadvantages of perfectionism".
3. Develop assertiveness
Emotional maturity is often reflected in interpersonal relationships when communicating with others. when communicating with other people, and although we will not always agree with the opinions of others, it is possible to accept them and say what we think without disrespecting anyone.
This is what is known as being assertive, because assertiveness is a style of communication in which, despite not agreeing with what another person says or thinks, we act without being rude and we are confident and confident. confident and assertive, always respecting the other person's. Assertiveness is a key social skill.
4. Know yourself
Self-knowledge is one of the principles of emotional intelligence, and therefore of maturity when it comes to managing emotions. Knowing oneself and understanding the emotions we experience is necessary to be able to regulate these emotions.
To improve emotional self-knowledge it is good to keep a diary of emotions. In the diary of emotions you can write down every night before going to bed the emotions you have experienced throughout the day and reflect on them.
5. Active listening
Active listening is one of the essential qualities that people must possess in order to relate successfully with other individuals. Active listening is not the same as listening. We often think that putting our ear to the ground when someone speaks to us is really listening, but in reality it is not.
Active listening is not thinking about what we want to say before a person has finished speaking, it is paying attention not only to their verbal language but also to their non-verbal language, and it is knowing how to read beyond the words. You can go deeper into the concept of active listening in this article: "Active listening: the key to communicate with others".
6. Validate others emotionally
Emotional validation refers to learning, understanding and expressing acceptance of another individual's emotional experience.
It has to do with empathy and acceptance of others' emotions, but also with expression, i.e., letting them know. In other words, validation is not only accepting emotions, but this acceptance must be communicated to the other person.
To better understand this concept, you can read this article: "Emotional validation: 6 basic tips to improve it".
7. Improve emotional control
Mastering Emotional Intelligence skills is necessary to regulate emotionsand it is only possible when one is aware of one's emotional experience. Although sometimes people can get carried away by the situation, we have the ability to reflect and make the right decisions.
Often it takes willpower to know how to regulate emotions. With the article "How to control emotions, with 11 effective strategies" you can begin to learn how to do it, although developing maximum competence in this type of capacity is something that requires time, effort and self-knowledge.
8. Prioritize the "we" in interpersonal relationships.
Emotional maturity makes sense in the relationship with other people, that is, in social relationships. With respect to the couple or in the work environment, it is appropriate to prioritize the "we" over the "I".
In the case of work, for example, unity is strength, and in the case of the couple, thinking about each other helps to overcome conflicts, thinking of the two of you helps to overcome conflicts. It is not uncommon to lose control with the people we love, and it is not uncommon to focus on our own needs and leave aside those of others. Emotional maturity is to understand this.
9. Detach when necessary
Attachment is not necessarily bad, as bonds with loved ones help us grow and develop. However, many people become attached to objects and even to their narratives about what is right or wrong.
Growing emotionally means being critical of reality, living in the present and being aware of what attachment is. In order to avoid emotional pain, it is necessary to learn to detach ourselves from our beliefsour thoughts, our memories and, in short, our private events.
10. Let go of the past
Detachment also includes letting go of the past and living in the present moment, because we can no longer live in the past. the past we can no longer live it. As I said, frustrations can help us to grow, because when we stay stuck in previous periods of our life we do not move forward.
Of course we must take into account what happened, but only as raw material for learning. Nothing of what we have done in the past serves to put a "label" on us that determines how we should behave. Accepting that our actions and emotions are flexible is a necessary step towards maturity.
11. Stop complaining
Criticizing yourself for what you did not do well and criticizing others is paralyzing. Emotional maturity means being realistic and in constant movement. That is why it is necessary to learn from your mistakes and use bad experiences to grow as people.
(Updated at Apr 13 / 2024)