25 questions on gender-based violence to detect maltreatment

Sometimes, the biases of the victim and her environment make it difficult to detect abuse.

Gender violence and intimate partner violence are still a social problem to be taken into account today. Multiple people are attacked in different ways or even killed for reasons such as gender stereotypes, or the fact of belonging to a particular sex.

But in many cases people who suffer this type of abuse do not dare to report it due to fear of reprisals, to believe that it is normal behavior or even because of the possible difficulty of establishing the limits when classifying a situation as gender-based violence.

Being able to detect gender-based violence is a prerequisite for dealing with it. That is why there are multiple protocols and procedures dedicated to it. In this article we intend to indicate a series of questions that can be used to help detect cases of gender violence..

The gender violence

It is denominated violence of gender to all act in which it is vexed, assaults, coerces or in general a damage is produced through the violence to a person because of the fact of belonging to a specific sex or gender..

Specifically, this type of violence is defined as specifically directed from men towards women because the acts of aggression are carried out on the basis of gender stereotypes which the female sex as the weaker and inferior sex and subjugated to the male sex.. The aim is to maintain a relationship of domination, superiority and power with the victim, based on these stereotypes. It generally occurs in the couple's environment, although it is not the only one in which it can be observed.

Although there are also men who there are also men who are abused by women, and in their concept this would be and in their concept this would be included as gender violence, it is not usually considered as such due to its lower frequency and the fact that the motive is not usually belonging to the male gender (although it is possible and occurs in some cases, which is why the consideration and specificity that the term gender violence generally has at present is criticized).

Nor is violence between persons of the same sex considered as such (although it may also be gender roles that generate aggression).

The different types of abuse

Gender violence can include many different types of abuse types of violence, such as psychological, physical, sexual or patrimonial violence.. It is common to try to isolate the victim and make him/her dependent on the aggressor. Violence is usually exercised in three moments or phases: an initial escalation of tension, the aggression itself and finally a possible phase of repentance or "honeymoon".

Due to the different forms of aggression that can exist and the different beliefs that some people have about it (for example, some victims believe they are deserving of such treatment), it is sometimes complicated to identify which situations are or are not abuse even for the person being assaulted. This is why it is necessary to create protocols to identify these situations.

Questions to detect gender-based violence

Below are some questions that can be asked or that we can ask ourselves in order to detect whether we are suffering from some type of gender-based violence.

As with other types of violence, if these questions are asked in an interview it is possible to observe signs of abuse or inconsistencies between the verbal or written response and non-verbal behavior.

1. What role does a woman play in a relationship and what role does a man play?

This question may seem innocent, but it allows us to know the opinion of the person asked (either the aggressor or the aggressed party) regarding the role of each of the partners in the relationship. with respect to the role of each of the sexes..

2. Does he/she ever humiliate or criticize you in public or in private?

Although abusers generally tend not to show any type of aggression in public and confine the aggression to the private sphere, it is sometimes possible to detect an undervaluation of the opinion or performance of the woman in question when they are in society.

3. Have you ever been pressured to have sex or have you ever had sex out of fear of your partner?

Sexual violence, in the form of rape or coercionis also frequent.

4. Have you ever been pushed or hit?

Physical violence is often the easiest to observe both externally and on the part of the victim, although it can sometimes be complex for the victim to stipulate where an aggression begins (for example, they may not consider a push to be an aggression).

5. Do you feel that he/she is trying to push you away from your environment?

It is common for the abuser to try to remove the victim from his or her environment, making him or her dependent as much as possible.

6. Does it bother him that you have male friends or that you have contact with family and friends?

For the same reason as above, the existence of contact with other men or close relationships may be seen as a threat to your relationship.

7. Has he ever taken your cell phone and looked at your messages without permission?

Jealousy and the possibility of being abandoned often causes the abuser to try to control interactions with other people.

8. Does he/she send you messages continuously to know where and with whom you are?

Another very frequent element that is observed in the mistreatment is the exhaustive control of what the assaulted person does, and especially with whom. Sometimes they even demand photos and evidence.

9. Does he insult you or call you derogatory names?

Making the victim feel inferior is a common mechanism in gender-based violence, which can serve to keep the victim under control and subdued.

Has your partner ever threatened you or any of your loved ones or made you feel as if they were in danger if you didn't do or didn't do something?

Vicarious violence, especially with children, is used to coerce and sometimes prevents the victim from making decisions such as reporting or leaving the partner.

11. Do you feel safe at home?

People who experience gender-based violence often feel uneasy at home, fearful of doing something that might trigger an assault..

12. Does he/she often compare you to others and put you below them?

Again, a frequent method to weaken the victim's self-esteem is to point out the aspects in which the aggressor considers the victim to be inferior compared to other people.

13. Have you ever tried to report or withdraw a complaint against your partner?

Nowadays there are a large number of reports of gender violence that are withdrawn because of the abuser's promise to change or because of the fear of possible repercussions for the victim or her environment.

14. Does he stop you or try to convince you not to work?

The need to have power over the woman often induces the woman not to work, making her economically dependent on the abuser.

15. Does he decide for you?

Again, this question tries to make you think about whether there is a restriction of freedom and whether there is independence with respect to the other partner.

16. Have you ever had to hide bruises?

It is common for people who suffer gender violence to try to hide the marks produced by the physical aggressions, being frequent the marks of fingers, bites, and punches on the face and other areas of the body.

17. Has he ever told you that you are worthless, that you deserve to be dead or that he is the only one who could love you and that you should be grateful to him?

These types of statements can become relatively frequent and victims come to believe them, causing low self-esteem and the feeling that the aggressor is superior..

18. When you go out, does he/she force you to dress up or not to do it?

Some abusers use their partners as a trophy to show in public, forcing them to dress up and be spectacular. In other cases, they force them to keep a low profile and look as unattractive as possible so that they cannot attract other people.

19. Does he/she prevent or prohibit you from doing something you want to do?

The restriction of freedoms either directly through force or prohibition or through the use of devaluation of certain actions are very common in situations of gender violence.

20. Do you think you may deserve a slap from your partner?

Although most people would answer no, the manipulation to which they are subjected makes some victims consider themselves deserving of mistreatment.

21. What do you think would happen to your children if you left your husband?

Sometimes it is the the presence of children and the possible repercussions for them is what stops victims of gender violence from reporting and/or of gender violence from denouncing and/or ceasing the relationship with the aggressor.

22. Has he ever threatened or hit your children to force you to do something, or blamed you for having to hit them?

Vicarious violence is used as a mechanism to coerce the victim and force him/her to remain submissive.

23. Do you think that abuse only occurs in dysfunctional families?

There is a myth that mistreatment only occurs in dysfunctional familiesThere is a myth that abuse only occurs in dysfunctional families, where there is drug use or in families with few resources and little education. In reality it is possible to observe gender violence in very diverse situations independently of the socioeconomic level or the type of family.

24. Do you consider that violence and mistreatment only occur when there are blows?

Many women and men believe that the use of insults or belittling can not be considered gender violence, considering that only physical aggressions are considered gender violence.considering that only physical aggressions are mistreatment.

25. Are you afraid or have you ever been afraid of him?

A direct question, but one that allows for a simple answer and for the victim to reflect on how she feels about her partner. In spite of this, it must be taken into account that in some cases they may feel that the aggressor needs them or even express gratitude for the mistreatment.

Bibliographical references:

• Jara, P. and Romero, A. (2009). Evaluation scale of the type and phase of gender violence. Jornades de Foment de la Investigació. Universitat Jaume I.

• Pérez, J.M. and Montalvo, A. (2010). Gender violence: analysis and approach to its causes and consequences. Gender violence: prevention, detection and care. Editorial Grupo. p. 322.

• Tourné, M.; Ruiz, M.; Escribano, M.C.; Gea, A. and Salmerón, E. (2007). Protocol for the detection and care of gender violence in primary care. Servicio Murciano de Salud.