6 keys to overcome a betrayal
We talk about what to do in situations where someone disappoints us and breaks their commitments.
Betrayal is one of those circumstances that we can suffer in silence for a while, and that can hurt the Heart of the person betrayed.and that can hurt the heart of the person betrayed. Whether by a partner, a friend, family members or a co-worker, this situation arouses very intense and painful emotions.
The loss of trust that occurs with the "betrayer" makes it very difficult to reconcile with that person. In fact, in many cases, after the betrayal there is a mourning process in which it is necessary to accept the situation. A complicated mourning process, because the circumstances are not ideal for healing the wounds.
With time, however, one can rebuild one's life and move on. You may even be able to forgive the other person.
How to get over a betrayal
Overcoming a betrayal is not easyAnd if the person is very important to us, it can affect the different areas of our life. Now, these delicate and painful situations can sink us for a while, but they can also be valuable experiences and invaluable learning for life.
But what to do when we are betrayed? what to do when we are betrayed? How to overcome this delicate moment? In the following lines we give you some keys to do it.
1. Analyze the circumstances in which the betrayal occurred.
After a betrayal, and as in any situation of grief, the first stage experienced by the person is that of shock. Betrayal is such a painful situation that some people experience a knot in the stomach and terrible disappointment and sadness. In these situations it is important to talk to someone close to youIt is important to talk to someone close to you, because channeling these types of emotions may not be easy. Talking to other individuals may also allow you to see things from a different perspective.
It is also important to analyze the context and the reason why the betrayal occurred. For example, if we are talking about a partner's infidelity, you may not have taken into account the needs of the other person. It is good to be self-critical once the denial phase has passed..
2. Don't be hard on yourself
It is common for anger and sadness to appear in these situations. Sadness is usually experienced when a person begins to recognize the extent of the situation. Despite the pain and the feeling of betrayal, it is also common to reminisce about the good things about the relationship and what one misses. If you feel betrayed, it is because the other person was important to you.
The truth is that during times of sadness you need to release those emotions, and, in fact, this may occur at the same time you feel anger. Emotional instability is common in these delicate moments. What you should do is treat yourself with compassion, and if you have to cry, do it! The important thing is not to be hard on yourself.
3. Don't hold grudges
While we should treat ourselves with affection, we should also not hold grudges against other people. When we feel anger, we experience a need to vent, especially against the person who hurt us. We feel like getting even.
However, this is not a good way to channel emotions, and what we can achieve with this action is also harmful to us. The best alternative is, in fact, not to hold a grudge..
4. Accept the situation
Acceptance is one of the best decisions we can make to regain well-being and mental health. Because as I said in the previous point, to recreate ourselves in frustration or anger the only thing that is going to propitiate is that we are the ones who suffer the most.. Accepting something like this is not always easy, but in the article "Self-acceptance: 5 psychological tips to achieve it" you can find useful information to achieve it.
5. Take your time
Acceptance can take time because there are a series of steps to follow and you need time to reflect on what has happened. However, as we explained in the article "Does time heal everything? Science answers". Time is good to see things from a different perspective, but to heal the emotional wounds of the to heal the emotional wounds we also have to do our part..
6. Be honest
It is important that, throughout the process, you are honest with yourself and with the other person. Connecting with yourself and not avoiding the reality is one of the best ways to deal with problems.. On the other hand, if, for example, you want to overcome an infidelity, sincerity is the best way to do it. In this sense, you can learn more in the article "Overcoming an infidelity: the 5 keys to achieve it".
7. Forgive!
Forgiving the person who has betrayed you does not mean that you have to accept him/her back into your life or that you agree with his/her behavior, but rather that it is an act of maturity. is an act of maturityIt is an act of maturity, in which the situation has been accepted and the person is free of resentment. In fact, forgiveness has many benefits. In the article "Forgiveness: should I or should I not forgive someone who hurt me?" you can check it out.
What are the ideal situations to forgive? We should forgive a betrayal in the following circumstances.
- The individual recognizes the harm the person has caused and is trying to change the behavior.
- The individual clearly asks for forgiveness and gives evidence that he or she does not intend to do it again.
- The action was the result of anger or disappointment and the person regrets acting in this way.
- He or she has learned from the behavior and is unlikely to do it again.
- It is an isolated, relatively unimportant behavior..
(Updated at Apr 12 / 2024)