Couples with age difference, are there any risks?

Age differences in love relationships can come with some extra disadvantages.

Although the statement "love knows no age" has a very tempting touch of romanticism, it may be partly true and partly misleading. Although neither love nor passion are subject to a person's age, it may have some influence on a couple's relationship.

There are many elements that make up and influence a relationship, and couples with a large age difference may face a different set of risks than other types of couples. than other types of couples.

• Related article, "How do smarter people manage romantic relationships?"

Is age a barrier to love?

There are many more couples with a large age difference than we usually perceive, since despite the fact that from a certain time of life the age difference goes unnoticed.

Currently, despite the evolution of beliefs and prejudices, there are still a number of conventions within today's society that tend to negatively judge these couples. tend to judge these couples negatively, especially within their own family or group of friends. or group of friends.

It seems that if this age difference is perceived in couples outside the person is tolerated better than if one touches one closely. Either with a son or daughter, a brother or sister or a very close friend.

However, despite these social restrictions, is the age difference between partners a real drawback for their relationship? According to research published in the U.S. publication The Atlantic couples with an age difference of 5 years or more were 18% more likely to end up separating.

Despite these data, there are many factors that can influence the correct development, or not, of a couple's relationship, age being only one of them. The social context, the shared experiences, the education and values received by both partners values received by both partners will play a very important will play a very important role in reinforcing a couple's bond with a large age difference.

Therefore, age as a number in itself is not as important as the context in which both partners have been raised and lived, what ideology they hold or what values or thoughts they have on certain issues; and these differences can be present in all types of couples, regardless of their age.

Finally, although age is associated with a series of personal characteristics that can be a risk factor for the relationship, a couple's relationship must be based on many other elements such as sexual complicity, complementary personalities and values and, most importantly, a common life project.

Risks in a couple with an age difference

As mentioned above, age by itself need not be a barrier to maintaining a relationship. However, as in couples with very different cultures, a very disparate age between the two partners can lead to a number of external risk factors that indicate the chances of going through some conflict within the relationship.

Family opposition

It is very common in couples with a large age difference that families and even the closest circle of friends do not look favorably on their bond with a much younger or much older partner. may not look favorably on their relationship with a much younger or much older partner.

In these cases, the objective of each of the partners will be to talk to their family members, explain the situation and get them to change the way they see the relationship, in order to normalize the situation. Otherwise, this can become a real source of anguish for each of them, since they will not be able to share time together and may find themselves in the situation of having to choose between their partner or their family.

2. Differentiated social context

Although this can occur in any type of couple, it is common that if there is a large age difference, the social context of each is very different. the social context of each is very different and sometimes almost incompatible..

The circles of friends and the type of environments frequented can vary greatly between a 20-year-old and a 40-year-old, so if there is not an equitable distribution of time spent with each other's friends or hobbies shared in a balanced way, this can lead to a long-term conflict within the couple, since one of them may think that he or she is sacrificing his or her hobbies or friends.

In the event that this happens, showing a sincere interest in each other's tastes and hobbies, even if they are relatively different from ours, will be an indispensable attitude to be able to compensate for these dissimilarities..

A lively interest in other people's issues, even when because of one's own age these issues "remain far away" in the current life experience, will be essential, but without falling into the self-deception of believing that issues that can only be lived with emotion when age and circumstances are right for it, can be lived as one's own.

3. Differences in performance or sexual dynamics

Although nowadays there are hundreds of measures to maintain a satisfactory sexual life, it is true that sexuality is evolving and changing. sexuality evolves and changes with age.

For example, a man who is much older than his sexual partner may need more stimulation time and possibly have a somewhat lower performance, so if this fact is not dealt with in the right way it can generate feelings of frustration or anguish in him.

However, an adequate rapport and an interest in satisfying the partner sexually will be of great help in avoiding possible complications. In the same way, with the help of sex therapy, these couples can enjoy an absolutely satisfying sex life.

As we have specified above, these risk factors are external to the couple, so if the couple has a strong and healthy relationship and the other elements of the relationship are relatively intact, none of the above factors need to pose a real problem.

4. Different short-term goals

Age is often associated with different life goals, and sometimes these do not fit together. For example, the older person may be more interested in having children or in establishing the relationship, while the younger person tends to live relationships in a more liberal way, without so many strings attached. Managing this type of asymmetry is key..

Is it the same for men and women?

Although generally couples with a large age difference are subjected to the judgment of society or the context that surrounds them, these moral or value judgments will not be the same if the woman is much older than if the man is, these moral or value judgments will not be the same if the woman is much older than if the man is much older..

Differences in prejudice between men and women still appear in most areas of everyday life, and relationships are no different. As a general rule, unions in which the woman is considerably older than the man tend to be rejected by society. Whereas if a man of mature age is paired with a much younger woman, it is socially more acceptable and even a source of admiration for him.

This fact can also be a risk factor when it comes to maintaining a relationship, since the pressure that society exerts on women can make them think twice, break or deprive themselves of maintaining an affective and sexual relationship with a partner who is much younger than they are.