How to communicate better with our family: 5 tips
Even if there is a shared history, communication does not always flow well within the family.
The family environment is fundamentally based on the way family members relate to each other. That is why communicating well or poorly within this group can make the difference between creating solid and functional emotional bonds, or constantly experiencing quarrels, fights and loneliness.
In this article we will look at several guidelines on how to communicate better with our family.. Keep in mind, however, that you are going to have to implement these steps in your day-to-day life; just doing it a few times won't do the trick.
How to communicate well with the family
As much as family members spend time together, that doesn't mean they manage communication with each other adequately. In fact, in some in some cases, communication problems can become entrenched and the passage of time only aggravates them due to the inertia they bring with them.
In the case of not spending too much time with the family, it is very possible that the main problem of communication with the family has to do with isolation, that is, the fact of not interacting practically never with those people, or doing it very little and through digital means.
Whether you live in the same home as the rest of the family or not, the passage of time does not necessarily fix anything. That is why it is important to take control of the situation and take care of the way we communicate with fathers, mothers, grandparents, uncles, aunts, uncles, siblings... Create a point and apart and encourage a change for the better. can make both coexistence and expression of affection benefit from it almost instantly. almost instantly.
Follow these tips to qualitatively change the way relationships develop between family members.
1. Don't take anything for granted
The fact that we have spent a lot of time with our families can create the illusion that we know what each family member is thinking. This is why sometimes the communication block between two people of the same Blood is due to a misunderstanding.
The idea that we know a person so well that it is not even necessary to inquire into how he or she is feeling can do a lot of damage in close relationships.. Humans are complex beings, so our behavior is not always predictable.
2. Break the routine with a conciliatory gesture
A small symbolic detail can make the brother, uncle or grandfather with whom we want to improve communication realize that something has changed and stop assuming that the interaction with us is going to be governed by the same rules as always.
For example, giving a pat on the back or offering something to drink, depending on how the relationship has been previously, may be something new, no matter how insignificant it may seem. In the face of these acts, it is easier to start from scratch and facilitate the possibility of more fluid and honest communication. more fluid and honest communication.. This is precisely what the following guideline is about.
3. Make honesty your "guiding" value.
From the moment you decide to improve communication with your family, it is important to make it clear that honesty becomes a priority in your interactions with these people who have seen you grow up. The reason is simple: if this is not the case, the value given to these communicative initiatives will be very low, since the family context is the one in which the greatest sincerity and openness is expected. the family context is the one in which the greatest sincerity and openness is expected.. To better connect with family members, it is necessary not to try to hide our vulnerabilities at all costs.
Not being totally transparent at work or with people you have just met is not frowned upon, but the family, by definition, is the place where you share almost everything about yourself.
4. Put effort into listening
Active listening is a fundamental element in any communicative process, and those that are carried out within the family are no exception to this rule. Sometimes, we tend to fall into the trap that just because the listener theoretically does not need to speak or move, they can completely disconnect from their surroundings and turn their attention to anything.
This can become a habit that kills any attempt to communicate, because dialogues in which only you do your part do not please anyone and serve as a "punishment" for having tried to engage in conversation.
So, when the other person is talking, be quiet and don't interrupt.But give signs that you are following the thread of what is being said and that you are interested, ready to contribute something extra when it is your turn to speak. It is essential to look each other in the eye (if you find it difficult, simply try not to look away from the other person's face or lower your gaze, and eye contact will be established spontaneously), as well as nodding from time to time, making very brief comments on the fly, etc.
5. Show that you don't judge
Family members know each other much more intimately than other people know each other. So it's good to remember that those imperfections in others that we recognize are a reflection of the human character of each other. are a reflection of the human character of a family memberand something that is usually hidden in other people.
Therefore, it is important not to make unfair comparisons: if a brother, a mother or a cousin is imperfect, it is because we have more opportunities to get to know them than the rest, not because they are necessarily worse.
(Updated at Apr 12 / 2024)