How to express emotional pain in an appropriate way: 8 tips
It is not a matter of repressing discomfort, but of expressing it in a healthy way.
Regardless of our intentions and our interests, our emotions always condition the way we behave. But although we cannot take full control of our emotional side, we can modulate the way it is expressed. And this is especially important when what happens to us has to do with the so-called negative emotions, which are those linked to psychological discomfort.
Knowing how to express emotional Pain in an appropriate way in our lives and in our personal relationships is therefore very important, because it is not only important to know how to express it. is therefore very important, because if this task is left unattended, moments of crisis can aggravate the problems in which we are involved. Outbursts of uncontrolled anger, unjustified hostility, adoption of a paralyzing defeatism... These are psychological states that can sink us even more if we do not manage them well.
Why it is important to express emotional pain in a healthy way.
If there is something in which we human beings fail when it comes to managing our emotions, that is trying to deny what makes us feel bad. No matter what we do, we will always have experiences that make us suffer.And trying to pretend that they have not happened or that they do not affect us is not helpful; on the contrary.
If we try to deny or omit what makes us feel bad, it is more likely that at the least indicated moment it will make us act in an unforeseen and difficult to control way. Emotions always find their way through our actions and the way we express ourselves, and we had better be prepared to modulate, even a little, those moments when our emotional side takes over. modulate, at least a little, those moments when our emotional side takes over..
Thus, if we find ways to channel the emotions linked to psychological discomfort, we will be able to prevent them from being misinterpreted or causing more pain to others.
How to modulate and express emotional pain well
In order to manage your emotions of psychological pain, the following tips may help you.
1. Talk it over with someone close to you
Being able to match your own ideas about what you feel with what others think about those ideas helps a lot.
On the one hand, it allows you to express verbally how you feel, all in a safe environment where you feel supported. On the other hand, allows us to relativize the importance of some events that cause us emotional pain.. Seen from a more serene and distanced perspective, some events lose their dramatic power and we are able to face them in a more constructive way. Having a second or third opinion helps to detect those ideas that are based on excessive pessimism.
2. Unload tensions in a controlled way: do sports.
There are painful emotions that lead us to a state of tension and constant alertness. To be able to express their effects in an adequate and healthy way, there is nothing like doing sport. If we exercise our muscles, part of this "overload" of energy will be invested in these tasks that require us to control our attentional focus. After these sessions, the emotional pain may still be there, but we will no longer experience it from a feeling of "being in pain". we will no longer experience it from a feeling of alarm..
3. Have an explanation ready about what is happening to you
You should consider the possibility of informing others about what is happening to you so that they know how to interpret certain unusual behaviors on your part..
The simple fact of having this information prepared will make that you do not avoid facing these situations (to improvise a "report" on what happens to you just when you are suffering the consequences of this discomfort is not comfortable and possibly you prefer not to do it, if necessary).
4. Avoid hot discussions
When we are suffering the full effects of emotional pain, it is not the time to argue. At any sign that conflictive situations may arise, it is worth leaving the discussion for another time. In addition, it is good to explicitly say that you are postponing the conversation for this very reason. Especially in these situations, honesty is a value to be claimed.
5. Use relaxation techniques
Intervening on physiological processes can greatly reduce anxiety. By doing this we act on one of the fundamental aspects of the behavior and state of mind experienced, since making the anxiety experienced, since making anxiety decrease creates a chain reaction that, in general, will be beneficial.
6. Write a journal
Keeping track of how you feel on a daily basis will help you better understand what is happening to you while expressing that emotional pain. Rereading those pages will make it easier to work constructively to solve the underlying problem, either by changing things in your life or by making changes in your life.Whether it is modifying things in your environment or working on your emotions and your philosophy of life.
7. Be careful with food
Binge eating is a common trap into which many people fall when going through bad times or falling prey to anxiety. Eating offers an immediate reward, a sensation of pleasure that allows us to mask for a brief period what we would like to forget.. So, the best possible trick is to keep a very systematic control over what you eat, and not to expose yourself to temptations. For example, literally stay away from the most addictive food.
8. Remember that no one has the absolute truth
Something that helps a lot to express emotional pain in a healthy way is to be aware that you do not have the absolute truth about what is happening. This means that anger, sadness or feelings of defeat are not elements that are there, they exist. are not elements that are there, existing independently of us, as if they were realities that we know and nothing else. We not only know them: we also create them.
(Updated at Apr 12 / 2024)