How to get someone to like you? Gary Chapman gives us 5 techniques

Tricks to know how to give a good image and that others have a good attitude towards us.

When we are getting to know someone, trying to convince a person to buy a product or service from us, starting a relationship or any other type of interaction in which we expect to get a positive response from the receiver(s), usually the first thing we try to do is to get the other person to like us. the first thing we try to do is to get the other person to like us in order to in order to accomplish our task.

We each have our own tactics for making this happen, although not all of us are particularly good at it. So... how do we get someone to like us so that they will think highly of us? In this article we will look at 5 techniques that could help you establish that positive connection with people.

The 5 languages to make someone like you

Gary Chapman proposed a theory based on 5 languages so that we can be liked by others. Chapman considered this proposal as a set of key tools to have a positive relational influence with others.

Each person can have all 5 developed, but in different dimensions; depending on the dominant language of each person, the way in which he or she can be more easily liked will change. It is important, in order to achieve the objective of pleasing, that we know the language of appreciation of others, to "speak" to them in theirs, not in ours.

Words of affirmation

These are simple positive words or phrases that make the other person feel that he/she is doing things right or that he/she is on the right track. or that he or she is on the right track. Give praise.

2. Quality time

Paying attention to someone, without distractions. Doing what the other person likes, without necessarily loving the activity. Spending time together and sharing experiences.

3. Giving details

Give tangible gifts. They are symbols of appreciation, recognition and acceptance; they create an environment conducive to the exchange of emotions and ideas.

4. Acts of service

The phrase "less words, more actions" applies here. For people with this language as their dominant one, words are completely empty, so a good speech will be difficult to make them like you. It's small acts like opening the door, helping carry things, bringing a coffee to the office, cooking for someone else, etc.

5. Physical contact

This is a very powerful form of communication. The peculiarity of this language is that we must know exactly when to use it and when not to use it.. When used correctly, it is an excellent means of expression.

In love

These languages can also be can also be applied in the field of loveIn a couple, each partner has different ways of expressing love and different ways they like others to show their love. So it is important that you both recognize your primary language, this will avoid many misunderstandings and resentments during the relationship.

The key to being able to use these languages to get someone to like you is to be empathetic and receptive to identify which one is the predominant one in each personThe key to being able to use these languages to please someone is to be empathetic and receptive to identify which one is predominant in each person, so you know the best way to approach them and get a positive response. In addition to expressing appreciation, we will also receive a reward, strengthening our abilities to use any of the 5 efficiently.

Establishing a special connection

In the therapeutic field, these languages are very useful to create rapport with patients. But it is important to to know the language they use the most to be able to use it and have favorable results.. Exemplifying each one, in terms of words of affirmation you can use phrases such as "You are doing very well", "You have made a lot of progress", "It's good that you decided to come", "You are very brave / very persistent". Phrases that motivate you to keep going.

Quality time is simply active listeningShowing interest in what he/she is saying and not being distracted by other things. Giving details can be cookies, candy or a snack during the sessions or a small gift on his birthday. Acts of service can be small actions such as opening the door when she arrives, passing her tissues in case she needs them.

And finally, physical contact is a little more restricted in therapy, but you can pat the patient's thighs or back, if appropriate. Similarly, each psychologist has a different relationship with each patient and knows what the limits are in terms of physical contact.