I feel inferior to others: possible causes and what to do about it.

Self-esteem problems related to feelings of inferiority are very common.

Self-esteem is very important for the development of people at all stages. This begins to be established from the early stages of development and is consolidated in adulthood, in which the subject with a good self-esteem will be able to face the different adversities that arise.

However, it is relatively common for people to have problems in this aspect. "I feel inferior to others" is a frequent thought, a consequence of the fact that something has gone wrong.A consequence of the fact that something has gone wrong during the establishment of self-esteem. In any case, by noticing this, we have already taken the first step towards a healthier self-concept. Next we will see what to do in these cases, and some of its possible causes.

Why do I feel inferior to others?

As we have seen before, if I feel inferior to others, it is because the process of establishing self-esteem has been bumped at some point. There are several ways in which this could have happened, so let's look at the most common ones.

Pessimistic attitude

The pessimistic attitude is like a creeper that grows longer and stronger as time goes on and adaptive coping ways are not sought for this dysfunctional thinking. It is based on a bias that leads us to assume that the achievements we make are due to external elements, and the bad things that happen to us are our own fault.

This type of attitude is transferred from one person to another. If we have grown up in a pessimistic environment, it is likely that when we grow up we will tend to adopt this mentality.. But it is never too late to break that negative cycle.

2. Exaggerated behavior

When we exaggerate negative situations in our lives, we are paving the way for us to feel overwhelmed by situations that we could actually manage.. Thinking that all bad things happen to us, or that we are always disadvantaged in any event, puts us in a condition of emotional handicap.

We must avoid this situation at all costs; it is important to understand that the things that happen to us will not always be unpleasant. Bad things are temporary, and better times will always come to the extent that we are able to change our exaggerated thinking.

3. Constant comparisons

People who spend too much time comparing themselves with other people tend to have a higher degree of self-doubt. tend to have a higher degree of self-doubt, and therefore feel that they are in the shadow of others.and therefore feel that they are in the shadow of others. It is common that the result they get from comparisons is that others are better than them.

Comparing ourselves with others can be useful to learn and take certain positive aspects from others, but we should not do it in an obsessive way; everyone is different and has unique capabilities.

4. Envy

Envy is a harmful feeling for any person, since it favors the emergence of anguish and feeds a very competitive and dysfunctional mentality.

You must protect yourself from the possibility of envy. Focus on yourself and the virtues you have, use them to build a bridge to your goals, without the achievements of others.Use them to build a bridge to your goals, without letting the achievements of others cloud your view of your own capabilities. Be the one who influences your environment, and do not let what happens around you affect you in a decisive way.

5. The need for approval

When we invest a lot of resources in trying to please others, we are inevitably forgetting ourselves in the process. we are inevitably forgetting about ourselves in the process.. That is to say, feeling less than others very often happens by being subject to criteria and standards that mean nothing to us other than the fact that they are an external imposition. This leads us to assume a role of pure reaction to what happens around us, instead of working and striving for what really satisfies us and allows us to grow as people.

This situation will result in us never feeling satisfied with what we do, taking into account that we cannot always be able to please everyone. The ideal is to maintain your essence, always being polite to others, but never with excessive praise.

How to overcome the feeling of inferiority?

In the following lines we will review some ways to Overcome the feeling that we are inferior to others..

1. Realize that no one is perfect

The first step is to realize that that no person is absolutely good at everythingand that just as you have things you can improve, everyone has them. It is only a personal task, of each person, to take charge of being the best version of oneself.

2. Interpret failure as an opportunity

Changing the perception we have of our failures brings us closer to a better understanding of our capabilities.. Instead of getting down on yourself for failing at something, evaluate why you failed and learn from your mistakes. See failures as valuable opportunities to learn and know yourself better.

3. Find your virtues

In case you are still not clear about what your virtues are, you should take the time to look for them and find them. It is completely impossible that there are no virtues in you, focus on discovering what you enjoy doing and what you are good at.

4. Avoid irrational persistence

This point refers to being able to accept that we are not always going to be the best at the things we like to do. Instead of feeling frustrated by this fact, start by doing things without the doing things without the irrational need to be the best at them, and do them because you enjoy the pleasure of it.and do them because you enjoy the process.

5. Don't hate your flaws

Keep in mind that the defects of each one of us make us different from others, so they are an important part of ourselves. are an important part of ourselvesWe must learn to live with them for the rest of our lives in an adaptive way.

The ideal is to recognize and accept our limitations without letting them keep us awake at night, always trying to improve our weak points, but understanding that we are not less than anyone else because we are not as good at something.

6. Balance virtues and defects

This balance refers to the fact that instead of devoting all your resources to try to improve your defects, you are also able to put your hands to work in order to to keep improving on the things that come easily to you.. In other words, focus more on your potential and less on your shortcomings. In this way, you will interpret your possible imperfections as a reference point from which to progress in a personal or professional development project.

7. Quarantine the world of celebrities and influencers.

It is very unhealthy (psychologically) to constantly expose oneself to content published on the Internet or in the media that "shows" how celebrities and influencers live..

This is because those photos and videos are basically part of a marketing apparatus that works to give the general public an idealized image of the people they work for. Así, es normal sentirse "menos", porque se evita que veamos las imperfecciones reales de referentes como modelos, actores, futbolistas...

Referencias bibliográficas:

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• Michaels, M.; Barr, A.; Roosa, M.; Knight, G. (2007). Self-Esteem: Assessing Measurement Equivalence in a Multiethnic Sample of Youth. Journal of Early Adolescence, 27(3): pp. 269 - 295.
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• Walton, G.M.; Cohen, G.L. (2007). A question of belonging: Race, social fit, and achievement. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 92(1): pp. 82 - 96.