I feel lonely: 3 keys to overcome it
What can we do to manage the discomfort of loneliness and improve our social life?
How often do you feel lonely? Loneliness is a feeling that most people can experience from time to time, but what to do if this feeling becomes persistent over time?
If not dealt with properly, loneliness can become extremely harmful to our mental health. extremely harmful to our mental health.
What can we do to curb feelings of loneliness?
Many of us can experience feelings of loneliness when we are isolated for too long; however, the feeling of loneliness doesn't just depend on us being physically alone.. Loneliness, like all of our emotions, is nothing more than a state of mind.
According to several scientific experiments carried out, the feeling of loneliness does not necessarily reflect the number of friends or family we have around us. It may be the case that we are surrounded by co-workers, family and friends and our feeling of loneliness only persists and increases.
In this sense, there are several things we can do to manage the feeling of loneliness: here are three tips that can help us.
1. Make friends with yourself first
Taking care of ourselves is vitally important for our mental health. The truth is that we may feel lonely because, deep down, we long for our own friendship and are not at peace with ourselves.
Think about when was the last time you treated yourself well and took some time to relax and de-stress.. I don't mean collapsing on the couch after a hard day's work. I mean to dedicate a conscious time for you and your thoughts. Thoughts centered on yourself, not having to do with work or sentimental problems. It can be something as simple as taking a relaxing bath for an hour instead of a quick shower.
Another option would be to do an activity or hobby that you really enjoy or simply read a good book. When loneliness comes knocking at the door, a good idea is to look inward and spend some time with ourselves. Once we learn to love and respect ourselves, we may not feel so lonely, because we will know that we can always count on ourselves.
2. Be compassionate with others
Sometimes, when we are alone, all we wish we had was someone to be there for us. A person who understands and encourages us when the going gets tough..
Taking the initiative and caring for others can help us. Don't you feel better when someone compliments you or does you a favor? Don't you feel more valued and less alone?
Being kind and empathetic to other people not only helps the person receiving the kindness and empathy, but also the subject performing those actions. After all, in this way, we are actively engaging in a social interaction, which can mean being at the center of a social interaction.This can mean being one step away from making a new friend or simply feeling less lonely, knowing that you have done something good for someone else.
According to scientific studies by psychologists Ed Diener and Martin Seligman, altruism can lead to improved mental and physical healthas well as speed up recovery time after suffering from other types of illnesses.
The next time you experience that feeling of loneliness, try talking to a family member or friend who could use some support. Another excellent option would be to volunteer in an organization whose mission we identify with.
3. Accept that there is no such thing as a perfect friend
No one is perfect. If you feel lonely, you may have fantasized about the idea of being completely socialized.. You may have imagined what it would be like to have an ideal group of friends. The truth is, in reality, there is no such thing as perfection.
Several scientific studies have shown that people with perfectionistic traits are at a higher risk of suffering from depression throughout their lives. Due to the feeling of alienation they suffer from, feelings of loneliness and isolation can be much more intense.. Perfection in socializing can make us completely asocial.
The search for the perfect person means that we never find it. This generates feelings of frustration in us that make us feel less and less inclined to socialize with other people. Many individuals who experience feelings of chronic loneliness are actually social perfectionists.
Don't let your perfectionism get in the way of your ability to make friends.. People are not perfect and not all social interactions are entirely to our liking. Give people the chance they deserve!
Seek help for intense discomfort from loneliness.
If you think you are suffering from chronic or excessive loneliness, it is very important that you seek help from a qualified professional.. That person will give you the necessary tools to make this feeling of loneliness gradually leave our lives. It is a great first step and gives us the opportunity to talk to someone about the feelings we are experiencing.
(Updated at Apr 14 / 2024)