The 7 types of emotional attachment (and psychological effects)

These ways of becoming emotionally attached to others define part of our personality.

Affection, friendship, love... are concepts linked to the fact of manifesting an emotional attachment to another person, who is relevant to us and to whom we feel attached.

It is about a type of affective relationship of great importance for us and which for us and that arises from childhood with our parents, relatives or main caregivers (later this will mark our way of relating not only with them but also with the rest of the people).

But not all of us have the same ways of relating or bonding with others, depending on our experiences and perceptions regarding the type of relationship we maintain (predictability, security, physical expression of affection...) or on factors such as temperament. That is why in reality we can speak of several types of attachment. In this article we will see what they are.

What is attachment?

It is understood as attachment to the type of emotional and affective tie that arises between two individuals and that generates the will to remain in the proximity or in contact with the other, with preference in general for the physical proximity. This concept is fundamental in close relationships and the capacity to feel it is present throughout life.

It is possible to feel attachment to all kinds of people and beings, including pets, or even to inanimate objects. It is not something specifically human, and manifestations of attachment can be observed in a large number of animals.

This phenomenon has been studied by a large number of researchers. Among them, the figure of John Bowlby, creator of the attachment theory, stands out.. This author analyzed infants' attachment to maternal figures, exploring how caregivers become for children elements that transmit security, well-being and affection.

His theory initially saw attachment as a relationship whose goal was the infant's search for these elements, being a mechanism of evolutionary origin and marked in our genes (it is not something conscious) that allows us to protect the child and make it survive.

Another great figure in the study of attachment was Mary Ainsworth, who investigated and carried out several studies on attachment.who investigated and carried out several experiments that in fact led to the generation of a classification between different types of attachment in infancy.

For this purpose, she carried out the well-known experiment of the strange situation, in which the behavior of children is analyzed. the behavior of children in the presence and absence of the maternal figure was analyzed. in a series of situations that include being left alone, in the presence of a stranger and various combinations in which the behavior is analyzed with respect to the environment and the search for security in the mother when she is present.

The major types of attachment in infancy

Four major types of attachment in infancy have been observed, extracted from the observation of the behavior of infants in experiments such as that of Ainsworth.

These attachment types are mainly divided into a single type of secure attachment (this being the majority attachment type) and three types of insecure attachment.

Secure attachment

The so-called secure attachment, which has been found to be the most common type of attachment in infancy, refers to the existence of a type of attachment in which the presence of the relevant figure allows for a relatively calm exploration of the environment, using it as a mechanism or secure base to return to in moments of discomfort or fear.. Such a search will necessarily become active.

The absence or departure of the attachment figure generates discomfort and distress, decreasing their activity and manifesting concern, and their return is always or almost always welcomed. This search derives from the knowledge that the attachment figure will respond to one's own needs in case of need.

2. Ambivalent attachment

A different type of attachment from the previous one, which would fall within the types of insecure attachment, is the ambivalent or resistant attachment. This type of attachment is based on the existence of doubts as to whether the attachment figure will truly respond to their needs, not being sure of being able to count on their presence.

This may be due to inconsistent contact in which the child's needs are sometimes in which the child's needs are sometimes met correctly and at other times are either not met or are not well understood, and the child does not know what to expect.

Children with this type of attachment tend to stay close to the mother or attachment figure at all times, partly due to insecurity, and their departure generates extreme suffering. In spite of this, the return of the mother does not imply a quick and happy approach but a certain rejection and resentment before what they may consider an abandonment, although they tend to come closer and seek contact.

3. Avoidant attachment

In this type of attachment, which is also insecure, we can observe how the subject tends not to look for security and protection in the attachment figure.. When they leave, they do not usually show great levels of suffering or fear and their return is not particularly celebrated, with a certain level of indifference or avoidance of contact with them.

The reason for this may be that the attachment figure may have been considered slow or unresponsive to the child's needs, especially in terms of affection and protection. They may feel unsupported or that their needs are rejected, which may lead to avoidance as a way of defending themselves from the discomfort associated with the feeling of abandonment.

4. Disorganized attachment

A much less prevalent type of attachment than any of the previous ones, disorganized attachment would correspond to a mixture of the two previous types of insecure attachment. It is usually observed in environments where attachment figures are both positive and negative, a source of both satisfaction and harm. It is more common in situations of abuse and domestic violence..

The behaviors displayed are inconsistent: on the one hand the absence of the attachment figure is unsettling, but at the same time he/she may relax because of it. Likewise, their return may be greeted with fear or joy but without seeking closeness. They may seek an active avoidance of contact, or manifest strange or changing patterns depending on the situation. .

Attachment styles in adulthood

The above attachment types are mainly focused on those that emerge during early childhood, in interaction with the mother. But these types of attachment do not remain the same, but as the child grows and becomes an adult, the type of attachment generates a more or less habitual style of thinking and interpersonal relationship.

In this sense, we can find up to three main types of attachment in adults, according to the research carried out by Hazan and Shaver in which they made adults define the type of feelings they had in their personal relationships.

Secure adult attachment

About half of the population has this type of attachment, in which there is generally no frequent concern about abandonment of the environment. frequent concern for abandonment of the environment or overcommitment..

Comfort, reassurance and trust prevail in interaction with others, being able to have equivalent interactions with peers and other attachment figures. They consider themselves worthy of affection and tend towards warmth and stability. Self-esteem is good, they have independence and seek positive relationships.

2. Adult avoidant attachment

A person with avoidant attachment will tend as an adult to have difficulties in trusting others and to feel uncomfortable in intimate relationships. Generally, contacts tend to be more superficial, and there may be discomfort and difficulties in expressing deep aspects to others. They tend to be less sociablealthough this does not imply that they cannot enjoy relationships. They can be self-repressive, shy and appear cold.

3. Adult ambivalent attachment

Ambivalent attachment is shown in adulthood as a way of relating in which one may think that one is less valued than deserved. Self-identity and self-concept may be damaged, with insecurity about wanting/not wanting or being/not being wanted. A deep and intimate relationship is desired, but this may in turn generate a certain reticence and fear.. It is not uncommon for this attachment to generate situations of dependency or codependency, as well as fear of abandonment.