The problem of positive thinking: 4 keys to understanding it
Sometimes, we can fall into the trap of using a lack of optimism to avoid facing reality.
Positive thinking can be a very beneficial mental disposition if we are realistic with the environment around us and the situation in which we find ourselves. At the end of the day, many of the problems we deal with on a day-to-day basis are more fictitious and self-made than real.
However, positive thinking can become a trap, positive thinking can become a trap that invites us to avoid facing the problems we encounter in our daily lives.
Positive thinking as an excuse
Even though the popular saying goes "a brave face for bad weather", it is necessary to analyze this phrase and be aware that it is not enough to put a good face on bad weather. Let's imagine a rainy day when we have to walk to work. If we don't use an umbrella, we'll get wet, so we have to find a solution to bad weather: take out the umbrella.
As Barbara Ehrenreich, author of the book Smile or Die: The Positive Thinking TrapWhen we have problems, looking the other way may make us feel better at first, but not in the long run. Being emotionally intelligent is going to allow us to stay connected with reality and our emotions, which in the long run will be better than avoiding the problems that may appear in our lives." We must face the delicate situations, it is not enough to put a smile on our faces and hope that they will solve themselves.
How are positive people
Our attitude can help us get through bad times in life, but it is not the only prerequisite for solving the problems that come our way. That said, it is always better to look forward with a positive mindset than with a negative mindset. When a positive mindset is coupled with problem-solving skills, realism and courage, our well-being increases, our well-being is enhanced..
But what are positive-minded people like? These individuals possess a number of characteristics that you can find below.
- They are not self-deceptiveThey are honest with themselves and make use of self-reflection.
- They possess high self-esteem and value themselves positively.
- They fall down when they get up, and see failures as opportunities to grow and learn.
- They fight for their own dreams and for their life goals.
- They are self-motivated despite adversity and obstacles along the way.
- They do not compare themselves with others because they have found peace with themselves.
- They live in the present moment and enjoy their day to day life.
- They know and manage their own emotions well and understand the emotions of others.
If you want to learn more about these characteristics, you can read this article: "11 characteristics of optimistic people".
The problems of positive thinking: its limitations
Positive thinking can be good in some situations, but not in all, because sometimes we get carried away by beliefs based on falsehoods. Let's see what are the limitations of this type of thinking.
1. Positive thinking is more than just attitude.
Thinking that with a positive attitude we will achieve everything in life and avoid difficult situations to disappear is a mistake. Positive thinking must always be accompanied by a strong personality and good self-esteem, as well as realistic thinking.as well as realistic thinking. Therefore, one can impose a positive mentality and expect everything to happen in one's favor.
In this sense, keeping one's feet on the ground is a key factor in avoiding irrational expectations, keeping one's feet on the ground is a key factor in avoiding irrational expectations.. Positive people can also fail, the key is for them to pick themselves up, grow as people and follow their path.
2. Positive thinking does not solve problems
Positive thinking can help us to be motivated to move forward, but it is not the only aspect we should have. it is not the only aspect that we must take into account to solve problems.. We have to do our part to make things work out the way we want them to, so willpower and realism are necessary.
Likewise, believing in oneself is also necessary in order not to fall down in difficult moments, because otherwise we would be talking about false self-confidence, and we would use positive thinking to excuse ourselves. we would use positive thinking to excuse ourselves and not having to face reality. If you want to know more about false self-confidence you can read the article "False self-confidence: the heavy mask of self-deception".
3. Positive thinking does not equal happiness
There are many factors that influence a person's happiness, and believing that with positive thinking everything will be rosy is irrational. As I said, positive thinking is not something that one should impose on oneselfRather, the person must have a strong personality and a healthy self-esteem and adopt this way of thinking. Of course, always in a realistic way.
Positive thinking is not looking the other way when things are not going well, but facing reality and accepting it as it is. Then you can look to the future with hope and work on the path you want for yourself.
4. One cannot have positive thinking all the time
You can't live life with a smile on your face all the time, as if the context in which you live doesn't matter.as if the context in which one lives does not matter. There are situations in which one must suffer and cry if necessary, as a way to free oneself from the emotions that affect one. Experiencing Pain at some point in one's life is totally normal. In fact, the best learnings are those that occur after an adverse situation.
As I said in the previous lines, false optimism is an attempt to conceal low self-esteem.. It is not necessary to show a smile and pretend that everything is going well. That, sooner or later, disillusions, despairs and frustrates a person.
(Updated at Apr 13 / 2024)