7 questions to know if you are well with your partner

Reflecting on the state of the love relationship is necessary to maintain the bond of affection.

Relationships are not always easyand in many cases the stages in which they do not go through good times are suspiciously common. It should not be forgotten that, as in any interpersonal relationship, each member of the couple has his or her own vision of the world, tastes, needs and even insecurities.

In order to try to make the best possible match between partners, dialogue is essential, dialogue is essential. Communication is one of the basic pillars of a relationship, because dialogue is what allows to maintain the project of life in common that two people who love each other start. When living together with others, it is always necessary to negotiate, give in and reach agreements, and couple relationships are no exception.

Social skills, key in a couple's relationship

Many times we think that true love fits magically, that when two people love each other things always happen in their favor because the force of love can do anything. This may be fine for the script of a Hollywood movie, but in real life, for a couple to work, the two people in love have to do their part.

Over time, one learns that it is necessary to possess a series of interpersonal skills for love to succeed, such as communication skills, empathy, active listening, assertiveness, respect or patience... In a relationship, conflicts can arise at any time. conflicts can arise at any time, the key is to know how to solve them.The key is to know how to solve them.

Questions to know if you are well with your partner

Believing that there will be no ups and downs in a relationship is an irrational belief, and the attitude with which one faces difficulties often determines the success or failure of the relationship. The important thing is to manage the situation The important thing is to manage the situation so that it does not get out of hand, because as the conflicts progress, then it is more difficult to return to the initial point.

So the first step is to detect that things are not going well. If you have a partner and you find yourself in a difficult situation, you may be wondering...how is it possible to know if a couple is going through a crisis? Below you can find a series of questions that will help you to reflect on your situation.

1. Are there any grudges?

Love is a magical and intense feeling for both good and bad. Being in love is one of the most incredible experiences a human being can live, but the emotional pain we feel when things do not go well in our love relationship is very deep and penetrating.

Conflicts with our lover hurt us more than confrontations with other people (for example, a friend) and provoke in us a much stronger and passionate reaction.

Therefore, it is easy to feel offended when things do not go the way we want them to go and discomfort can lead to enormous resentment when problems are not solved. when problems are not solved. If there are grudges towards your partner, you better solve them as soon as possible; otherwise, the problem may become bigger and bigger and the tension may be so great that the relationship will end up breaking up.

2. Do you negotiate in conflicts?

Communication problems are one of the most one of the most common reasons for conflict between lovers.. The quality of communication determines the future of a couple's relationship, and that is why it is necessary to listen to the other person and be assertive, especially in difficult moments. Conflicts can arise at any time, because we all have our needs and our own space within a relationship.

Knowing how to empathize with the other person, paying attention to his or her opinion and negotiating avoids many problematic situations and helps prevent the relationship from becoming toxic. If you find that either of you is imposing your opinion, not listening to the other and not negotiating the important issues, it may be time to fix it.

3. Do you agree on the important things?

It is not necessary that you always share the same points of view.However, on the important things (such as common goals and ambitions) you should generally agree.

Each member of the couple has an individual scale of values, but as the relationship strengthens, it is necessary to build a common scale of values. This is basic to have a life project together, which helps you navigate in the same direction and gives the relationship a sense of transcendence.

4. Does he/she support you in difficult moments?

People are not perfect and neither are couples. But if the relationship is going through a bad time due to difficult life circumstances, for example, work or personal problems, it is always better to stay together than to go our separate ways.

Do you feel that your partner is there for you and supports you in difficult times? How does he/she behave with you when you are alone together? Reflecting on these questions can make you see if your partner is committed to the relationship and to you. and to you.

5. Do intimate relationships work?

Intimate moments with the couple play a very important role in the unity and stability of the couple and influence the emotional health of its members. Hugging, kissing, showing love and sexual relations make the members of the relationship feel a unique connection. But as time goes by, it is possible that the intensity of sexual contact decreases and sometimes it can become monotonous, and this can cause serious problems for the good functioning of the couple.

When the passion begins to diminish, it is important to to look for mechanisms that allow to revive again the passion in the sexual field. in the sexual field, otherwise, the harmony in the intimate relations and in the expression of affectivity are affected. If this happens, it is necessary to reverse the situation as soon as possible.

If you have been with your partner for some time and you notice that the frequency of intimate relations is not the same as it was at the beginning of the relationship, it is normal, but if you perceive that there are sexual difficulties and that sex is no longer an intimate experience that connects you deeply, perhaps you are going through a bad time. Attending couples therapy can help restore that bond and may give you the opportunity to overcome this situation.

6. Are you thinking about cheating on your partner?

Undoubtedly, one of the fundamental values for building a stable love relationship and marriage is fidelity. In fact, one of the most frequent reasons why a couple attends psychotherapy sessions is to overcome this act considered as a betrayal. to overcome this act considered as a betrayal and disloyalty..

Monotony or communication problems are often at the root of infidelity, although the person who is unfaithful, to avoid feeling bad, may blame his or her partner for having reached this situation. While it is true that the blame often lies with both partners, the person who has carried out the infidelity has made the decision to act in this way.

Surely he or she could have resorted to other options, for example, having spoken in confidence with his or her partner about what he or she considered was not working in the relationship. Whatever the cause, if you also find yourself in this situation and if you are thinking about being unfaithful, there is something wrong in the relationship.

7. If you could choose your partner again, would you choose the same person?

Maybe your relationship is going through a bad time and you have an immense desire to get away from this relationship, since it is affecting your day to day life and you have stopped being the person you used to be. Maybe the gap that separates you and your partner is so wide that you no longer want to be with him or her.

However, it may happen that, despite the conflicts that have arisen in your relationship, deep down you know that your partner has a good Heart and that it is worth fighting for what unites you, which is a lot. In this case you should know that couple problems can be solved with the help of a psychologist.It is not necessary to suffer from a mental disorder to go to couple therapy, since the therapeutic relationship in this specialty does not revolve around the individual, but around the relationship.

Couples therapy: when to go?

Couples therapy is a beneficial alternative so that the love relationship regains stability, communication problems are solved and both partners feel happy again.

In most cases it is possible to get out of the negative spiral The relationship has fallen into and to reinforce the bonds of affection or reactivate them. But... how does one know that the time has come to go to couples therapy? Some indicators to go to couples therapy sessions are:

• There are communication problems
• Satisfaction in the relationship is declining
• There is a specific crisis situation
• There are problems in intimate relationships
• There is indecision about future plans
• There is an estrangement with the partner
• There has been an infidelity
• There are problems of trust and jealousy

Instituto Mensalus: psychological assistance in couple and sexuality problems

Instituto Mensalus is a psychology center in Barcelona formed by a team of psychologists highly specialized in couple therapy. If you feel identified with the previous lines, this clinic can offer you solutions and help you in the difficulties that your relationship is going through.

Couples therapy is a positive resource for individual and couple growth. Mensalus can help you learn new ways of relating to your partner with your partner and can provide you with tools to overcome difficulties in the relationship and in living together, couple conflicts and sexual problems (lack of desire or arousal, problems reaching orgasm, premature ejaculation or erectile dysfunction, etc.).

This center offers face-to-face therapy and online therapy. For more information, just click here.