How and when to talk to them about sex

Sexuality is an issue that can make parents uncomfortable, especially if the interlocutor is their own child. Like almost everything in life, we must start talking to children about sexuality from the time they are small. But if the subject has never been broached, it is never too late to start.

• The home should be the place par excellence where the subject of affection and sexuality is discussed.
• It is important to create a climate of trust, take advantage of everyday situations, and provide clear and simple information.
• There is no ideal age to talk about it, but it will depend on when the child expresses doubts or curiosities about the subject.

Keys to address the issue

Children and adolescents need to know about interpersonal relationships in all its facets. Sexuality is one more way to communicate between equals. The home should be the place par excellence where the subject of affection and sexuality is discussed. Clear and simple information and the trust between parents and children to speak freely about all the doubts that may arise can be key to avoiding possible risks such as abuse, pregnancy or contagion of The key points to address would be:

• A positive view of sexuality.
• Information to take care of your sexual health.
• Training in values: self-esteem, respect and affection.
• Ability to make decisions for themselves.
• Social skills to deal with equals.
• Perception that every act has consequences.
• Make it known that there is a strong bond with the adults in the home to ask anything they need.
• Be open and accessible at any time.
• Respect and listen to the opinion of our children.
• Don't feel ashamed or ridiculous. Honestly accept what is not known and inform yourself together.

The best time to talk about sex and sexuality

We cannot give a key moment in the development of the child, only a clue of when to start. The moment our children begin to receive messages about sexuality, it is the ideal time to address the issue. It is true that these inputs begin from birth: they feel and perceive their body, we show them the parts of their body and they see how we behave with them and with each other. If we pay attention, we can find everyday moments that can be used to start conversations about sexuality: a television program, a pregnancy with someone close ... It can be embarrassing for many adolescents to talk to their parents about this issue, do not insist or force, just let them know that you are open to any questions. The process of becoming comfortable between parents and children takes time, especially if the topic of sexuality has never been discussed before. IDEAS TO START A CONVERSATION ABOUT SEXUALITY

Small children:

• Do you know the parts of your body?
• Are you a boy or a girl?
• Do you know how a boy differs from a girl?
• We are expecting a baby brother, a little cousin ... do you know what it means to be pregnant?

Tweens:

• How you feel?
• Have you noticed the changes that are taking place in your body?
• Do you think you are old enough to date a boy or a girl? Does any friend have a partner?

Teenagers:

• Do you like or dislike the changes your body has been making?
• At what age do you think a person should have sex? How should you decide?
• What do you think it is to be a father or mother? At what age do you think you are ready to have children?