Mixed couples: what are they and why have they become popular?

Many people prefer to choose a partner outside their national territory.

The formation of mixed couplesthat is, those in which there are significant cultural differences between the partners (such as country, religious beliefs, language or ethnicity), has seen a considerable increase in recent times.

This growth is attributed primarily to the increased possibilities of meeting people from other countries due to the intensification of international mobility and the massification of communication through the Internet. In addition to the above, a series of social transformations have been taking place in the area of love that allow people greater freedom and autonomy in their choice of a partner. and autonomy when making marital choices.

Migration for love

Migration in which one of the main motivations is to establish a couple or a family is referred to by some social researchers as migration for love. 

This migration typology is described as a diverse and complex phenomenon that transcends the simplifications and prejudices with which it is usually conceived from common sense. and prejudices with which it is usually conceived from the common sense.

A basically female phenomenon

Different ethnographic investigations highlight the fact that women express much more frequently than men that their feelings and the desire to initiate or establish a relationship with a partner has been one of the main reasons for geographical displacement.. This is attributed to the fact that there are still structural conditions for the man to function as the provider in a family and the woman is the one who prioritizes the care of the children and the home, leaving her professional development in the background.

Therefore, it is more common for a woman to leave her country and migrate to her partner's country or to accompany her partner on a labor migration.

Migration for love is thus described as predominantly female and is mainly directed from regions of the Caribbean, Latin America, Eastern Europe and Southeast Asia.Europe and Southeast Asia to wealthy countries in Western Europe, North America and the Asia-Pacific region. The ease of mobility for European citizens within the EU has also led to a significant increase in the formation of intra-European binational couples.

Mixed couple patterns and their motives

Differences between people of different cultural backgrounds can be softened or intensified if they share or differ in other characteristics such as: urban or rural lifestyle, educational level, professional environment, social class, etc. Sometimes, even though people come from different countries, they share many other factors, resulting in more elements of affinity than distinction, share many other factors resulting in there being more elements of affinity than of distinction..

For anthropology it is a fact that in all cultures people tend to bond with members of their own group and that bonding with others is an exception. The choice of a partner belonging to another culture can be interpreted as a transgression of one's own culture and family ideals, since a foreigner will transmit values different from one's own.

In bi-national mixed couples, the borders of the countries are transcended.In binational mixed couples, the borders of socioeconomic class and educational level are transcended, but most often the borders of socioeconomic class and educational level are still maintained. It is also possible to observe the existence of a sort of hierarchy of cultural distances, in which certain nationalities or groups of emigrants are considered more or less susceptible to being chosen as partners. In such a hierarchy would be placed nationalities which would be considered totally incompatible to those whose practices and customs are admired.

Status exchange

Although in smaller proportions, sometimes in mixed couples, socioeconomic or educational boundaries are also transcended.. In these cases, an exchange of status may occur. This is the case of people from rich countries (high status) with a low educational level (low status) marrying people from poor countries or marginalized minorities (low status) who have a high educational level.

The exchange can take place for any element that can be considered as a guarantor of status in a person: beauty, age, social category, a nationality that possesses a certain prestige, etc.

Sociology highlights that statistically, men tend to marry more frequently in a hypogamous manner than women.. That is, with a partner of a lower socioeconomic level. And, therefore, women tend to marry more frequently in a hypergamous manner, that is, with a man who has a higher socioeconomic level. This is also true for mixed couples, although the educational level attained by women in recent decades is making the statistical difference less and less wide.

It has also been observed that the higher the level of education, the greater the probability of forming a couple with people from different countries. Greater endogamy (i.e., the tendency to maritally bond with people from the same culture) occurs more intensely in people with strong religious observance.

The mixed couple as resistance to transformations in gender relations

It is relevant that, according to different research, gender-related motivations are expressed by men and women who decide to establish a couple relationship with a foreign person.

Gender-related motivations are much more evident in the case of men from wealthy countries who seek a partner abroad. who are looking for a partner abroad, as well as in women from those countries where these men focus their search. It is suggested that the material and sentimental independence acquired by women in the more industrialized countries has generated resistance from some men with respect to this new female model.

This resistance leads them to look for a partner in a marriage market other than their own country, opting for nationalities in which it is assumed that women maintain a more traditional role. In other words, they family and home as a priority over their profession, and that they would accept gender relations in a marriage market other than their own.and that they would accept gender relations based on a certain degree of submission and dependence. This stereotype is given, for example, to women from Latin American or Eastern European countries.

The search for a more traditional woman is more pronounced in men over 40 years of age; in younger men, the prototype of the submissive and housewife woman is less appealing, with other factors having more influence as motivators to establish a relationship with a foreign woman.

Longing for polarized gender roles

Some men justify their desire to seek relationships with more traditional women by the conflicts and tensions that they believe were generated by the independence gained by women in their previous relationships.

The longing for more polarized gender roles is also present in some women from industrialized countries who state that part of their interest in a foreign partner is the desire to relate to men whose way of being is closer to a certain stereotype of traditional masculinity: gentlemanly, romantic, passionate, seductive. This type of stereotype is given, for example, to men from Mediterranean or Latin countries. The polarization of the genders in these cases is seen as a value of complementarity and also as part of the sexual stimulus.

Marriage to a foreigner as a search for equality

Paradoxically, for many Latin American or Eastern European women, one of the main motivations for entering into a relationship with a foreign man is the desire to acquire equality quotas. one of the main motivations for entering into a relationship with a foreign man is the desire to acquire a degree of equality and emancipation that they do not find in their own context. and emancipation that they do not find in their own context. These women describe gender relations in their home countries as more subordinate and inequitable than they assume to be the case in their migration destination.

Men in their own country are described as more macho, controlling, possessive, unfaithful and aggressive. They consider these aspects to be ingrained in their own culture, and believe that they are present to a much lesser degree in the men of the destination country. Some of the women also express a desire to distance themselves from previous experiences of abuse and alcoholism of their ex-partners. In these cases, gender polarization is seen as a manifestation of oppression and inequality..

Physical appearance: the ideal and the exotic

The predominant physical aspect in some nationalities is the object of attributions that nourish the fantasies of men and women, also constituting a factor that affects as a motivator to establish a relationship with a woman.It is also a motivating factor in establishing a relationship with a foreigner. It is, in part, the attributions about the sexuality of certain population groups.

Research on international matchmaking agencies that operate on the Internet is evidence of this. This is the case, for example, of those specializing in Latin American or Eastern European women, which emphasize the physical characteristics that are supposedly valued by potential "boyfriends". One would be the Nordic ideal type (tall, blonde, blue-eyed, slender) or the exotic type referring to Latin American women (brunette, curvy and sensual).

Marriage as a way to improve living conditions

The cultural model of the couple that predominates in the West is based on the ideal of a relationship established by free and spontaneous love and spontaneous love, distanced from any calculation or interest. Therefore, material motivations, which are sometimes interwoven with sentimental ones, tend to be much more veiled in the discourse of women who decide to formalize a relationship with a foreigner.

In many cases, the countries from which people who migrate for love come are characterized by high rates of job insecurity, insecurity or other aspects that promote the search for better living conditions. Marriage to a foreigner is one strategy among others to be able to settle in a place that offers better opportunities.

In spite of this expectation, people with high levels of education encounter bureaucratic obstacles in order to be able to work in the field of their profession and are forced to do jobs that do not require qualifications. are forced into jobs that do not require qualifications..

Social pressure on mixed couples

One of the situations that many female love migrants often face is resistance from the family and friends of their partners, who accuse them directly or indirectly of marrying for economic interest or to legalize their residence in the country. Many of them report that they constantly have to prove that their marriage is based on feelings and that it has not only been instrumental. Some women consider the arrival of the couple's first child as a milestone of legitimization..

In relation to the above, it has been observed that women who migrate for love do not usually seek to establish ties with migrants of the same nationality in the place of destination. Such distancing is sometimes encouraged by their local partners responding to the desire to make a difference with economic migration and the stigmas surrounding it.

Bibliographical references:

• Gaspar, S. (2009). Integration and social satisfaction in mixed intra-European couples.Discurso y Sociedad, 16, 68-101.
• Roca Girona, J. (2011). [Re]searching for love: Motives and reasons for mixed unions of Spanish men with foreign women.. Journal of Dialectology and Popular Traditions, 2011, vol. LXVI, nº2, p.487-514.
• Roca Girona, J. (2007). Migrants for love. The search for and formation of transnational couples.. Aibr. Revista de Antropología Iberoamericana, 2007, vol. 3, nº 2, p. 430-458.
• Roca Girona, J.; Soronellas, M. and Bodoque, Y. (2012). Migrations for love: Diversity and complexity of women's migrations.. Papers, vol. 97, no. 3, p. 685- 707.
• Rodríguez-García, D. (2014). Around transnational kinship: contextualization and theoretical-methodological considerations.. AIBR-Revista de Antropología Iberoamericana, 9(2): 183-210.