Overprotected Children: 6 Educational Mistakes that Harm Them

Parents and educators may be raising capricious or spoiled children without realizing it.

The desire to make children enjoy this stage of life to the fullest can lead to overprotection of children can lead to child overprotection with astounding ease..

What at first may seem like simple help and emotional support, sometimes becomes magnified and floods almost all areas of children's lives, making it impossible for them to develop the personal skills they need to develop the necessary skills to be successful in life. not being able to develop the personal skills necessary to gradually conquer autonomy. little by little.

If overprotection is so harmful, it is partly because it is not always easy to differentiate it from the natural kindness that adults show to the youngest. That is why it is very important to recognize the signs that a child is being deprived of the possibility to develop psychologically as it should through basic learning.

Educational mistakes and child overprotection

Below you can see many of the frequent mistakes that are behind the appearance of spoiled and overprotected children. spoiled and overprotected children.

1. Assuming that education is the school's business

Some parents assume the idea that the only challenges that the smallest of the house must face are those of the school. That is to say, that the only place where they should make an effort to do things is within the walls of the school, and that outside the school, parents or guardians are the only ones who can help them. outside the school, parents or guardians should offer all possible facilities as "compensation" for their children's efforts..

But it doesn't work like that; the main intellectual and emotional skills are learned outside of school, and that means that you have to work hard to make progress after school hours are over.

2. Avoiding conflict at all costs

Some parents and teachers prefer to avoid problems by foregoing the possibility of negotiating with children when a conflict of interest arises. The idea behind this strategy is that the child himself/herself will spontaneously realize that he or she has acted capriciously..

The results of this, of course, are not as positive as one might expect from this logic. In fact, such a naive strategy translates into something very simple: the little ones always get their way... at least in the short term, because always doing what you want is the shortest way to overprotection and lack of autonomy.

3. The belief that frustration is bad

The sight of a child feeling discomfort or a certain degree of frustration can become almost unbearable for some adults, who will be quick to offer their help and protection.

However, it is a good idea to However, we should not be afraid of the possibility that someone who is going through childhood may experience frustration, if it appears on occasion.if it arises from time to time.

Frustration is something that children must be able to foresee and learn to manage, otherwise, when nobody can help them, everything will become a ball for them and they will have to try to learn by force what to do, without having previous experience in the matter.

4. Blindly relying on vicarious learning

Some parents and educators believe that by simply solving a problem in front of a child's eyes, the child will learn the lesson and may repeat the strategy in the future.

It is true that learning through what we see others do, or vicarious learning (a concept developed by psychologist Albert Bandura), is one of the mechanisms by which we adapt to life's challenges (a concept developed by psychologist Albert Bandura), is one of the mechanisms by which we adapt to the challenges of life, both in childhood and throughout the rest of our lives. However, it is not enough in itself, and cannot be the only learning modality.

To master a skill well, it is necessary to participate in the problems to which it must be applied. Anyone who has tried to teach someone computer science will know this: taking control of the mouse and showing the sequence of clicks needed to perform an operation means immediate forgetfulness on the part of the poor learner if he or she is not familiar with the program.

5. The basic error of priorities

Another frequent error that produces overprotected children is the assumption that the objective of education is for the child to like them, to establish a strong emotional bond.

This emotional bond is very important, but it is not in itself the objective of education. Therefore, it is detrimental to reward the child's lack of affection, it is detrimental to reward lack of initiative and inaction.It is necessary to set reasonable and achievable challenges that the children can carry out. This will not only make them learn, but it will also make them feel good to feel a sense of achievement every time something goes well and, of course, will be beneficial for their self-esteem.

6. The pampering competition

In order to educate it is necessary to self-examine and reflect on the reasons that lead us to treat the little ones as we do.

And, included in this task of analyzing one's own motivations, it is essential that we stop to think about whether we are spoiling a child too much simply because of the social image produced by educating someone who is always with all his or her needs met (but not necessarily happy).

Especially in the case of parents, this pampering competition that leads to comparing the treatment offered to one's own children with that which friends and neighbors provide for theirs can be a very great temptation that should be avoided; after all, everyone has an unreliable and unrealistic image of how they are educated in other people's homes.