Resilient couples: what they are like and what makes them strong and enduring
A review of the characteristics of resilient couples, those who can overcome crises.
No relationship is the same, but if there is something that defines couples that last happily for the rest of their lives, it is their high resilience. In spite of conflicts, adversities, and stones that may come along the way, couples who are resilient not only overcome problems but also become stronger with them.
Resilient couples understand that each partner is a free individual, with his or her own opinions, desires and expectations, but also that the relationship is a matter of two and that decisions cannot be made unilaterally. Both love, respect and desire each other.
Today let's take a closer look at what resilient couples are like and what their characteristics are. so that those who want to improve their relationships can take note of what they need to do to do so.
What are resilient couples like?
Resilient couples are very flexible to life's adversities. They can adapt to any situation that affects both partners.. Like a rubber band, life can test the relationship, pull on the couple, but despite this, they end up returning to a position of growth and evolution, a position of respectful love and harmonious coexistence.
But, before we talk in depth about what resilient couples are like, we must first clarify the key term that defines them, what is resilience? This fashionable word refers to the ability of human beings to adapt psychologically to difficulties and changes, overcoming them and coming out stronger than before.
Translated to the field of love relationships, resilience in the couple is the ability of two people who love each other, want each other and want to have a life together to overcome, adapt and overcome the difficulties, problems, crises and disagreements that arise from overcome difficulties, problems, crises and disagreements resulting from living together.. Resilient couples know how to take advantage of these inconveniences, turning them not into a source of discord but into an opportunity to grow together and, as a result, strengthen the relationship.
Characteristics of this type of couples
There are several characteristics attributed to resilient couples, a topic that has aroused scientific interest in recent years. However, the main defining feature of these relationships is their ability to deal harmoniously, respectfully and harmoniously with life's difficulties and problems that can potentially harm life as a couple.
These relationships are able to withstand conflict and not break down.. Their resilience, similar to the elasticity of the rubber we mentioned before, is capable of receiving blows, whether they are hard setbacks or simply taps, adversities that put a strain on the relationship and then return to normal, to the original form of the relationship.
We can improve our relationship as a couple. It is true that it will require some effort to control our emotions in the face of disagreements and discrepancies with our partner and try to think that, although we are still two individuals, in a couple relationship there are two people who are in the same boat and that when there are waves, the problems of one affect the other directly or indirectly. Therefore, if we want to achieve couple resilience, we must know what are the main characteristics of this type of relationship:
1. Accept that we will not agree on everything.
Resilient couples are relationships in which there is a strong acceptance of the idea that, even if they are in a loving relationship, they are not going to agree on everything.. A couple are two people who, although they love each other, still have their own opinions, their own belief systems and interpretation of the world.
In authentic love there is room for disagreement and different opinions and it is understood that, not by having different, even opposite, points of view, two people love each other less. Affection is shown by accepting each other, respecting each other's approaches. It is this genuine acceptance that makes it possible to resolve conflicts and avoid misunderstandings.
2. Real and sincere commitment to understanding each other
In resilient relationships, both partners are attentive to each other's needs and concerns. These couples do not minimize the Pain and suffering of the other with phrases such as "you worry about nothing" or "you are an exaggerator".. Being sensitive to each other's emotions and discomfort prevents it from becoming a major problem after a while.
But there must be real interest, dedicating time to the other, being willing to listen, being empathetic and having good communication skills. Resilient couples do not wait for each other to guess what is wrong, much less use punishing silence when there has been an argument. Concerns in the relationship are communicated assertively. You say what you feel, what you think and what you need.
3. Don't look for blame, but for solutions
It is common that in worldly relationships, after a conflict or a problem, blame is sought. This is a toxic dynamic that, far from helping the situation to improve, can worsen it to such an extent that it ends the relationship after a while. It is typical to use phrases such as "you always..." or "you never do what I want...".
The worst thing for a relationship is to project all the blame on the other person.. We cannot expect things to go better if all we do is complain about the bad things that happen to us and throw them in the face of the person we are supposed to love. This does not happen in resilient relationships, where couples focus on solving the problem, not on blaming, a much more effective strategy.
4. Not being afraid to show emotions
In resilient couples there is no fear of showing what you really feel. In these relationships emotions are expressed and, far from being interpreted as a sign of weakness or showing vulnerabilities, it is done as a sign of genuine sincerity and trust in the other. Expressing every feeling, need and intimacy to the other strengthens the relationship and nurtures trust..
5. Positive attitude in the face of adversity
Being positive and showing good humor in the face of any problem in life is a basic aspect to live well, not only in couple relationships, but in any type of human relationship and personal environment. In the specific case of couples, the sense of humor and the will to always want to bring a smile to the one you love help the relationship to go well, even in the most adverse situations.even in the most adverse situations such as poverty or illness.
6. Being a priority for each other
If there is something that defines happy and stable relationships is that both are the priority of each other. There is a long-term commitment, whereby the person you are dating becomes one of the most important aspects of your life. No decision is made unilaterally. No one decides for both of you, because no one is more than the other.. Always take the other person's opinion into account before doing anything that will have an impact on both of you.
It is mainly these six keys that make up resilience in a relationship. With these characteristics in mind, we can forge a loving relationship that heals every time there is a problem, learns from difficulties and emerges stronger than ever when life throws adversity at us.
(Updated at Apr 13 / 2024)