The 10 characteristics of relationships that cancel us out.
Several harmful relational dynamics that can occur in a couple's relationship.
Fortunately, nowadays society is becoming more and more aware of the dangers of toxic relationships, ie, those in which the actions of one of the partners are aimed at annulling the other person..
However, it should not be forgotten that people involved in a romantic relationship lose much of their ability to analyze their situation objectively, so it is common for people who suffer discomfort from their courtship or marriage to resist recognizing that problematic relational dynamic. And in situations like this, help is needed to understand and manage the problems arising from such bonds.
How are couple relationships that can annul us?
Professionals in psychology and human behavior take into account a series of characteristic elements that, when used by one of the partners, can cancel out the other partner.
Below you will find a list of the most important characteristics that can annul one of the partners.
1. Jealousy
Jealousy in a couple is one of the main sources of discomfort that can cancel out one or both partners.
Although in some occasions they are usually a habitual answer in some couples, the certain thing is that the jealousies, when they are recurrent and very intense, can indicate that we are before a problem that can derive in situations of mistreatment.
It is important to remember that excessive jealousy in a person is not so much related to love, but rather to the need to control the partner. and that can be the origin of a toxic relationship.
2. Excessive control
Most abusive relationships are also based on the control and submission towards the other personThis is a way of annulling him or her as an individual, diminishing his or her self-esteem and turning him or her into a slave.
Some of the forms of control can be imposing strict schedules of arrival home, prohibiting to meet with friends or relatives, constantly giving opinions about the appearance or clothing of the other person and also prohibiting the other person to wear certain clothes or do certain activities.
Although not to the extreme of abuse, some relationships are based on a subtle control of one party towards the other person. In such cases it is also important to prevent the other partner from controlling us or preventing us from carrying out any activity in our daily life.If necessary, seek help and break off the relationship immediately.
The way to avoid an excessive control of the partner towards oneself consists of establishing limits and own spaces where the other person does not have the right to give an opinion nor to control our will.
3. Impositions
Another element closely related to the control in the couple are the impositions: imposition of your plans for the future, personal tastes, etc.
Again, it is necessary to claim one's own rights and prevent the other person from imposing anything beyond our will, establishing clear personal limits that should not be exceeded.
For a couple's relationship to work properly, agreements or points in common must be reached through consensus and never imposing anything on the other person.
4. Disrespect
Disrespect is another of the classic ways of annulling the other partner, and its constant presence can be the definitive sign that the other person is not respectful. their constant presence can be the definitive sign that we are in a toxic relationship or directly based on abuse..
The lack of respect can be subtle or very obvious, and can occur both in public and in private; in either case, they aim to humiliate the other person or submit to the will of the partner.
5. Relationship based on fear of rejection
Instilling fear of abandonment or rejection is also a mechanism to override the other partner, and is one of the most common forms of abuse that exist.
One of the ways in which fear can present itself as a relationship mechanism can occur when one of the partners is afraid to express his or her opinion on a certain subject for fear that the other person will get angry..
6. Unequal division of labor
As in any other type of relationship, relationships should be based on equality of both rights and obligations..
An unequal sharing of housework can be a sign of abuse or disregard for the other person and is also an effective way of overriding his or her will or humiliating him or her.
Sharing common tasks, whether at home or with the children, is a sign of respect and consideration for the other person and a good way to get deeply involved to ensure the good future of the relationship.
7. Lack of empathy
Empathy is the ability to put oneself in the other person's place.It is an essential quality for the functioning of a couple's relationship, as well as any other social interaction.
In this regard, it is important not only to be aware of the feelings of the other person but also to react accordingly and quickly to help in any way possible whenever our partner may be going through a period of discomfort or has had a difficult day.
8. Lack of recognition of merits
As well as disrespect, indifference to their feelings or to the person's accomplishments. is also a way to undermine their self-esteem and generate a state of discomfort.
Being aware of our partner's needs for affection or recognition and being attentive at all times to his or her achievements is a way of showing affection and dedication.
9. Emotional blackmail
Emotional blackmail is a very common form of manipulation in some couples and that some people put into practice in order to get something in return.
This practice can even annul the person who is the victim of the blackmail, making him/her feel entirely responsible. making him/her feel entirely responsible for the welfare of the other person..
10. Constant criticism
Some people, both men and women, have a tendency to tend to constantly criticize their partners in everything they do or say.Often this form of relationship becomes an increasingly common mechanism as the relationship progresses.
Having a partner who habitually criticizes any aspect of our person ends up being very negative on a psychological level and is a very effective mechanism of annulment.
(Updated at Apr 13 / 2024)