The Complementary Needs Theory by Robert Winch

A summary of the Complementary Needs Theory, which talks about falling in love.

Robert Winch was an American sociologist who, in the 1950s, developed a theory known as "complementary needs theory" in order to developed a theory known as the "complementary needs theory" in order to explain the factors that influence the attraction between two people to become a couple in order for them to become a couple.

Robert Winch's complementary needs theory arose from a study of his in which he tried to investigate the ways in which complementarity occurred between the 25 couples who participated in the study. In it, he determined that for two people to fall in love to the point of seeing each other as the ideal couple, they had to complement each other, taking into account a series of factors that we will detail below.

What is the Complementary Needs Theory?

Robert Winch's complementary needs theory, located within the fields of sociology and social psychology and oriented in the study of couple formation, was developed from a study that Winch conducted with 25 couples in order to to investigate the ways in which complementarity was produced in the selection of couples..

The first step in this process of selecting a potential partner is through appointments between the two partners, once they have previously arranged to meet because of the initial attraction that may exist between them.

The next steps in the formation of a couple would be given by means of a series of appointments between both members to a series of appointments between both members over time to facilitate falling in love with each other.being the previous step to the establishment of a sentimental relationship.

Winch himself proposed that, in addition to dating being the previous step to falling in love, the most common way to meet that potential partner with whom we can have greater complementarity is that it takes place within the environments in which we usually move.

For this step to take place, according to the theory of complementarity a person chooses who he or she would like to be his or her partner by looking for someone who has needs that are complementary to his or her own.Therefore, if each member of the potential couple saw in the other a complementarity with him/herself, both would want to take the definitive step of forming a sentimental couple.

In the development of the complementary needs theory, Winch also observed that the people evaluated, in addition to choosing people complementary to them in terms of tastes, values and hobbies as potential partners, also looked at other factors such as religion, race, social class, level of education, place of residence, etc. According to this theory, when these factors we have just listed are common or at least quite similar, they make it easier for two people to form a couple.

In the theory of complementary needs, those people who fit within the complementary factors for a person have been qualified as the "field of candidates for a spouse of choice". "field of eligible spousal candidates".One of these people could be someone we see on a daily basis (for example, the waiter at the coffee shop where we usually have coffee every morning, a classmate or co-worker, someone who goes to the same gym as us, etc.).

The idea of polar opposites

It is quite frequent to hear the idea that "opposite poles attract", being a topic that Robert Winch also investigated. While it is true that they can attract, it does not mean that it will last. Although we are not going to say that two people who are quite different cannot have a lasting relationship, since putting both of them on their side they could find some common ground and there are other factors that may be more important. there are other factors that are perhaps more important for a relationship to work in the long runThe same is true on the opposite side, and that is that even if two people agree on most of the factors they consider important for wanting to form a couple, it does not mean that success is guaranteed.

The same happens on the opposite side, and is that although two people agree on most of the factors that are considered important to want to form a couple, it does not mean that success is guaranteed and is that as we know, in the field of relationships is not all sota, horse and king, but it is something much more complex and there are several factors that influence whether a relationship will work or not.

Regarding the idea that opposites attract, the theory of complementary needs states that it is complementarity that makes it easier for a relationship to work, so that each partner is the support of the other when needed. (e.g., when one person arrives in a bad mood because of a hard day at work, the other can be there to appease her, when a person is angry for some reason, her partner can be there to put the brakes on and help her think clearly before acting, or they can encourage each other).

As we can see, the theory of complementary needs is based on an idea that is intermediate to the one of the complementary needs theory. is based on an idea that is intermediate to that of polar opposites and those that affirm that people who agree on everything will be successful as a couple, i.e., that having certain tastes and preferences is the only way to be successful.That is to say that having certain tastes, values and even religion or social status, favors that two people could show mutual interest but it is also important that they complement each other, because if they coincide in everything and do not find a complementarity, it is possible that the relationship does not last as long as it was thought at the beginning.

The theory of complementary needs states that it is this complementarity between two people that favors the strengthening of their bonds as a couple, so that in addition to the common factors being important for there to be an attraction between them, the differences that both have also play in favor, so that they serve to complement each other. And the fact is that it is very common that a person is attracted to another person who has different traits from his or her own (e.g., a shy or timid person). (for example, a shy person who is attracted to an extroverted person and vice versa).

Some examples of people who could become a couple according to the theory of complementary needs would be the following: a confident person with an insecure person, a dreamer with a person who is more focused on the realistic side of things, a loving person with a person who is more cold, an insecure person with a person who is more decisive, etc. In other words, according to this theory, complementarity would come to occur in personality factors or ways of acting, having previous common factors such as values, beliefs, etc.

In short, it is the mutual feedback that can help a relationship to work in the long term.Both members being allies in the sense that each member is the support of the concerns of the other and that the same happens the other way around, and this can be achieved through active listening, so that they know how they can support each other, when necessary, and also know when the other person needs help to know how to act at all times in order to provide that support.

Main factors that influence the attraction between two people

Now that we have seen in broad strokes what the theory of complementary needs consists of, we are going to explain some important factors for mutual attraction between two people according to various theories in the field of social psychology.

1. Similarity within the attraction between two people

Heider's equilibrium theory states that two people who are similar in various factors will be more attracted to each other than to others with whom they have more differences than similarities.This establishes a principle of similarity according to which people who are similar can form a system that is balanced and in harmony, while the opposite could cause them psychological discomfort.

On the other hand, much of the research carried out in recent decades in the field of social psychology on the attraction between two people affirms that people tend to be more attracted to others who are similar to them in terms of a series of characteristics, attitudes, values and beliefs.

This statement made in social psychology would be a point in common with Winch's theory of complementary needs, since this theory also stated that people tended to be attracted to others who were similar to them in terms of a number of factors, but then differ in terms of different personality traits and way of being, this being what forms the complementarity of which he spoke in his theory.

2. Familiarity in the attraction between two people

According to some theories of social psychology about interpersonal attraction, people tend to be more attracted to each other, people tend to be more attracted to others who are familiar to them than to others who are unfamiliar to them.This idea may also be supported by the effect of mere exposure. In addition, people tend to notice more those who live closer to them, which favors the establishment of a sentimental bond.

In this sense, the complementary needs theory also stated that it was a very important factor that both people reside in the same locality or at least that their places of residence are not at a considerable distance.