The psychology of attraction, in 12 key points
What are the psychological and neuroscientific keys that explain physical attraction?
What does science say about attraction? What are the results of the research carried out by psychologists on this phenomenon?
In this article you will find the 12 keys to the psychology of attraction and the mysteries surrounding the relationship between our brain and our behavior related to the act of attraction.
Psychology of attraction and research
Psychologists have been trying for years to know more about attraction, for example, why and how this process occurs, why we are attracted to some people and not to others. Today it is thought that cultural and Biological variables are involved in attraction, but attraction is an abstract concept and there has not always been a consensus on the subject. In fact, some researches have provided certainly curious data. You can learn about them in this article: "Love and falling in love: 7 surprising researches".
On the other hand, it is known that the dynamics of affective-sexual attraction move through different logics, above all, taking into account two criteria. The first is the biological sex of the person, whether he or she is male or female: what some find attractive does not necessarily have to be attractive to others, and vice versa, while within each of these groups we can detect common patterns. On the other hand, the level of attraction felt for someone with the idea of looking for a sexual partner is not the same as the level of attraction felt for someone with the idea of finding a sentimental partner with whom to live together indefinitely. Both situations pose different needs and objectives.
Keys to the psychology of attraction
Practically all human beings can feel attraction for someone, with the exception of asexuals (or rather, part of them). When someone attracts us and makes us feel that special sensation, our world changes. That person becomes our target and no matter what happens we want to melt into their body. Society may have evolved, but our innate instincts such as attraction have not.
So... what does psychology have to say about this? What are the keys to the psychology of attraction? To find out, just read on.
1. Handsome or ugly?
One of the big questions that many of us ask ourselves is whether being handsome is so important when it comes to flirting. In fact, I'm sure you all agree that there are not very attractive people who are successful in love and attraction..
According to an investigation published in the British newspaper "The Telegraph", the key to this is the attitude shown by some people. There are many individuals who, despite being unattractive, show great security and self-confidence. Perhaps good looks are not so important after all.
- Recommended article: "Does physique matter when it comes to flirting? 3 reflections on beauty".
2. Better funny and intriguing
A person may be attractive and successful, and if they are also very confident, they are certainly captivating. But what if he or she is boring?
Maybe we don't like them so much anymore. This is according to John Medina, a biologist who concludes that the brain has a very short attention span. So we are attracted to people and things that are fun, interesting, intriguing and catch our attention. After all, attraction is not just about a pretty face. It's about it is the moments we share with that person that accentuate these intimate accentuate those intimate moments.
3. 30 seconds is enough
You may have heard many times the phrase that the first impression is what counts, and this could be true when it comes to attraction. Have you ever had a crush as soon as you saw that special someone?
Research claims that it only takes 30 seconds to feel attraction for a person.. Maybe looks do matter then.
4. Red: color of attraction
Colors provoke emotions in people, and red is associated with love, passion and fertility for many reasons. Now, it seems that red could be the color of attraction, according to a study.
These researchers conclude that red is the color that both men and women should dress in, because it suits us better and makes us look more attractive.because it suits us better and makes other people want us more. In other words, it increases our seductive power.
5. Symmetry
A University of Mexico study led by a biologist found that both men and women find people of the opposite sex who have a more symmetrical face and body more attractive. find people of the opposite sex with more symmetrical faces and bodies more attractive..
This is because the brain associates symmetry with good genetics. Also, the study concluded that people with more symmetrical features enjoy a more pleasurable intimate life.
6. A question of curves
Although the fashion world or magazines are determined to make us fans of thin people, the reality is that curves are still successful among men. This is what a study by Devendra Singh, a psychologist and researcher at the University of Texas, found.
According to his findings, a woman's figure that resembles an hourglass is the most attractive.... In the case of women, they prefer men with broader shoulders.
7. Body language
Body language has been one of the most studied topics, and it has been concluded that open body language is attractive to both men and women.. This type of body language shows willingness to court, which helps to initiate conversations. Exposing your torso, raised shoulders, or showing your neck make you more attractive.
- You can learn more about this topic in our article: "The 6 signs that show physical attraction to another person".
8. Facial structure
There seems to be a relationship between facial structure and what happens in our body. Estrogen contributes to the growth of bones in the face of women, specifically the lower face or chin.
In men, testosterone is involved in the development of the lower face, jaw or prominent forehead. These structures of the face are attractive to the opposite sex..
9. Smell
A recent study has shown that women smell better and are more attractive to men at certain times of the month, which has to do with the menstrual cycle.which has to do with the menstrual cycle.
For them, men who smell better are those with symmetrical features. Other research found that women during menstruation have a finer sense of smell and are more attracted to men with symmetrical features.
10. Particularities of the voice
The voice we emit can also be an aphrodisiac.. Science has shown that men prefer women with a higher pitched voice. While women prefer men with deep voices. This has to do with hormones and the reproductive development of the species.
11. Dilated pupils give away
The look is undoubtedly one of the keys to attraction. A deep look can touch our hearts. Science says that dilated pupils give away our attraction to another person..
When they become larger, it may indicate that the other person is attracted to you. That's according to research from the University of Chicago led by Dr. Eckhard Hess.
12. Signs of attraction
But also: what signs do men and women show when we feel attraction? Science has come to the following conclusions.
A man interested in a woman tends to:
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Make eye contact more often
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Smile more
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Do more self-care behaviors. For example, put on a tie
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Sit upright
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Put shoulders back and chest outward
A woman, on the other hand, performs these behaviors:
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Smile and maintain eye contact more frequently, just as men do.
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Perform a slight leaning toward the person they are attracted to
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Expose hands, neck and palms
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Cruzar y descruzar las piernas
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Realiza cuidado de su piel más que de costumbre
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Tocarse el pelo
Referencias bibliográficas:
- Kanazawa, S. (2011). Intelligence and physical attractiveness. Intelligence, 39(1): pp. 7 - 14.
- Miller, R., Perlman, D., y Brehm, S.S. (2014). Intimate Relationships. McGrawHill Companies.
- Vacharkulksemsuk, T. (2016). Dominant, open nonverbal displays are attractive at zero-acquaintance. Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences of the United States of America, 113(15): pp. 4009 - 4014.
(Updated at Apr 13 / 2024)