Why is it so easy to fall in love with psychopaths?

Psychopathic traits can offer advantages when it comes to generating attraction in others.

Psychopaths are often portrayed in series and movies as characters who only act in obedience to their thirst for cruelty and sadism.

They think coldly, show no empathy and are often not only violent, but also engage in activities considered aberrant. In short, they are the antipodes of what could be considered a partner with whom to share a loving relationship..

People who are noted for their level of psychopathy need not feel the need to kill or harm people, but there is something about them that is almost always true: they manipulate others, even without realizing it.. And, moreover, they are very good at this task.

There are two reasons for this. On the one hand, psychopaths objectify people.which means that they do not perceive them so much as beings with a mental life of their own that can be empathized with, but rather as highly complex robots or characters in a video game. This characteristic is present in different intensities depending on the psychopath: some of them totally objectify others, while others only do so to a significantly greater degree than the population average.

On the other hand, objectification makes them feel no qualms about lying and manipulation.. The only concern in doing so will be that one is not found to be doing something socially wrong, but beyond this there will be few moral constraints that make the behavior of the manipulating or lying psychopath appear insecure because of an internal struggle.

In other words, in people with a high degree of psychopathy, lies can flow like water, and saying something that is not true can pose the same moral challenges as snapping one's fingers.

This means that psychopaths have a very Wide range of performance range when it comes to pretending something they are not, which means they have more advantages when it comes to seducing and and getting someone to fall in love with them through deception.. All this, moreover, without the need to train in lying.

Detecting the weaknesses of others

In addition to having the ability to offer a totally unrealistic side of themselves, psychopaths have another ace up their sleeve when it comes to navigating the world of romantic relationships by cheating: they are very adept at detecting psychological vulnerabilities in others..

That means that this kind of people have an amazing ability when it comes to knowing what kind of actions and initiatives can be appreciated by someone, either because of certain shortcomings or because of fears and insecurities.

For example, research showed that people who scored high on a psychopathy scale were able to intuitively detect who had been sexually abused in the past? simply by looking at the way they walked. This was not true for people who did not score significantly high on the test.

In this way, psychopaths start with insider information about the weaknesses of others that they can use to their advantage by offering elements that others need and rarely find in other potential partners. As cruel as it sounds, using intimate information to make oneself more desirable can be something that works when it comes to seduction.

Hybristophilia

So far we have seen the seductive potential that psychopaths are able to offer through a mask that hides their propensity for manipulation; that is, in cases where the partner is not fully aware of their lover's psychological quirks.

However, even in cases where the person with a high degree of psychopathy has become accustomed to acting violently, it is possible to feel attraction to this fact. When aggressiveness is articulated in a rational way in pursuit of an end, it can lead to the appearance of Hybristophilia, which is the sexual attraction to violent people willing to commit crimes, may appear..

Especially if the person with psychopathic traits is male, the fit between this aggressiveness and masculine gender roles contributes to this tendency to harm others being seen as an expression of manhood and autonomy.

However, hybristophilia is very rare and certainly does not occur in everyone. That does not mean, however, that certain degrees of hostility and aggressiveness cannot be used to find a mate.

Dark thriad and love

Even if aggression and hostility do not take the form of crimes, for many people they can be more attractive than peacefulness; in fact, a concept known as dark thriad, which has often been linked to a pattern of sexual preference for narcissistic, manipulative and psychopathic men.

Why does this happen? It is difficult to find a rational logic beyond the possibility that certain people may be predisposed to be attracted to extremely individualistic, manipulative, and psychopathic people. attracted to extremely individualistic people, the paradigm of which is psychopaths..

From an evolutionary perspective, it is reasonable to suppose that the genes of some individuals predispose them to seek the company of this kind of personalities, given that in certain contexts having offspring with people of this kind may increase the chances of successfully passing on the genes.

• Related article, "What happens when a psychopath falls in love?"